I had an argument with a friend of mine a while back and he turned out to be a pretty nasty piece of work so i cut off contact with him. But he wont leave me alone; calling me, coming to my house, coming to my school. It is so embarrassing and just annoying. I am having a hard enough time stopping seeing my other friends who he is close to in order to stay away from him but he just wont get the picture. he is trying to apologise but it is just hurting me. He has given me the money to fix my door (the he broke) and has given me loads of presents. i feel like i am being stalked. I have blocked my phone number and am getting a new phone but can only give the number to a phew people incase he gets it. It is not in a threatening manner or enough to go to the police but i just want to forget it all and he wont let me.

[wiertjuh]

I had the same problem. You are doing just fine!! Just dont give him any reaction in the end it will stop. Hang in there!
Lots of love
Wiertjuh

[TaintedGoth1]

You are being stalked...call the police and let them know this is going on! Don't accept anything from him...it will make him angry but you have to give him the straight deal that you don't want anything to do with him. Act cold-hearted...you need to do this for your own safety.

[seeker1950]

I'm sorry you are going thru this, but I agree, it does sound like stalking. You've had to change your phone number!
I was the victim of a stalker which ended very badly. I did call the police many times during this experience, but it didn't help till he had broken into my house with a gun and tried to shoot me.
I don't want to frighten you, but if you are being stalked, you must do all you can to stop it, and follow the advice of the previous post to put an end to it by being cold hearted! Don't have any contact, as this just encourages them, even if your responses are negative...they still just keep coming back!
Once you have made yourself clear in a cold way, cease all contact. If this doesn't help the situation, then contact the police!

[chaotic13]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
hellishlygood :
.....he turned out to be a pretty nasty piece of work...... He has given me the money to fix my door (the he broke).

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

He doesn't seem all that harmless to me. It sounds like stalking to me also. If you haven't already been very direct with him, as in "Look, I am not interesting in your presents. I am not interesting in having anything to do with you. Our relationship is over, I do not want you calling, speaking, or showing up at my work again." If he makes contact with you after that, call the police.

Thanks for the replies. Yes I act completely cold hearted but i think he is worried that i might go to the police on accounts of something he did earlier on. I spoke to him last night (he showed up at about 11.30 pm) and told him that if he bothers me any more i will go to the police and report him. He seemed really deterred by that and went away but i still got an email this morning telling me about he thinks he has 'emotionally come to terms' and 'changed'. he wasn't asking for me to see him or for forgiveness or anything but it is almost as if he wants to keep updating me on his life and it bothers me.

[Timgt5]

What he is doing is an attempt at subtle manipulation, he is trying to instill doubt in you. This doubt in his mind will give him the opening to later fall for his routine once more. Your best bet is to cease all comunication with him. Set your email to block any further messages. IF he mails you anything just mark it "return to sender" and never open it. In time he will get the message the you do not want him in your life.

Best of luck and I hope this helps

TJ

[sabby]

I think Tim is spot on......I would also like to add that if he arrives at your door....it doesn't matter what time of day or night, do not answer the door but call the police and say you have an unwanted person at your door and you are in fear. They will come and remove him from your property. Also, if you haven't done so, keep a diary of the times he has contacted you and the outcome of those contacts to present to the police/court if need be. Having something concrete for them to see helps in determining if indeed he is stalking you and if indeed you should receive a restraining order.

I wish you well!


sabby

[seeker1950]

This last contact...showing up at your door at 11:30 p.m., and then the email this morning, are signs that he is still obsessed with you.
I hope you didn't answer the email, but if you did, let it be the last one!
Follow the advice given here to block future emails from him.
The obsessed stalker can be very manipulative, as revealed in his email this morning, stating he is "coming to terms" with his thoughts, while at the same time...worrying you! These types can even manipulate to make you feel this is all YOUR fault! Don't fall for it, and don't be his victim! Be safe, and call the police if he shows up at your door again.
Patty

[TaintedGoth1]

I agree...my ex did the same exact things...it's still stalking...no matter what form he's using...he's still stalking you.