[rdgrad15]

Anyone else have the experience where it appears that other people appear to be happier when you are not around them as much or not as close to them? I've noticed this is very common with me and don't understand why it happens. It is a big reason why I have become more reclusive. I always have been reclusive but recently over the past few years there has been cases where I forced myself to put myself out there and take the initiative. And each time I tried to start a conversation with someone, whether I knew the person or just getting to know them, they would seem annoyed. But then when I would pull away, they actually seem happy and will even be more willing to talk to me. As a result of this, I have pulled back into my older ways where I just simply wait for others to come to me first.

I don't get why this is the case and don't know why people only like me at arms length and don't seem to want to get to know me any more than acquaintance level. If I try to make friends with someone, the person will pull back. That is fine if they don't want to be friends, I respect that. But at the same time, I wish I knew what was wrong with me or knew what I may be doing that causes people to only seem to like me when I maintain my distance. That's why I am always the type to just keep to myself and wait for others to talk to me first. I don't completely hide in a corner and ignore everyone, but at the same time, I will stand off to the side and figure that if someone really wants to talk to me, they know where I am and I'm ready to talk. Anyone know why people act this way? Just curious since it is annoying. And that's why I just wait for people to talk to me first, I figure if they really do want to talk to me, they'll take the initiative.

[Sunflower123]

I don’t know why this is happening. Could it just be your perception? Do you come on too strong when making friends? I don’t think you’ll know for sure unless you ask for feedback. I’m sorry this is happening to you. ((((Hugs)))).

They may empathize with your mood if you're depressed and feel closer to that mood.
That's why activities are great for bonding, because fulfilling mutual desires makes the participants happy and feel happier seeing everyone around them happy, so another bonus boost to happiness and connections.

[sky457]

I can slightly empathize with this. I've suffered from depression, anxiety, and social awkwardness for a long time due to my communication disorder. I realized that people reacted negatively when I tried too hard to fit in and not live life in the moment. Depression can also overflow and affect others.

Now that I've gotten better and accepted myself more, I have less of these issues.

Accept that you're awesome and people love you for who you are...because there is probably at least one who does. Don't try to impress people yet be a good person. Accept that you are important, but you don't have to prove yourself.