Help... Please..

I want to stop... my eating disorder...

I am posting here - because I realized to alot of my eating disorder at this point......in my healing.... has to do with hurt from relationships.

Prior to that it was stress... abuse in my past...

and now relationships...so really my eating disorder has improved..

I "sugar binge"... massive amounts of sugar short period of time.. then.. the rest.. won't go there..

Extremely hard on my body... as I am 52...and.. I have got to change..

So..... what do you do when people "hurt" you? Like my son.. he is a wonderful person - really...charming.. outgoing.. employed.. responsible.. respectful..he is 23....

Yet... Mom's day..... no card... my Birthday.. no card... Christmas.. no card...

It hurts... alot.... because I raised him... as a single parent...
and his father was abusive to me.. divorced him when I was pregnant...and.. I help my son...

so... my son is gone.. he hunts... fishes... and there is always a "season" for something.. and it usually falls on a holiday...

and.. suggestions to get together at different times - he is busy...

so....I think.. I am just being too "senistive"....

that I should be grateful.. I have "in all"... raised a decent person..

and.. not do what I did.. a few hours ago...and sugar binged..

so..
when hurt... what do you do???

and with my son
should I just forget.. cards.. and such???

[bebop]

hon I never get cards and such from my son. we are very close. I think it is just the male nature. we as women tend to expect men to be as sentimental as we are but they just aren't like that. please ease up on yourself. you said yourself he is a good man. be proud of that. my son is a good man too. he is 31 now and I know beyond a shadow of doubt that he loves me. heck my hubby don't even get me cards. male thing I think. do I hurt from it? I use to. I have just accepted it is a man thing. ((((hugs)))

[wounded1]

I am what I call a "recovering" anorexic (it's been 15 years). Back when I was really sick, I was proud of having a 21" waist, and not eating anything for weeks. It was only when I got "tired of being tired" that I realized I had to step back and examine my behavior.

We hurt ourselves through food (eating or not eating) because we feel out of control of our lives. I could only stop my bad behavior when I faced the things that made me feel out of control. Like you, it was mostly painful relationships, most with my family. So, in order to finally feel like I had some control, I "had it out" with them and told them how I felt about everything, from childhood until adulthood. Some relationships grew stronger, some didn't change, but I did. I felt for the first time that I took control of the one thing I could...myself.

Tell your son how you feel, I think you might be surprised by his reaction. I don't think most children try to deliberately disappoint their parents, or hurt them. And yes, males do grow up differently than we do, but I think if you make your feelings known, your son's compassion will show.

Please, stop hurting yourself. Food can be as lethal as picking up a gun.