[whiteroses40]

I'm on a journey to self care after years of caring for the needs of others. I was listening to a podcast on relationships and heard that no one but you can meet your own needs. The podcast gave some examples of how you can meet your own needs but really did not address the need for affection (hugging, kissing, hand holding, etc.). I'm in an affection starved marriage and needed some guidance on how I can give myself affection. What does that look like? I appreciate your help and look forward to reading your comments.

[HowDoYouFeelMeow?]

Sorry to hear of your struggles. Here’s some ways I get affection/body contact as a single person:

Animals: I pet them, kiss their heads, and sometimes they lick or snuggle with me.
Friends: We greet each other with hugs and sometimes ask for hugs on a rough day.
Kids: Some of my neighbor’s kids like to visit with me. They like to sit with me and read books, occasionally give hugs, and sometimes hold my hand if we are walking outside.
Other: Some people like the physical contact of a massage, manicure/pedicure, bodywork in psychology, craniosacral treatment, or osteopathic treatment.

[whiteroses40]

I have two fur babies that enjoy cuddling with me. They keep me sane but sometimes they are not enough. Short of getting more fur babies your suggestions are worth trying out. Thank you!

[sarahsweets]

Have you tried couples counseling? I know its important to love and care for yourself but a marriage is important and affection from our partners is just as important.

[MickeyCheeky]

Yes, I agree with EVERYTHING that ALL the other wise, wonderful posters have already BEAUTIFULLY, MARVELLOUSLY, WISELY AND WONDERFULLY said BETTER THAN I EVER COULD! Definitely seek couple counseling if you can and if your partner agrees with it. Other than that, seek the support of all the people who care about you...friends, family members, neighbours, acquaintances, kids of people you know, ALL the people you can reach out to! We are here for you as well although unfortunately we can't provide physical support... but hopefully we can provide some affective and psychological one at least! Please feel free to PM me ANYTIME if you need advice and support or even simply someone to talk to and vent to! I know it's not a lot but hopefully it's something at least. Remember that you're awesome, you're beautiful, you're kind, you're generous, you're sweet, you're important, you matter, you're worth it, you're WISE and you're WONDERFUL! THAT'S ALL ABSOLUTELY AND UNDENIABLY TRUE AND YOU ALSO KNOW THAT'S ABSOLUTELY AND UNDENIABLY TRUE AS WELL EVEN IF IT'S DEEP DOWN INSIDE YOU! THAT'S A PROMISE! I AM SURE OF THAT! KEEP FIGHTING AND KEEP ROCKING! I am SURE plenty of others will also GLADLY, KINDLY, WISELY and WONDERFULLY help you as well as this thread has already BEAUTIFULLY, MARVELLOUSLY, WISELY and WONDERFULLY shown! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH You, @whiteroses40, Your Family, your Friends, Your Relatives, Your Partner If You Wish, ALL The People You Love And Care About Who ALSO Love You And Deeply And Truly Care About You As Well As Much As You Love Them And Care About Them Who TRULY And REALLY Love You And Care About You For WHO YOU TRULY ARE! Keep fighting and keep rocking! I am SO SORRY that you're hurting and that you're going through ALL OF THIS!