Problem communicating with cat's vet.

If I had a therapist I could trust, I would bring this up with them. But I don't trust any of them, I’ve tried so many. . .

So I wonder if anyone here could give me some input and suggestions? Frankly, I don’t get along with my cat's dermatology vet. She’s very directive and I feel talked down to when I have questions or, like now, I haven’t given him the shots for several weeks because he gets upset with me when I do it and so he moves too much and so it hurts him apparently more than it does for most cats, or if their owners do it correctly.

His allergy has flared up again and I could drive an hour and 15 minutes away to another specialist, but then all the testing would have to be redone in addition to the long drive.

I’ve developed a creative way of keeping a bandage on his legs when the allergy flares up, and he tolerates that and has gotten used to it. But the vet very much likes to be “in charge” and I feel put down and “bad” that I haven’t followed her directions – despite the fact that I have brought the animal to her clinic and paid her a lot.

Well, maybe she wouldn’t like to lose me as a client anyway. But right now I have a “one-down” attitude which seems to translate into her being more directive, repeating the talked-down to effect on me.

I'm very depressed and having trouble with "life" anyway, and hence this problem seems insolvable.

Any insights or suggestions would be appreciated!

I can't really help as far as vets go. But I did write recently that doctors don't seem to care for the person (or animal) as a whole.

Their job is to keep the physical body going. Then on to the next physical body, be it an animal or a person.
We have become separate "parts" to the medical community....

This has been my experience anyway.

What you need is to find someone who's actually sympathetic to both you and your cat. Is there a reason you have to see a dermatologist specifically? Why would the testing have to be redone?

We are people and should be treated as people...especially when it comes to us being caretakers because a caretaker is a patient of sorts, too. We need support of all kinds.

It's not insolvable. Are you able to go to a clinic just for them to administer the shots? Or your local place? Someone other than your current vet.

Once again, just suggestions and sympathy.....

Hugs to you.

Your vet sounds like she probably has some idea when it comes to animal care; but she does; however; totally suck in the people skill's department!

I've had my fair share of dealings of people who have absolutely no interaction skills what so ever - they've been rude and arrogant. It upset me quite a bit at first; but then I had to take 10 steps back and remind myself it's them, not me; hold my head up high; and carry on with my day.

Vets and animal people as a rule will be much more sympathetic if they feel your not allowing your human issues to get in the way of your care taking.

Clearly she sucks at people skills, but the worse your cat gets the less sympathetic she will be once you do get to her.
Advice. Ask her for assistance, admitted your struggling to administer his meds. I can guarantee you he is making more of a fuss and making it seem far worse than it is.
He will feed off your anxiety and become afraid before you have even approached him with the needle.
It is your fear that will escalate his.
Ask your vet for clear instructions and if she would help while you administer a shot while she is there. So she can assist with you finding the easiest way to do it.
Explain you don't feel confident and that the cat is suffering as a result.

Holding your hands up in this way takes away any power of criticism she may have.
And if she is a vet worth half her salt she will do what's best for your cat.

I know this all seems like a lot, but I have worked in animal care for decades, keep the focus on the pet, and remember that's what it's about.
I strongly advise you address this asap though, before his condition starts to cause him distress.

Good luck and all the best.