[PahaSapa]

just about every argument i have with my wife is the same she always wants to take pictures of me and i hate it i don't like the way i look and i hate looking at myself but she won't just drop it we argued about it again today. she crys and says she has no pictures of me and what about when were old and our son is older and theres no pictures i'm glad there won't be but she gets upset and today she cryed again. she says its cause i don't have any confidence and she thinks if she keeps saying good things about me and taking pictures i'll like how i look but it don't work like that i still hate looking at myself. am i being a jerk cause i won't let her take pictures of me?

[LMo]

Are you being a jerk? Kinda, yeah... what do you have to lose by letting her? It's for your family, not for you. Do you love your wife and son?

Lots of people get their pictures taken every day by the media or by tourists, without being asked permission. If you think you have it bad, imagine what it's like to live in a small impoverished village that's on a tourist circuit, having rich white foreigners snap intrusive pictures of you and your family without asking. At least your wife is asking for the good of your family as opposed to a souvenir.

But of course it's entirely up to you.

[snowflake_48888]

I dont like my pic taken either. I dont like the way I look..never have. I am not photogenic....so please stay away with a camera...........however they do take my pic every now and then when I dont know it.....
Snowy

Every now and again... I sneak a pic of my best friend... she hates having her pic taken... they do not have children..

I explained to her how very important it was to me to have some pictures of my best friend of 29 years.. well friends for most of my adult hood..

So of my 50th birthday we went had glamour shots done.. campy things like the red hat society stuff.. and ever since.. she now sends me pictures.. like when they are in a different state..

Please try really hard and put yourself in someone elses shoes..and see what your wife is saying..

I have no pictures of my parents... growing up... only their wedding day ones.. and I would give anything to have just one more.

In addition.. my mom.. was ill all of my life.. so my sister and I have no pictures of us at all growing up.. not even school pictures...

So please re-consider..... think that the person that will be viewing the picture will be someone that loves you very, very much.. and in their eyes.. you can do no wrong....
that you are "prefect"... because they love you so very much.

For my own son... I took lots and lots of pictures.. he is 23.. and he looks at them... it brings back good memories..
it also gives him a since of idenity.. you know.. yes there I am in my family.. there is my birthday at 4.. with Mom.. Dad.. and so on..

If nothing else, you would stop breaking.. and I mean breaking your wife's heart.. she is crying... she is hurting so badly... this has got to be taking a toll on your marriage..

The impact of what you are doing... hurting her.. will evently show up in your love life even.. yes women are like that... you hurt them enough.. and they won't feel tender and connected to you.. and believe me you keep it up.. and there will be a cost to be paid...

Just my opinion... offered so that you might re-think how you are handling this...
Let there be peace.. in your marriage.. extend yourself..

[GYPSYEYES]

{{{{{{sinny}}}}}}

no your not a jerk...you have the right to your own feelings..but.. trust me when i say.. youll look back one day at those pictures when "D" was a baby.&.be sooo glad you took those pictures no matter how you looked at the time. hell i even have pictures of me the second my daughter was born.. now thats a scary picture

[InACorner]

i hate my picture being taken..but like your wife...my bf is constantly snapping this camera ( i stupidly bought him for his bday) but i actually found a solution for the both of us.....i allow him to take pictures of me....however i am to approve of the ones i like and have the ones i dislike to be deleted (i bought him a camera with that screen on the back...and you can flip through the pictures you took and delete the ones without having to print them out) why dont you do that...

[selfy]

sin i know it must be difficult. maybe if you could just let her have one or two. its not like your family dont know what u look like. you dont have to let anyone else see them. im sure youcan work something out. maybe u need to work on your self confidence more, i am sure you look just as good as anyone else.
give dylan a hug for me
take care
self

[ECHOES]

this is about more than taking pictures.

you could let her take pictures and choose to not look at them. others would see you but that's nothing new, as people see you every day.

you might consider a couple of sessions with a couples therapist to sort this out and get to the heart of it, find a way to live with the fact that you each have different feelings and thoughts.