[EglantineRose]

So, there is a person who I liked who I have not seen in almost a year now. He works at a place that I used to go to quite often. I stopped going to this place because 1.) I was afraid of being rejected. 2.) He had not really done anything significant to demonstrate that he wanted to see me outside of this particular environment (besides telling me once that he had hoped to see me around.)

As far as I could tell, he did like me. Like I said, he said that he wanted to see me around. He would engage in conversation quite often and ask me how my day was going, what I did that day, etc. However, sometimes he also came across as quite rude and short with me, which was very confusing. Anyways, I stopped going to this place. I have seen him around town a few times (from a distance) and he acknowledges my presence. He also copies my body language (if I stare, he stares, if I turn away, he does the same thing.)

Anyways, even though my feelings for him are still somewhat mixed, I really do miss him and I have been secretly wishing for the past year that I would see him somewhere else. As far as going back to the place I used to go is concerned, I haven't been able to bring myself to do it. I think it would be really awkward given how long it's been, and if he were to act indifferent toward me, I would probably feel very sad. He may even have a girlfriend by now or have lost any interest in me that he might have had. Anyways, he probably thinks I'm avoiding him because I don't like him, when that isn't the case.

Despite the fact that I do miss him and hope he turns up somewhere else again, I'm also very tired of holding onto someone like this. I've had similar 'missed connection' experiences before, and it's very draining. I've been slowly trying to move myself into a place where I'm focused on myself, and I feel like I'm almost there now. I just need some help getting over this guy. In spite of the sadness, part of me wonders if I did what I did for a reason, and that there is a good reason why this didn't work out. He can be moody. Also, our backgrounds are very different in a lot of ways (not like this matters too much, but still..) It just sucks that I have feelings for a person I most likely will never see again.

[poshgirl]

I don't think you ever forget someone who's shown an interest in you. Other people/things replace them, as a higher priority.

Many of us can relate to this situation. A guy has shown an interest, we've reciprocated, only to then see a different type of behaviour. Guys often say "see you later" or "see you around" as it's more casual than "goodbye". They don't realise the expectation it can attract. Of course, the other side is that they know full well what they're doing, so are players.

If you really want to draw a line under this experience, then perhaps revisit the place where he works. However, be prepared and accept that he may have already moved on in the work and relationship contexts. This could act as closure and you move on, you already have doubts anyway.

Hope this makes sense

[Rive.]

Whenever you feel you 'miss' him, I would remind yourself of what you wrote in your original post:

However, sometimes he also came across as quite rude and short with me

Frankly, it seems that you didn't really know him - nothing was spoken and neither of you seem to know where you stand with regards to the other. There are only suppositions and assumptions made. As such, it seems it is not him you miss but a romanticised or idealised idea of him that is not 'real' or anchored in reality.

[EglantineRose]

Thank you so much for your advice. Yes I could try to revisit this place eventually, if anything just for closure. It May hurt if I feel rejected, but since I'm trying to focus on myself and avoid relationships at this time anyway, it's not like I have anything to lose.

[EglantineRose]

Thank you. Yes absolutely. My feelings have always been a little bit mixed toward him. He is also from an affluent family (I didn't realize this at first) and I am definitely not, so I wonder if this could explain some of the attitude problems he has (either that or he has his own personal issues he needs to address.)

[robin red]

you can't just forget someone. need to express your interest, and see. if it goes nowhere you know you have tried. no use thinking you wish you had. but you must be able to move on also afterwards.

[Fuzzybear]