[ShadowGX]

"Significant other" in this case meaning someone you've been with for long enough that you're sure this is the person for you. You're either married or whatever you've agreed upon as the "end goal" for the relationship, whether that's "just stay together" without marrying or whatever else it might be. You're past all the intro stuff and you're looking to or already have built a life with this person.

If you're comfortable with it, I'm also curious what your diagnosis might be and if you could describe how the relationship progressed for you beyond the initial meeting throughout your mental health issues and when you both decided to stay together.

Also if you're comfortable I'm curious the age you met your significant other and how long you've been together.

Whatever info you can share may be helpful. If you'd rather PM me instead of post publicly that's ok.

I'm writing this in hopes of finding people here who might have had it worse than or similarly as bad as me but still managed to find that special person for them, hence the reason for a stricter requirement on how committed the relationship is. I'm uninterested in casual relationships myself so don't want to base anything off of them. I see a few of you with your diagnosis either in your signature or posted somewhere else and some of those things must be so hard to manage, yet you still managed to find someone. If you can, maybe I can too? I've basically isolated myself IRL because I generally dislike people and how they treat me, so I've been socializing online only. Despite my hobbies being quite similar to guys and getting along really well with them, the good guys are never interested or already claimed - only the wrong ones ever like me. I'm not sad about anyone that I've lost because they've all been wrong for me. I'm just sad that I haven't found anyone to keep and I feel like I never will because what I need doesn't seem to be out there, and when it rarely is it's either already claimed or doesn't feel the same about me.

Side note: I'm not looking for any advice on the matter, just your personal experiences. I'm already doing what I can, I just need hope is all. =\

[Raindropvampire]

I'm diagnosed with C-PTSD, Bipolar and ADD. I met my husband through his mom who was the newspaper carrier at the gas station I work at. She took a pic of me and he saw it on her phone and wanted to meet me. I was 31 when we met and he was 36. We have now been together 10 1/2 years married 10 years as of Feb.

I told him up front about what I was diagnosed with and he said "Thank the lord. I have PTSD and Bipolar. We'll get along fabulously."

They have since changed his diagnosis to Schizoaffective, ADHD and PTSD. It hasn't all been roses and hearts but it works for us.

[Erebos]

Due to my drug habit and medication I am undiagnosed but am being treated for symptoms of social anxiety, complex ptsd, dissociative disorder, drug addiction, and a plethora of other mental health issues.

My partner is straight (as in t-total)and sane.

We met online gaming, been together 2 years so far, and I don't see us ever separating, we slot into each other's lives too well.
We see each other once a week plus one weekend a month.
I like things this way, keeps anyone getting too clingy.
He has a sketchy past which I have accepted wholeheartedly.
He doesn't understand my issues but he doesn't judge me either, he is,always ready with a cuddle if I need one.

We do ok.

Met in high school 20 years ago. Became best friends and it rolled from them. We have been married 12 years. It is not easy given my mental health and the fact that he is without any issues, but we make it work.

You've read from me posts about being careful with on line dating and relationships. Well guess what people, where did I meet my partner? Yep, on line.

We were introduced by another mutual friend, so striking up an on line friendship didn't seem to leave me so vulnerable. Besides, we met rather quickly.

[ShadowGX]

Thanks all so far for the stories.

[~Christina]

Met in a chat room LOL

We were just friends for a few years before we decided to be more, we both were scared it would ruin our friendship , it all worked out..,. been married 15 years.

[TishaBuv]

We met at a popular business-district happy hour bar. I did not have any mental health issues and was 26. After 25 years of marriage, I have been diagnosed with a few different disorders from different psychiatrists. The reason I went to them was all because of the dysfunctional relationship with my husband and the emotional toll it took on me. We are now divorcing.

I’m not sure what you can take away from this. Did I have a diagnosis lying dormant within me that the marriage surfaced? It takes two to tango though, and he sure did his part to torment me!

You just never know what you are going to get until you get it. Just trust your feelings and take a leap of faith when you find someone you love.

[ohmydaisy]

Originally Posted by ShadowGX

"Significant other" in this case meaning someone you've been with for long enough that you're sure this is the person for you. You're either married or whatever you've agreed upon as the "end goal" for the relationship, whether that's "just stay together" without marrying or whatever else it might be. You're past all the intro stuff and you're looking to or already have built a life with this person.

If you're comfortable with it, I'm also curious what your diagnosis might be and if you could describe how the relationship progressed for you beyond the initial meeting throughout your mental health issues and when you both decided to stay together.

Also if you're comfortable I'm curious the age you met your significant other and how long you've been together.

Whatever info you can share may be helpful. If you'd rather PM me instead of post publicly that's ok.

I'm writing this in hopes of finding people here who might have had it worse than or similarly as bad as me but still managed to find that special person for them, hence the reason for a stricter requirement on how committed the relationship is. I'm uninterested in casual relationships myself so don't want to base anything off of them. I see a few of you with your diagnosis either in your signature or posted somewhere else and some of those things must be so hard to manage, yet you still managed to find someone. If you can, maybe I can too? I've basically isolated myself IRL because I generally dislike people and how they treat me, so I've been socializing online only. Despite my hobbies being quite similar to guys and getting along really well with them, the good guys are never interested or already claimed - only the wrong ones ever like me. I'm not sad about anyone that I've lost because they've all been wrong for me. I'm just sad that I haven't found anyone to keep and I feel like I never will because what I need doesn't seem to be out there, and when it rarely is it's either already claimed or doesn't feel the same about me.

Side note: I'm not looking for any advice on the matter, just your personal experiences. I'm already doing what I can, I just need hope is all. =\

Hi.

I've been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, attempted suicides in the past. I have an emotional disconnect and currently relearning things of that realm in therapy. My partner has similar diagnosis but has also been sober from drugs for 5 years as well.

We met on Tinder of all places. I went in thinking it wasn't going to a long term thing because I wasn't in the mindset for a relationship. We were pretty honest about a lot of things on our first date. We played the 30 questions game and I asked difficult questions like "what's the worst thing you've done to someone" and he answered honestly, which took me by surprise. Most people don't like showing negative sides of themselves, so I was intrigued.

I let him know of what I've struggled with and my mental health past. Not all at once, but it was told in the beginning of the relationship.

We're at a year now and having that open line of communication and of our past, it's the strongest relationship I've ever had. There's a level of understanding and compassion, and a desire to get better.

I'm 32, my partner is 27. We've talked about future plans and it's heading in the way we both never thought, especially the avenue we met. I know that a year isn't that long in terms of relationships, but it feels we've been together longer. A weird sense of having known each other for a long time.

He's very patient, as am I. That helps a lot. Since he knows and has an understanding of what I have and am going through, it's been a really supportive relationship. In the past with other people I've been with, the common phrases were "just get over it", "you're being too sensitive," "you're being ridiculous," "your mind is weak," etc.

Dating is hard. Like I stated earlier, I usually go into it thinking it's not going to be a long term relationship and don't expect it to work. I tend to stay honest with what I have and struggle with. Sometimes it makes eliminating asses easier.

[WasabiAlmonds]

Met my fiance in the park. He went old school and just came up and talked to me.

I was more confused than anything else but it worked.

[AbsurdBlackBear]

I grew up with depression and social anxiety most of my life and since then always felt like there was a wall separating me from anyone I ever came into contact with even my parents and siblings. Even when I was in relationships before I still had this wall and still felt alone deep down and still struggled with my depression and social anxiety.

I met my fiancé on the PC chatroom. At the time I use to try to make friends by talking to new members whenever I saw someone I didn't recognize on the PC chat because I didn't feel comfortable talking in the chat room as a whole with everyone who was active due to my social anxiety. I just said "Hi" to her and then she took a little while to respond because a random stranger saying "Hi" to her on a chatroom freaked her out. By the time she responded I was off watching youtube and did that for hours so by the time I looked back she was gone haha. We did start talking shortly after that though and became best friends fairly quickly.

She told me she would be my wing woman to help me find a girlfriend. I was skeptical by this point of ever finding my significant other and doubted I would ever get married. We were best friends for a year and she was in an abusive relationship. By this point I was starting to fall in love with her and tried to distract my mind because she was planning on getting married to the abusive guy and I didn't feel like I ever had a chance being with her anyways. Something I should add here is I have avoidant personality disorder with dependent features which means that I have a fear of being alone yet I avoid social situations and avoid letting people really get to know me and always keep a wall up so I don't rejected for who I really am deep down and relationships up to this point were always about me trying to not feel alone up to this point. At this time though I was realizing how my illness effected me and starting to come to peace with remaining single the rest of my life if that was the life meant for me.

So back to the story. My best friend got sick of being abused so she decided to leave her ex and we started dating. Things were completely different than my previous relationships though. There was no feeling of hiding, no fear of being rejected, no doubts about the relationship. I just knew it was right. Being with her, my confidence in my self increased to the point where I got my very first actual job and also became closer to my family. Through the job the I was able to make enough money to travel to the other side of the world to see her and we got engaged and being in person with her I felt even more at peace and even more like myself, ultimately just by focusing on her and all my lifetime of insecurities were gone. She truly is has changed my illness as I no longer have depression and my social anxiety has grown more and more non-existent. Not only did I think it wouldn't be possible for me to find my significant other, but I never thought I'd be able to overcome these illnesses. I realize how precious what we have is and there isn't a day I am not happy and thankful to be with her.

[ShadowGX]

@ohmydaisy: I too try to be honest with people about my issues up front, especially when I meet them on a dating site. They're pretty good about saying they can tolerate it, but if I slip up it turns out they're not so tolerant... That or I scare them off after they see what I look like, heh. I'm beginning to think dating sites in general aren't for me, but it's one of the few things I'm able to be out there on so I'm reluctant to stop them even though they make me feel horrible about myself.

@AbsurdBlackBear: That's adorable. :3 Thank you for sharing. Your story about being pretty sure there's no one out there for you sounds similar to me right now. It's a daily struggle to not just hide from the world and give up even though I want it so badly.