I don't know what to think and do

Hi everyone. I need advises from you all...this is about my relationship with my boyfriend of 20 years...we started dating when i was in high school... he is older than me. At first, he seemed hot and very attracted to me. But now, I can feel he lost interest sexually. Why? We haven't done it yet even we've been in a verylong relationship. What seems to be the problem?

Hello wanderingdiva: Thank you for bringing your concern here to PC. I see this is your first post. So... welcome to Psych Central.

I don't know if there are going to be members, here on PC, who will be able to be of help with regard to your concern. Perhaps there will be. However, in order for them to possibly be of help, I think you're going to need to go into more detail. At least to my mind, there's not enough information here for members to be able to offer much in the way of insights into your relationship. At least that is my perspective with regard to your post.

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

What gives you the impression he has lost sexual interest in you?

Furthermore, have you brought this up with him? If not, perhaps that's something you can discuss with him? Loss of sexual interest could have a variety of causes and may not be related to you.

Yes, I agree with ALL the other wise, wonderful posters, @wanderingdiva! Bring it up to him! Ask him why he isn't interested in Sex anymore. Talking things out seems like the wisest option. Based on his reply you can decide what to do. Feel free to come back here when you ask him and we'll try to help you out. Feel free to PM me anytime as well. I'm sure plenty of others will be glad to help you. Wish you the BEST of LUCK with BOTH of your Lives! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH You AND Him, wanderingdiva!

What do you mean by “we haven’t done it yet”?

We haven't have sex for the years we were a couple...I am proud of that. But, there are times specially at this moment... I'm having many doubts in him and myself.

Yes. I don't know how I will say it. I feel shy. These things should never be brought up by a woman I just feel so insecure and unhappy.

Yes. Maybe I am over thinking. It may or may not be related to me. If it is about me and my relationship with him. I am too late. I cant explain how I think and feel... but I am happy to have found PC because I am getting advices.

You haven't had sex in 20 years ... well ... that's a red flag