i really need to vent about my mom

hello, im kyle. can i just complain to you for a moment? i need to vent.

my mom is a liar and it is potentially dangerous for me. she lied about my biological father until i was 18 made me believe it was my stepdad, while i shared the last name of my half-brothers, lied about her family, who i don't even know, lied about her education, as you will see etc. that's all fine, she's a liar, no one's perfect. it's my mom. i've dealt with it for 30 years, and now it's getting old. and possibly dangerous for me.

her ego needs to support these lies in such a way that is destructive to other people. she benefits from these lies at the expense of other people's wellbeing. for example, my grandma (her mom), and i were both diagnosed with bipolar. she has used those diagnoses to leverage the credibility of her lies to get us unnecessary treatment, including involuntary hospitalization when there was no emergency, and disability benefits that she will receive. since grandma is recently dead and now my mom's struggling with money, i think she is now trying to force disability benefits onto me, which i do not currently need, for her own future benefit. but i could be wrong. you never know with my mom. but anything is possible, i'm never surprised anymore.

with her, nothing is certain, anything could be true. here i have posted the most recent text conversation we had where she is lying about something i just cannot forget: one of my life events: the college i chose to study unergrad. i wanted to go to community college to transfer gen eds to a university. she refused me and threatened to kick me out of my home at 17 years old if i did that because "that's college is where all the trash goes. you are so much better than that."

but now she is doing the same thing. she transferred from a university to a community college. (spoiler alert: she tells everyone she is taking grad-level classes at a community college.) i am not sure how the educational system works anywhere else, but in the US, you don't take grad-level at community college. they just don't offer them.

oh, so she didn't like when I pointed out the fact, which i did in an assertive way, just saying facts, nothing harmful. so, in response, she threatened to take me to the mental hospital, even though there is no emergency. and then had my stepdad literally come downstairs to me and also follow-up with an additional threat to take me to ER, because of god knows what she told him.

she is so crazy, but she is not diagnosed with anything. she tells people she is studying grad level courses at a community college and honestly expects them to believe her, which might explain why all her friends with real graduate degrees no longer talk to her.

but when i was growing up she told me she didn't graduate high school and left her home etc. she gave birth to my brother william when she was 14, so it makes more sense she did not graduate high school.

bit.ly/2wEJIF3 is where i posted our latest text conversation that is causing me to seek additional feeback here at this forum.

i am looking for feedback, comments, suggests, the good, the bad, the ugly. i am slowly recovering from a depressive phase, i am diagnosed with bipolar NOS, and i do not feel like I am in an emergency situation that requires immediate medical attention.

however, i would like to know if my mom is doing anything illegal, whether my tone with her was wrong, and whatever else you'd like to add.
yes, i'm 30-f-ing years old and recently back at my mom's. something is not right. i need to get out of here quick. or she will kill me slowly with disability and make herself money.

sounds like i'm exagerrating a bit but maybe i'm not.


ok thanks for listening, kthxbye.
-kyle

Hello. Welcome to PC. I'm sorry you're having such a tough time with your mom. Here at Psych Central we can't diagnose people but I believe you and I would agree that she is a pathological liar for starters but what's more important is that she is toxic to you. There is nothing wrong with being 30 something and being at your mom's but you need to limit your exposure to her for the sake of your mental health.

Leave when you can. If you need disability, make sure you will be the one receiving it and not her in any way, shape or form unless she is a caregiver for you. Hopefully, other posters will weigh in. My heart goes out to you. Sending big hugs.

Trust comes hard when the other person is lying, chronically lying. It's hard not to feel anger when the person who is supposed to be responsible for your general well being behaves in a manipulative manner. Neglect is a tangled web that one does not just unravel from.
So, you have bipolar, it happens. Many people learn to thrive and manage with it. I'm sorry that she's making it about her.

I hope you find solace from many of the boards, stories and members on this forum.

Welcome to PC.