How do you stop having feelings for someone who, because of ethics and professional boundaries, you can never be with?

The reason I'm not going into detail is because anytime I do I just get reminded that it can't ever happen and why having a relationship with this person would be inappropriate. Knowing that still doesn't change how I feel , which really is terrible.

[All Is Revealed]

Originally Posted by iPhone

How do you stop having feelings for someone who, because of ethics and professional boundaries, you can never be with?

You must be in lots of pain right now. It's like a wound that will never heal, but you will always be able to see ...

Your feelings are real and valid. Your feelings cannot be wished away that easily. You can mentally distract yourself, but your feelings for that person will always be there.

You can date other people, or find your soul mate. But if your feelings for this person are that strong, you can find your soul mate today and still have feelings for this person tomorrow.

To lessen your feelings for this person, fill your heart with love for someone else, something else, or for yourself. Accepting the reality that you and this person will never be together helps too, and your pain will lessen as you accept the truth day by day.

[DP_2017]

Originally Posted by iPhone

How do you stop having feelings for someone who, because of ethics and professional boundaries, you can never be with?

The reason I'm not going into detail is because anytime I do I just get reminded that it can't ever happen and why having a relationship with this person would be inappropriate. Knowing that still doesn't change how I feel , which really is terrible.

Pretty sure I know what you are referring to and I am with you, I've actually gotten deeply depressed over it lately and I can't even talk to this person out my feelings which makes it worse. I feel so alone trying to deal with it all. I feel so many things... feel free to DM me anytime, we can chat privately about it

[Purple,Violet,Blue]

It's awful for you, just awful. As others have said, there aren't any shortcuts or magic cures. Throwing yourself whole-heartedly into something or someone else seems to be the most effective way.

[lunatic soul]

Im sorry, I have been there. I hope you will find a way to not feel so much pain, I wish you well!

I think the only way is cut all contacts if its possible, it helped me. if its your T you can talk to him about it, if its someone another and you are pretty sure you cant be with him, do what I said before. Yes its hard but its the only way to stop it.
You feel like in hell now with or without him. I know how it is. Leaving this person helped me, it was really hard and painful but now Im free of those feelings.

[seesaw]

I agree with lunatic soul. You know you can't be with this person, and you know it's not going to happen. By following the person's Instagram account and other social media and pseudo stalking her, you're only reminding yourself and not allowing yourself to heal and move on. You need to cut all contacts. Stop seeking this person out, stop looking at their social media, and distract yourself with other people and other things. The feelings you have for this person will fade. It's very similar to what happens when you go through a break up and need to heal. You can't heal if the reminder of the person is in front of you all the time.

Remember too, you don't know this person all that well. What you feel is a very strong crush or infatuation. It's not like you know how this person is away from their job, with their family, or if they are a good person. I have a feeling that what you love about this person is the idea of them, not actually who they are, because you aren't even friends in real life with this person.

And, if, when all is said and done, the universe actually intends for you two to be together, then something will happen to allow that. But in the meantime, you need to take care of yourself and heal and move on.

That's just my opinion.

Seesaw

[Bill3]

I agree: cut off all contacts. Unfollow, unfriend, block.

[DP_2017]

Originally Posted by iPhone

How do you stop having feelings for someone who, because of ethics and professional boundaries, you can never be with?

The reason I'm not going into detail is because anytime I do I just get reminded that it can't ever happen and why having a relationship with this person would be inappropriate. Knowing that still doesn't change how I feel , which really is terrible.

If it's the person I think it is, I would not cut them out of your life but encourage you to talk about it with them, its hard I know, I gotta do it myself but its basically all we got... and you never know what can happen in the future, sometimes things happen we never expect

[Bill3]

If it is a therapist then my advice is to discuss your feelings with that person.

It's not a therapist-it's someone who works in a psych hospital. I'm pretty sure she already knows I like her. I only see her when I'm hospitalized which unfortunately has been a lot. But I think about her the rest of the time .

I don't follow or friend her but I do look at her pics from time to time, which I need to stop doing.

Thanks for the advice.

[seesaw]

Originally Posted by iPhone

It's not a therapist-it's someone who works in a psych hospital.

I don't follow or friend her but I do look at her pics from time to time, which I need to stop doing.

Thanks for the advice.

I know you really like her, and I've done that too where I liked someone so I sort of cyber stalked them (in a jokey sense, not seriously) but I feel like this is something that's hurting you and keeping you from better things. Focus on getting well and staying out of the hospital, getting stable, then maybe a relationship, with someone who is not your care provider.