Odd Interactions

Hi there. I thought I'd come in here and ask about something that happened last night to me. It's left me confused and it's rather disturbing.

I was out last night and met up with a friend. We were talking and I was informing him of my recent health issues and he just got into an insulting tirade. Not sure what triggered it or why he was offended, he just got defensive and insulting and it closed the night. Then he was outside the restaurant 5 minutes later and behaved like it didn't happen. Truly odd. I'm just wondering if anybody had any insight.

He's an odd guy to begin with. We call him Spectrum. His words and actions have us all wondering if he's all there, but I like to give him some space and think these are one-off situations. But they actually happen more often than I think they do, last night being the last one.

So ya maybe I'm forgiving or forgetful. But last night was truly odd, and I think I need to insert some space in there.

Anybody have any insight as to what could make someone fly off like that?

Cheers

Drinking alcohol can account for that.

If his behaviors bother you, don't spend time with him. There is no reason to. Distance usually helps our tolerance when we do have to be around them.

My dad always had odd interactions with people & so did my now ex husband. I am happy to be away from those behaviors because in the long run they had a negative effect on me & I don't need that in my life & I am very selective about who I hang around with now (My dad died 36 years ago & my ex is 2100 miles away)

Well that's the decision I've made with this guy. He can't be trusted at a very minimum. I'm a bit surprised at how I've been cutting him some slack over the time I've known him. As they say, if you let people show you who they are, they will. I should start paying attention to the signs.

Yes, over the years I have learned to initially observe at a distance & determine frlm that if I want to allow them into my inner circle or not. My life, my choice & I really don't care what it looks like to others. I tolerated crap for way too long. Now I get to make better choices than tolerating people I am not comfortable being around or people who are disagreeable. It is much easier to tolerate some people at a distance where they can't effect your life at a personal level.

Ya I knew this guy for about ten years no and he's always been off. So I gave him a chance. And boom, here we are. But yes your approach is tried and true.

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Originally Posted by PhilMC Ya I knew this guy for about ten years no and he's always been off. So I gave him a chance. And boom, here we are. But yes your approach is tried and true.

Wish I had been strong enough to enforce the red flags I experienced before I got married. I knew something was off but I didn't have the understanding or the words to express the wrong feelings I was experiencing. Lol....wouldn't have given him the time of day now

I agree with other posts here.

Distance yourself for your own sanity at least. It's not easy if you're usually someone who likes to help friends.

We don't have to be all things to everyone, especially when it makes us uncomfortable. My recent topic is not as serious as this but has made me question the value of a friendship

This person specifically has some issues. I think the takeaway from this is that I spent a bit too much time giving while asking why he was so strange. I'm a decent guy but this went too far, hence the post. So that makes this a ME thing. Heh.

Most of us are guilty of spending too much time and effort on friendships where we are giving so much. Hopefully we learn from these experiences, usually as we get older.

Don't beat yourself up about it. You've tried to be a good friend and it can be uncomfortable realising you can't help.

Oh it's not about me not being able to help. It's just that people are like this to begin with and that I should have seen it sooner. Another lesson, I guess.

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Originally Posted by PhilMC Oh it's not about me not being able to help. It's just that people are like this to begin with and that I should have seen it sooner. Another lesson, I guess.

Yes, I found that people were like that & even though I didn't spend that much time with them, I was willing to TOLERATE them when I was with them just to be nice. The rest of the time I did find reasons to not be around them as much as they wanted to be around me. I have become much less tolerant the older I get. People are who they are & if I don't enjoy being around them I don't waste my time being around them

Sounds like how I am now. Good choice.