[Jellyfish18]

I often feel lonely, I am living with other girls right now and it is not easy for me to build a relationship with them. So I am in room and just don't know what to do with the time. Other people always find something to do. I have been in bed for over two weeks, day and night (not depressed in mood) and feeling bad about it but I can't really focus on other things. Plus I don't know what I can do, also to feel less alone. I feel stuck. I do go out for a walk. With a job, it can feel worse when I am working and there are still no deeper relationships. How can I fill my time to feel less alone?
I am also trying groups so you don't need to mention that. The thing is, even there I don't find it very easy to build a relationship..

I have tried meeting acquaintances and to build a friendship. Maybe it's just a feeling but it doesn't feel like it's going great and people don't text me again, I tend to. It makes me worry and reluctant to try again in fear of alienating. The same as I try to speak to flatmates but it doesn't seem to be going somewhere. It stays formal and I seem to bore the people. I want to change my life, so what to do about this?

[Sunflower123]

Is it possibly your perception or your insecurities that make it seem like things aren't going well? What if you asked your roommates if you can join them the next time they watch tv or sit around talking or go out? It will take a few times to feel comfortable. If you continue feeling rejected or awkward, ask for feedback from the ones you've tried to connect with.

In the meantime setting up a routine or schedule for yourself can keep you out of bed. Set goals for yourself and add things you find fulfilling and build them into your routine. You have time to work on being the best version of yourself you can be. I'm not saying it will be easy...I have social anxiety so I know it's tough but it's worth it.

Best wishes.

[Jellyfish18]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Is it possibly your perception or your insecurities that make it seem like things aren't going well? What if you asked your roommates if you can join them the next time they watch tv or sit around talking or go out? It will take a few times to feel comfortable. If you continue feeling rejected or awkward, ask for feedback from the ones you've tried to connect with.

In the meantime setting up a routine or schedule for yourself can keep you out of bed. Set goals for yourself and add things you find fulfilling and build them into your routine. You have time to work on being the best version of yourself you can be. I'm not saying it will be easy...I have social anxiety so I know it's tough but it's worth it.

Best wishes.

So what is it that I CAN do? I feel like I'm in prison and have no idea what to do with the time. Doing solitary activities makes me feel more lonely sometimes, also nobody cares if I am in bed all the time. I asked family to call me daily and they don't even do that. I feel awful and all I can do is sleep.
The roommate relationships don't help. I try to talk but it goes nowhere frequently. I think they all went to the beach together without inviting me so yes there is something I'm not doing fine.

[divine1966]

If you stayed in bed for two weeks then someone must be paying your bills? Are you in group home or assisted living facility? Do you have some type of treatment provider? Could you work even part time? Go to school? I am confused on you being in bed all the time. Are you getting treatment?

[Jellyfish18]

Originally Posted by divine1966

If you stayed in bed for two weeks then someone must be paying your bills? Are you in group home or assisted living facility? Do you have some type of treatment provider? Could you work even part time? Go to school? I am confused on you being in bed all the time. Are you getting treatment?

I have something saved up, of course I can't continue this way. I don't need "treatment" but someone to care about my life and what I do in it. I could work but the relationships stay so shallow I begin to feel unwell sometimes... but yes I will try and find something. What I am saying is the quality of my relationships is really affecting all else.

[scorpiosis37]

I think most people would feel lonely and sad if they laid in bed all day and were not doing something useful/productive. Why not either go to school, get a job, or volunteer? Get up in the morning and do something productive-- either for yourself (job to make money) or for someone else (volunteer). You will feel better about yourself and meet other people if you are doing something useful. What kinds of activities do you enjoy? What have you done for work in the past? Are there any degrees you might want to obtain?

[Jellyfish18]

Originally Posted by scorpiosis37

I think most people would feel lonely and sad if they laid in bed all day and were not doing something useful/productive. Why not either go to school, get a job, or volunteer? Get up in the morning and do something productive-- either for yourself (job to make money) or for someone else (volunteer). You will feel better about yourself and meet other people if you are doing something useful. What kinds of activities do you enjoy? What have you done for work in the past? Are there any degrees you might want to obtain?

I did many things and even now I am going to volunteer and possibly work. But again, it is even worse to be among people sometimes and see you cannot build close relationships, or something is off... It has made me change jobs too frequently in the past etc. I feel like I cannot get close to people.

[divine1966]

Originally Posted by Jellyfish18

I have something saved up, of course I can't continue this way. I don't need "treatment" but someone to care about my life and what I do in it. I could work but the relationships stay so shallow I begin to feel unwell sometimes... but yes I will try and find something. What I am saying is the quality of my relationships is really affecting all else.

Unless you are on disability or full time in school and take loans, I am confused how you can afford lay in bed for days or weeks regardless how your relationships go. Most people still have to work and pay bills even if their relationships suck and no one cares about them. For most people working is not optional.

That much idle time can't be good. But if you have hard time getting out of bed and having hard time getting close to people, it might be something you need professional help with. Have you considered therapy?

[Teddy Bear]

Is your bed a comfort spot. It is for me but I'm still lonely. I don't have any friends. I have family and I go to church. Do you get out at all? I have difficulty building new relationships as well.