[tatime]

I've been married for 8 months second marriage for both of us. We are both in our early 50's and married in love. I love my husband. however, he is critical and demanding. I would talk to a family member for advice and now he accuses me of betraying him. He has named called me, insulted me, and asked me to leave. We have not been able to put this behind us. I refuse to be mistreated. He falsely accuses me and does not understand that I would have not gone to someone for help if he would have not been so critical . He now blames me, and says I hurt him. Our sex life and communication is terrible. We are both hurt and cannot seem to overcome this miscommunication. What do I do. I am looking for a therapist that can help us get back to our loving space.

[~Christina]

Will he go to Therapy ?

Has he changed his actions after getting married ? or is this something new?

What good qualities does he have?

Welcome to PC

Originally Posted by tatime

I've been married for 8 months second marriage for both of us. We are both in our early 50's and married in love. I love my husband. however, he is critical and demanding. I would talk to a family member for advice and now he accuses me of betraying him. He has named called me, insulted me, and asked me to leave. We have not been able to put this behind us. I refuse to be mistreated. He falsely accuses me and does not understand that I would have not gone to someone for help if he would have not been so critical . He now blames me, and says I hurt him. Our sex life and communication is terrible. We are both hurt and cannot seem to overcome this miscommunication. What do I do. I am looking for a therapist that can help us get back to our loving space.

Did you say he loves you? Sorry, but this is not love.

[Sunflower123]

Hello. Welcome to PC. Couples counseling sounds like a good idea. He is behaving in an obnoxious manner. I hope you can work this out in therapy or walk out with your head held high. You deserve better.

I agree with the others here. This does not sound good. Name calling and insults are not acceptable and are a form of verbal abuse. I am glad you know your limits, and I would definitely recommend a couples therapist, but he may not change his behavior. It's on HIM to make changes, and only in therapy will he see this. In the meantime, you can tell him whenever he acts like that that what he is saying to you is NOT OK, and that you will not accept that form of treatment. You can walk away and tell him you will talk to him when he can be respectful towards you. See what he does then.

[MickeyCheeky]

Sorry to hear this. Can you two go to couple counselling?

Originally Posted by tatime

I've been married for 8 months second marriage for both of us. We are both in our early 50's and married in love. I love my husband. however, he is critical and demanding. I would talk to a family member for advice and now he accuses me of betraying him. He has named called me, insulted me, and asked me to leave. We have not been able to put this behind us. I refuse to be mistreated. He falsely accuses me and does not understand that I would have not gone to someone for help if he would have not been so critical . He now blames me, and says I hurt him. Our sex life and communication is terrible. We are both hurt and cannot seem to overcome this miscommunication. What do I do. I am looking for a therapist that can help us get back to our loving space.

Since when has he been so critical and demanding? What is going on in his life? Any issues?

[eskielover]

Was he critical & demanding BEFORE you got married? Was this red flags before the wedding that you just didn't pay attention to?

Wonder if his previous wife would tell you.....yea, that's what caused the first marriage to fail.

Second marriages have baggage if the cause of the marriage failing was never resolved. Marriage counselling is about the only solution. If he is unwilling, I would write off the marriage & him as not being the kind of guy anyone should be married to.