[jesyka]

I’m agnostic for now. I know almost nothing about religion. I was thinking about going to church to learn about Christianity & to maybe be accepted by the people there.

I’m worried about it being like a cult. I’m also worried about being negatively judged & talked about behind my back. I’ve had a very bad experience with a former best friend who told a lot of vicious lies about me to other people including a mutual friend who.

She said that I’m a drug addict for taking prescription medication. She also lied about me being a lesbian which isn’t true. I’m married & asexual actually.

She’s jealous of me as she’s single & lonely. She told more lies too. The other Christians gave up on me after they failed to convert me.

I feel like they might end up being fake & teo faced too. What have been your experiences with people from church been like? I might try exploring Buhdism too as I heard that they’re more open & tolerant of differences.

I’m honestly not sure if religion is for me or not. I just want to try something new. And I want to see if I can actually fit in somewhere for a change although that’s extremely unlikely as I don’t do well in groups at all.

[ArtleyWilkins]

Every church denomination is different. I’d go as far as to say even within denominations, each church is different. There is no way to generalize “all” Christian churches in one way.

Have you researched the various denominations to understand their various practices and beliefs? That would be a place to start since ultimately church choice is about faith practice.

I suspect this topic will be closed because discussion of religion is basically against forum guidelines from my understanding, so I can only speak very generally, and unfortunately this is not a topic that can be easily generalized.

My best suggestion is to do some research about the churches you are interested in. They are not alike.

I think that’s all I can comfortably tell you.

[jesyka]

Thanks. I didn’t know that. How can I do research?

[divine1966]

Originally Posted by jesyka

Thanks. I didn’t know that. How can I do research?

You can google it. Or whatever other search engines you use.

Generally speaking people in churches are just people like everywhere else. Not sure anyone can answer “what are people in churches like”. They are just people. It’s like asking “what are people on the street like”. Generally speaking most people choose religious institutions based on the faith/beliefs they hold but religious institutions also provide lots of community engagement/social life.

Like a previous poster said we could only speak in general terms as specifically religious discussions aren’t allowed.

[mote.of.soul]

I would expect people in the church to be pretty much ordinary people like people anywhere else, everyone is an individual at different spiritual places within themselves... The 'Thou Shalt Not Judge' is obviously still a big focal point for many church goers too, for a reason I would say. It's a reminder.

[Revenge Tour]

The only thing I can offer is be wary of those that profess just how "Christian" they are. My BS'ometer works overtime when people have to advertise or "prove" how Christian they are.

Don't get me wrong. Church has its place. I even go to church. But in my experiences I have found churches are just like any other social gathering. You have your genuine people, your cliques, your "cool kids", your outsiders, etc. It's really just a matter of finding a church your comfortable with.

[Discombobulated]

No one can say what’s right for you here jesyka, I do have concerns that your need to fit in somewhere is the main driving force here rather than genuine desire to follow a faith but only you can know if that’s the case.

As others say churches are like anywhere else, they’re a cross section of people with all that entails. I’m afraid there’s no way of avoiding human flaws in any place where there’s people.

[Fuzzybear]

I think there are genuine people in churches, and in other spiritual groups. There are also others who may not be so genuine (as in any other group of people). There may be some who are less than kind (as in any other group of people). There even may be some in some churches/groups who are ''spiritual leaders'' who have ''a mean streak'' (''mean streak'' was one of The Mother's sayings ) There will be some people there who project their flaws onto others a lot. Some of them, intentionally. There will be others who are self reflective and as kind as they can be (like in most other places)

There will be human flaws anywhere you go where humans go.

[Nammu]

This topic made me curious as I live in a smaller town but there’s a plethora of churches. I know there’s no Unitarian church or Buddhism group here, both of which are open minded and more about social issues than converting a person. So I googled lenient church’s and a list of “laid back church’s near me” came up. You might try that as laid back churches would be less likely to try to convert you. You might try that search. Good luck.

[jesyka]

Originally Posted by divine1966

You can google it. Or whatever other search engines you use.

Generally speaking people in churches are just people like everywhere else. Not sure anyone can answer “what are people in churches like”. They are just people. It’s like asking “what are people on the street like”. Generally speaking most people choose religious institutions based on the faith/beliefs they hold but religious institutions also provide lots of community engagement/social life.

Like a previous poster said we could only speak in general terms as specifically religious discussions aren’t allowed.

Thanks. Will do.

[jesyka]

Originally Posted by mote.of.soul

I would expect people in the church to be pretty much ordinary people like people anywhere else, everyone is an individual at different spiritual places within themselves... The 'Thou Shalt Not Judge' is obviously still a big focal point for many church goers too, for a reason I would say. It's a reminder.

Unfortunately people like that judge the most.

[jesyka]

Originally Posted by Revenge Tour

The only thing I can offer is be wary of those that profess just how "Christian" they are. My BS'ometer works overtime when people have to advertise or "prove" how Christian they are.

Don't get me wrong. Church has its place. I even go to church. But in my experiences I have found churches are just like any other social gathering. You have your genuine people, your cliques, your "cool kids", your outsiders, etc. It's really just a matter of finding a church your comfortable with.

True. The most fake hypocritical Christian I ever knew was my former best friend. She acted like she was better than else. She judged & looked down on everyone who she didn’t like or agree with.

[jesyka]

Originally Posted by Discombobulated

No one can say what’s right for you here jesyka, I do have concerns that your need to fit in somewhere is the main driving force here rather than genuine desire to follow a faith but only you can know if that’s the case.

As others say churches are like anywhere else, they’re a cross section of people with all that entails. I’m afraid there’s no way of avoiding human flaws in any place where there’s people.

I do want to fit in, but trust me, I’m not desperate to do so. If I was, then I would’ve bent over backwards to accommodate other people more which I haven’t. I wouldn’t have blocked & deleted people who used me if I was that desperate to ne liked & accepted, so don’t worry about me.

I wouldn’t have gone almost no contact with my psycho abusive family too. Or no contact with my husbands family.

I really am curious about things.

[jesyka]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I think there are genuine people in churches, and in other spiritual groups. There are also others who may not be so genuine (as in any other group of people). There may be some who are less than kind (as in any other group of people). There even may be some in some churches/groups who are ''spiritual leaders'' who have ''a mean streak'' (''mean streak'' was one of The Mother's sayings ) There will be some people there who project their flaws onto others a lot. Some of them, intentionally. There will be others who are self reflective and as kind as they can be (like in most other places)

There will be human flaws anywhere you go where humans go.

Very true. That is why I have been so reluctant to go to church. I’m afraid of being maniplated & abused.

[jesyka]

Originally Posted by Nammu

This topic made me curious as I live in a smaller town but there’s a plethora of churches. I know there’s no Unitarian church or Buddhism group here, both of which are open minded and more about social issues than converting a person. So I googled lenient church’s and a list of “laid back church’s near me” came up. You might try that as laid back churches would be less likely to try to convert you. You might try that search. Good luck.

Thanks. That’s a great idea!