need male advice

i need some male perspective. if you read any of my other posts you can see im going crazy here. my boyfriend of 9 years just left me and i can't deal, and im trying to figure things out. to elaborate this is what he has told me. like i said we have been together for 9 years, he has told me he wants space to be by himself to figure things out. he said there is no other girl, and as far as i can tell he's telling the truth. he says he feels like hes at a crossroads, but doesn't explain the crossroads to me. he says he unhappy in general, not necessarily with me but just himself, and that if he can't be happy with himself he can't make me happy. he does suffer from depression, anxiety, and i suspect some form of bipolar. he never wants to get help and doesn't much talk to me about it, he would just complain. i do know he's also very stressed also and we have never lived together. he currently lives with his father who is a horrible alcoholic . he is in a band that he likes but they cause issues. he says he never has time for anything. the breakup was out of nowhere, and im so lost, this was someone i wanted to spend my life with. i was always supportive and tried to help him. do any of you guys out there think he come back to me? or what should i do? i've been freaking out this past month of this breakup, all i think is that i want him back. and i don't know what to do

I'm not a male so I'm not going to give advice as that's what you've requested.

I just wanted to give you my support and say I know how painful breakups are with people who you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with

I am a male. 42 years old. You need to think about a good family. A husband. Finding a good husband is difficult. Pray to God. Ask him to help you be a good wife for your future husband if it's His will for your to marry. Ask him to help you to be a good mother if it's His will for you to marry.

I am very serious about this.

I'm sorry you're going through such a rough time. Ending of relationship can be a grieving process and I went through the same process in my divorce.

Your breakup occurred very recently and I think it is hard to analyze right now what exactly happened during the relationship or to explore possible causes of the breakup. The question is also if that will really help you right now. Your ex made a decision and you can't make him change his mind. His responses do not sound encouraging that he is willing to make the relationship work again.

I do remember posts from you before about this relationship and based on what you described about this relationship (and I know you won't see it that way yet) this breakup might be a good thing for you on the longer term. You don't want to lose yourself in the relationship; another person can't fill a void of happiness. I think it is not realistic and also not fair to lay such a burden on the other one.

My advice is probably predictable but I think you need to try to move on. Try to do things that you like. In my situation it helped me to engage in activities I enjoyed and (although it was not easy) being around other people.

Good luck and believe me, I have been there and it is rough...You can do it and you will come out of it stronger too.

I'm not a male. Just wanted to say how sorry I am about your situation and that I'm here to support you.

Unfortunately you can't force him to get back to you.. so I think the best solution really is to move one. I know it's not going to be easy but it's the best thing to do..

I am a male, but I don't think this is a post about the perspective of a man.

You don't need to be a specific genre to understand this situation.

He won't be happy - with his life, and in turn you - if he wants and seeks help. If he can't do that, you are better off without him.

There are plenty of people to share your life with. You just make mistakes until it clicks.

I am not attempting to diminish the feelings you are having, I've been through this many times, but it will pass and you will realize you do not need him to be happy.

So this morning my ex asked me thru text where i was last night. We live in same apartment complex not same apartmemt. He said he didnt see my car and was asking where i stayed. I did come home just not til after him i sppose but why would he ask when hes the one who left me??