Did my new aquaintence have ulterior motives?

Sounds good!
Thank you for the explanation. 😀

I don’t know Jesyka but for someone with social anxiety is not easy to do video chats, calls, send pictures… Maybe a pic of a poster with something written at the moment would be helpful with trust if it was his problem.

I think that you should read the whole thread & not just skim through it.

You’re missing a lot. First of all, he’s a creep & a predator. He got mad at me & demanded my pic. I then blocked him. He asked for a video chat & to eventually meet which I said no to also which also pissed him off.

Yes, I read it. First time, I only read your introducing post and I mentioned it. I had not time at that moment and I was more based on other threads about your social interactions.
Yesterday, I read it before writing.
I was only adding information he could have done to test if you were a real person. As a user pointed out that he could have seen you as the scammer.
But, I don’t think it’s the case.

I don’t share your adjectives about him being a creep. It sounds too hard for me but he’s one more among many who try to fish in the internet. And the drama about him being upset for receiving no pics (obviously, I wasn’t present in the situation so I only can speculate but he was just push you to give it a last try).
You did well. I would even bother to block him, unless he kept contacting me.

I wanted to mean in my previous thread that I wouldn’t (negative, ****!) even worry about blocking him up.

Said that, I see you and I don’t understand each other. So, I will save time for both.

I thought you said that you didn’t read everything & that you just read the titkes? Anyways, had a temper. It’s a good thing that I blocked him as he was a creep. What kind of person demands pics?

No. I read your post. Not the other replies. I’ve been having problems in my life, so I couldn’t read all the thread before my first post.
Then, I read all the thread and I wrote another post to reply to one of Nammun’s interventions. About this guy thinking that you may be the scammer.

Sorry to hear about your dog. I just saw your recent posr. Your mom sounds awful too. As for that guy, I was just talking to him.

I have no male friends period right now in my life, not even on here. I’m back to not trusting men again ever. I obviously made a mistake.

I need to be a lot more careful with everyone from now on as it seems like a lot of people tend to abuse & mistreat or at least disrespect vulnerable people That or look down on them for being stupid & naieve probably.

That’s definitely been the case with me personally.

It’s quite personal to comment on the gender of friends I agree, and I wouldn’t assume someone has necessarily a sexual motive in an opposite sex friendship. However it sounds like this guy possibly was sexually motivated from the content of his conversation is that right?

He made a few sexual jokes & indirect sexysl comments. It was like he was testing my reactions or something like that, ew He supposedly had a g.f, but maybe tyat was a lie, who knows.?

Yeah this person could have been telling you anything but the jokes and comments do sound like he was testing your reaction.

It is irrational to say, based on this interaction, that men are not to be trusted.

We don’t even know if he is a man for that matter. We can’t make such judgement of entire male population based on anonymous interaction with a random person we haven’t ever met and know nothing about.

Repudiate all men in general only for some negative interactions is irrational and its root is in our prejudices taught since we were kinds.
Everybody have prejudices that we tend to have hidden which rise at moments of tough situations. Rational thinking is needed here, at least to distancing ourselves from these prejudices without denying them but prevent them from influencing our decisions.

Also it’s needed to work on understand a little the others’ behaviours. Only because a man try to attract a woman on the net, it doesn’t make of him a monster.
Then, it’s taking responsibility for our own participation in the even. For example, Jesyca, I think for you it was more a need to experience and experience has a reason. To learn from it. So, you will be more aware of how long you want to go, or find easier to detect red flags. Or even avoid any future similar situation. It’s your choice.

Complaining is good for nothing. You, Jesyka sometimes has a hard time recognising any mistake on your part and when you do it, you use black-white thinking a lot. This is a clear cognitive distortion.
I already mentioned -cognitive distortions-. I would rise this issue up with the student therapist.
When are you visiting him/her?

I thought you could want to give it a reading.

It’s about cognitive distortions. I found it interesting and informative.


https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/...s-202205042738

My past experiences with men have been very negative. At this point, it’s much better to be safe than sorry.

Perhaps you’d see things differently if you’ve ever been sexually assaulted & sexually harassed by men.

What is known for a fact is that full body pics were rudely demanded. And that this individual or group got angry with me when I said no to them. Their help was suddenly drastically reduced in frequency as punishment.

And that this person or group wanted a video chat. And that they wanted to eventually meet me in person. No thsnks. Blocked!

Oh I know it was bizarre. I am just saying that based on this one situation you can’t say that all men can’t be trusted

I was assaulted and I believe Tart shared that she had some bad experiences too so I am aware of bad things happening, but you still can’t say “all men not to be trusted.” Some can’t and some can

Most men you go for friendships or other stuff are not good quality men.

Never allow anyone in your life that is unable to treat you greatly!