Bachelor marrying a single mom

Hi,
I just wanted to know all the possible socio-psychological situations and impacts that could appear in my life if i marry a very an apparently very sober and nice 27 yr old woman (2 yrs older than me) with an adorable 4 yr old son.
What i need advice on:
a) I understand i'll have to control my desires since the boy would be sharing his mother with me, but to what extent could that go? (Its a marriage based on empathy and good will since i love to give to humanity in general) I havent fallen in love with her yet but shes really worth it

b) How could i spend private time with her since the boy is just 4 yet?
c)Could single mothers generally have a niche in their heart for sex the way a bachelor girl does? (Im very desirable among women in general)
d)How could i steer the relationship in a positive direction if say i marry her

Generally my main concern is that the woman would not tend to my needs since im a virgin and im afraid i'll make it difficult for her regarding the son and psychological sharing thing, obviously i wont sleep with her and the boy in the same bed What should i decide with that any single mothers out there with advice?
Thank you in advance

Take it easy and one step at a time.

You said you haven't fallen in love with her yet ... so don't even think about marriage.

As you get to know her, and get to know her son, these issues will work themselves out natural for the two of you.

If the son is such a big issue (for seemingly some of the wrong reasons) perhaps this is not something you should be committing yourself to right now .......

Don't rush anything.

Being in a relationship with a mom comes with a lot of give and take.

For myself ? I love my second husband to the moon and back but had he gotten upset about my daughter or even thought to make me decide who gets more time ( certain things) my daughter would always come first.

It's all give and take and NOONE should keep score.

thanx.. much appreciated!!!

thanx christina. cud i ask u something? definitely a bond b/w a son and mom shud be stronger than a daughter and mom so plz clarify "give and take" a bit and "certain things" too

I have both sons and daughters and completely disagree that a bond is stronger between mother and son. They are the same among your children.

I'm not a single mother, but my kids would always come first. As in making sure their needs are met is my priority. I would have a problem with any man who felt threatened by that.

very nicely straightforwardly explained

The give and take I speak of is that she does make time for you, but at times you will have to understand that her kids will come first whether the child is a girl or boy.

Example years ago when my daughter was in college she got sick her collage was 4 hours away , my husband and I had planned a short vacation , I headed to her as she needed me more than we needed at vacation,

But you need not even really worry at this point .... it's way to soon to be worried about marriage to her

First of all, do not rush into ANYTHING with this woman. And I'm really concerned with the way you describe your "desires" referring to your sexual needs, although you're still a virgin. You make it sound as though your main focus will be to have sex with this woman 24/7, and you wonder how you can be a good influence to her 4 year old son, while you're having all of that supposed sex with his mother. That is very concerning to me, because you're already talking about marriage, before you've even slept with this woman yet.

Don't even think about marriage or the boundaries and responsibilities that go with being a step-parent, until you've dated this woman to the point where she trusts you enough to be around her son, and where you both are ready to discuss marriage.

Don't put the cart before the horse. If you do, your cart will go nowhere, and your horse will just stand there and starve to death.

It sounds you may be overthinking things. Every relationship is different and you may get loads of good advice or not, but at the end of the day you have to decide with your gf, not anyone here.

How is the bond between mother and son is stronger than mother and daughter? Where you get that info from? That's misguided. I also find it strange that you think mothers would be less open for sex than not mothers. Not the case

You worry too early. If you aren't in love yet don't even worry about the future

Find a single woman without child. you have some serious reservations and preconceived notions about single moms that are going to prevent you from being able to accept her as she is.