[seeker1950]

to the the old college boyfriend who has written me from California. Some of you may remember my writing about how, when he got the Internet, so we could correspond, he mentioned he had been looking at "porno." Well, I ceased writing to him after that, also letting him know how distasteful I find the whole area of pornography. I really don't think he's into porn, but was saying that to sound cool. I know he has sexual dysfunction, due to his severe diabetes from childhood, and I think/thought he was just trying to sound macho. Nevertheless, hearing from him again, I did and have continued to respond, though the communication is very unfulfilling. This past Christmas, I said I was sending him a gift...one of my treasures, a little sculpture of three Chinese scholars at study. This is the kind of sculpture used in Bonsai culture for decoration, but the artist was a master and I consider it one of my treasures! I packaged it and addressed the mailing box, then carried it around in my car for a week or so....wondering why I was doing this?!!!
This is yet another example of my "casting pearls before swine!" about which I've written here before.
It may sound nutty, but I can actually, lately, feel the spirits of both my deceased parents gently urging me to stop this kind of behavior...to walk away.
Patty

[Perna]

I don't think it sounds nutty that the spirits use one's parents to give us messages; they have to find someone we'll listen to? :-)

Did you tell your college boyfriend what the gift was? I'd maybe still send him something, since you mentioned you were, just something not as personally meaningful to me.

[seeker1950]

Thanks for the response, dear Perna!
LOL, yes, I did tell him I was sending him one of my "treasures," but now I don't feel inclined to do so! There is nothing reciprocal in our communication...me, writing meaningful messages while he responds with news of himself. I've spent over a year doing this, thinking he would come around to replying in a meaningful way, but it hasn't happened, and now I realize it's a waste of my time and emotional energy! It's kind of pitiful, really...a symptom of my loneliness and delusion that someone from my past would ride forth romantically. Not going to happen!
He deserves no gift. He sent me nothing as well.
Patty

[sabby]

Well seeker, there's your answer.....send him nothing like he sent you! LOL

Maybe a quick email to say, I decided to keep my treasure instead of sending it to you and this will be my last correspondence with you as well. It's been nice, it's been real, but it ain't been real nice.

Hon, you are under no obligation to send him anything. He is obviously filled with himself and nothing from you would change that. Put your energies into one who deserves them the most... YOU!


sabby

[seeker1950]

Thanks, Sabby, and LOL

" It's been nice, it's been real, but it ain't been real nice."

Love,
patty

[Perna]

Send him a fake treasure, like he is

[seeker1950]

I'm going to try to attach pics of the sculpture....Click on attachment at top...I can't figure out how to add pics!
Patty

[bebop]

lol I tend to agree with perna! hehe

looked at the pic of your beautiful treasure.. and it is a treasure... and my opinion... is a treasure belongs to a "treasure" - in other words.. it belongs in your home... cause you are the treasure.... not him....

[seeker1950]

Thanks, Bebop and Freewill,
I have the little sculpture sitting under a lamp where it is accentuated for all its preciousness! Glad I unpacked it and kept it!
Love
Patty