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#1
Feb 16, 2018, 07:26 PM
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I told my T about a crush on an older woman. She thinks my crush on the older woman is caused by abuse. I am honest with her and she’s not happy with my answers. I’m getting frustrated and she gets defensive when I confront her.
It started when I got mad because she didn’t approve of my friendship with an older woman. She wants to come out to my crush and tell her I’m physically attracted to her. I don’t feel comfortable doing that. I feel it’s not right to go up to some stranger and be like hey I’m attracted to you want to go out. I want to be friends with this woman first so I can “feel her out” but my T thinks that’s a horrible thing |
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#2
Feb 16, 2018, 07:45 PM
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It sounds like your T disagree with you. It is not that she thinks you are lying.
Also, did he say "this is a horrible idea" or are you interpreting her response in this way?
__________________
[B]'Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.' |
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#3
Feb 16, 2018, 08:36 PM
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My T says she’d be upset if someone be friended her then she found the person was interested in her.
I’m completely the opposite I don’t feel comfortable jumping into a relationships. I’m old fashioned friends first then it’s meant to be something else. If not I move on. At the very least I want to this woman to be my friend because she is very good at what she does and I would like her to be my mentor |
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#4
Feb 16, 2018, 08:44 PM
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How much faith do you put into therapy or your therapist ?
If you employ someone to listen and advise on your decisions and thoughts , you can reasonably expect they won't agree on everything you have evaluated . |
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#5
Feb 16, 2018, 08:51 PM
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Quote:
UNLESS...Are you female and interested in this woman as another female? Because then I could see how it's a little weird to be befriending someone you are romantically interested in versus just asking them out. Doesn't really change my thought on the matter, but I can see how it maybe could be a little weird or even seem creepy to befriend someone in this way. But honestly, people do this every day in every friendship, regardless of whether we are romantically interested. We feel other people out to see if there's a connection. Seems odd that your T wouldn't see that. Seesaw
__________________
 What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
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#6
Feb 16, 2018, 08:57 PM
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Quote:
It’s an older woman. I’m a woman too. I feel very uncomfortable coming out to my crush. I don’t know her well enough to know how she’s respond. If I get know her and she turns out not what I thought she was then I will move on. And she’d never know how I feel. |
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#7
Feb 16, 2018, 09:24 PM
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Quote:
__________________
What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
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#8
Feb 16, 2018, 11:33 PM
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Its hard for me to respond. Do you know how this woman feels toward you? Are you okay if it isn't mutual. Uncertain if you want to be lovers or friends. Not judging you. I think you need to decide , if you didn't beforehand, what kind of relationship you want with her. Plus remind yourself no guarantee it will be reciprocal. You might want to decide how imporant your Ts opinion is here.
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#9
Feb 16, 2018, 11:54 PM
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Quote:
Mate don’t judge yourself nor others. Live your life the best way you can and want. Life is too short to let other people take our own freedom of choice. Perhaps the only one we still have, but I do hope you make good choices. Cheers. |
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#10
Feb 17, 2018, 01:10 AM
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How much do you think your T is a good fit for you as a therapist? To me, it sounds like your T may be homophobic and she is responding in a biased way. If your sexuality is something you want to discuss in therapy, you may be better served by an LGBT therapist or at least a therapist who has more experience with LGBT clients.
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#11
Feb 17, 2018, 05:27 AM
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What’s the age difference between you two? If it’s like 30 years that could be a bit much lol
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| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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