kind of personal

Ok, so i went swimming today with my friend lauren and her friend nicko (whose a guy) and we both know him, but i dont know him very well, we dont hang out unless lauren is here and since shes in Cali and im in Connecticut thats not very often. Ok. So getting to the point we went swimming but didnt have suits, so we wore pants and white shirts, my friend took her shirt off, no shame, and i after awhile decided to also.

Thing is i dont know if i should've because i have a boyfriend, however, absolutely nothing happened at all, it was all just innocent fun but i have a huge guilt complex and i dont know if what i did would be considered cheating or not. Im kind of upset, but i didnt hit on nicko or anything and whenever i came out of the water i stayed covered. Am i worrying over nothing? I feel pretty pathetic asking about this on here but i didnt know where else to ask. Hopefully someone can help me straighten this out. I love my boyfriend very much, we've been together for two years despite the fact that he slept with another girl. I love him to much to give up on the relationship, but it seems soemtimes i just do things like this, and i feel bad about it. Right now in my life im trying to define some boundaries in all areas of my life, but i dont know how. I have already been assaulted in the past, so with relationships its really hard to define boundaries because i want to make everyone happy, including myself but i feel really pushed and pulled. Its really hard, im only 20 and im still young so i guess I have time to figure it out but anyways....im really confused and was hoping someone would give me some peace of mind.

xo

emo

all things shall pass...even life.

I don't think this would be cheating on your boyfriend. If you were wearing a bra, or not cause you said that you covered yourself when you came up out of the water. And you said you didn't hit on this guy.

Though I would say that if this even causes you stress and worry you would just learn or remember in the future that you would not want to remove your shirt in the presense of a guy again, because of how much distress it caused you emotionally.

I would say you are doing well in maintaining your boundries, and not to worry yourself about it, only to remember that the swimming thing is outside of your boundries, and that it is not an option for you in the future.

Take care, Happy 4th.

______________
~KRIS~

If you think you have totally gave up, you haven't, because you are here!

I think Kris said it perfectly. I just am piping in for moral support and to let you know it is ok.
Take care of yourself,
Carrie

<font color=blue>If you have two dollars, spend one on bread and the other on flowers. The bread will feed your body and the flowers will feed your soul."--Arabic Saying