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Old Aug 30, 2017, 05:44 AM
theodora2312 theodora2312 is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2017
Location: bucharest
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I have meet this guy 4 months ago. He has been very sweet and attentive to me, besides these two uncommon events:
1) Asked about how are WE going to spend my birthday, Christmas and New Year (close events) he said that he must go to his family (that is in another country). No invitation.
2) Lied to me- told me that he is going to spend the weekend with one of his male friends at the seaside, instead I found out from Facebook (what a disgrace) that while he was telling me that he is drinking whiskey with his friend on the beach he was actually eating seafood in a near by country (still at the seaside) with his ex-girlfriend (who he described to me as crazy and with mental problems) and some random guy.
I am very OPEN and not at all clingy. I told him that I see no problem with him seeing his ex gf in larger groups (they are all expats) and he does not need to report about this to me. While is inevitable and unpolite to cut all connections with someone due to the fact that you have a gf, you cannot go and eat mussels with her in Bulgaria!
After confronting him about this dinner with his ex, he replied "i see no problem with going on holidays with friends". He only tried to call me once since then (that was yesterday).
After he came back from the seaside (before I knew ehat actually happened) he told me that maybe its better to meet 3 times a week (motivating that he is built this way...does not need to see someone every day)...before, he was seeing me every day (his choice- always).
I am really (90%) considering dumping him. I am extermely hurt and I do not think that I can trust him again. Am I too harsh?
Millions of thanks,
Theo
Hugs from:
Anonymous50909, Sunflower123

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  #2  
Old Aug 30, 2017, 02:58 PM
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gothicpear gothicpear is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2008
Location: Midwest
Posts: 45
I don't think you are too harsh, I think you are very smart. There was no reason for him to lie to you. He chose to lie to you anyway. When someone has to hide something from their partner, that's cheating. It doesn't matter if there is sex involved or not. He hid the fact that he was meeting with an ex. There was no reason for that.

Now he is wanting to see you less than before. He is breaking things off with you. I would advise not telling him what you know. He will just lie his way out of it and/or tell you that you've misunderstood, and then he will become more secretive the next time.

Trust your instincts. Walk away. Give him the same consideration that he has given to you, which is none. Save yourself before this becomes a huge mess.
  #3  
Old Aug 30, 2017, 03:07 PM
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Sunflower123 Sunflower123 is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 26,579
Hello. Welcome to PC. I agree with gothicpear. Walk away.
  #4  
Old Aug 30, 2017, 07:15 PM
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divine1966 divine1966 is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 23,222
When people suggest to see you less, it usually means they plan to end it. Good riddance. He is bad news. You can do better
  #5  
Old Aug 31, 2017, 01:40 AM
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Steiner of Thule Steiner of Thule is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2014
Location: Texas
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Bf lied to me...dissapointed and confused
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Bf lied to me...dissapointed and confused
  #6  
Old Aug 31, 2017, 06:03 AM
Anonymous40643
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IMO, you are not being harsh, and I agree with the above, it's smart. There was no reason for him to lie to you about the ex gf if it was innocent. He's hiding something, I do believe. And I do think he's planning to break it off if he wants to see you less. He may still be involved with the ex, for all you know. Wise to just break it off now and move on. Yes, trust your instincts here. ((((hugs))))
  #7  
Old Aug 31, 2017, 06:25 AM
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Teddy Bear Teddy Bear is offline
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Location: Dresser Wisconsin
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Welcome to PC
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