Tony is depressed. He hates his job. We hate our house, it wont sell. He was talking to my daughter tonight and he told her not to tell me cos he doesn't want me to worry but i do worry, she told me cos he flipped at her about something really trivial and made her cry. She's a tough cookie and usually gives it back (she's 19) but he then apologised to her and told her all this. He recently was turned down for a job he really wanted. He is very intelligent and he feels brain dead in this job.

I feel guilty about him being depressed, he has a councellor to help him with the problems caused by my illness (depression ptsd etc) but i feel he finds it hard to open up. This has come out of the blue, i feel guilty cos i'm not working and i feel i should be although i doubt i'd cope right at this point in time.

He has suffered with depression before quite badly. We both want to go bankrupt and start afresh, we would rent somewhere ..... oh why is life so hard sometimes ..... i know we will get through this, we have been through worse together, i just hope we can help each other out of this blah time.

thanks for listening, just needed to get it out really.

I know it seems like i'm a bit like a yo yo at the moment up and down lol .... but life is a rollercoaster, these things are sent to try us

Jin xx rant over

[Rose3]

Thank goodness he's got a counsellor.
That is unfortunate that he doesn't like his job very much.
Is there anything that he sort of likes about his job?
At least he has a job! But that is a blow when he doesn't get a job that he would have preferred.
I hope that your house will sell - what could be done so that it will sell?
All the best to you and he and your daughter.

[gimmeice]

((((((((((((((((( jinnyann ))))))))))))))))))
((((((((((((( Tony ))))))))))))))))))
I am sorry that you guys are going through this difficult time, hopefully things start to look up for you soon.

[wanttoheal]

((((((((((((Jinny and family))))))))))))

That's hard. I know for me and my children, we are so in sync with each other that when one of us is struggling, it really affects the others. I'm glad he has some help. Hopefully in time, he will trust the counselor more and be able to open up about what's going on for him.

Is there a possibility of selling the house for less to sell quicker or would you lose money? Maybe breaking even is possible?

Life is a rollercoaster for sure. Hang in there jinny, it's bound to get better.

[50guy]

Hey Kerry,
Nice to hear from you again. I missed you kid! It is too bad to hear about Tony. I know how those things can be, stuck at a job ya can't stand and feeling there is no way out. Being in debt and bills piling up or hanging overhead is no fun either. Then the topper is a house that won't sell. I would be depressed too. Remember there is still hope though as you know. You still have each other and your family is doing ok. That is the most important thing.

I will keep you in mind and send all the good vibes to you and Tony that I can.
Keep in touch girl, PM me anytime.

Eric

[Doh2007]

That's a bummer. I can't think of anything to say except that I care and hope it gets better.

[MyBestKids2]

I feel so badly things are so horrible for you all right now. Poor Tony must feel terrible, and the depression just makes things all the worse.

Keeping you in my thoughts and heart!!



Dee

Thankyou all so much, he is trying to protect me from it all, my daughter made me promise not to tell him she told me, but i need him to talk .... he has a hard job opening up as it is ... we need to get out of this house, with prices here going down there is not much equity in it after debts have been paid, so i think we will hand in the keys and rent for a while. This seems the only option right now ... this house is way too small for teens, their friends and all the instruments my daughter has, a dog, 3 gerbils and friends lol ...... i know we are lucky compared to a lot of folks, and we are still together after 20 years. We've been through so much crap together, this is nothing really. Thanks for listening, love to all, Jin xoxoxoxoxo

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((( jinny and family ))))))))))))))))

[wanttoheal]

((((((((((((Jinny)))))))))))))))

I told him i know how he's feeling. and he has another job in the same company which has made him a bit happier .... he was good to me today i've had a %#@&#! day with stupid doctors in a stupid hospital who are so condescending and have absolutely no idea how to organise themselves .... 2 days of anxiety to sit in a waiting room for an hour on my own til Tony came ...just to be in his room, to make him realise he forgot to book a scan and now i have to go 5 days before we go on holiday this country is just one big f--- up.

jinny

thankyou for your care, sorry, just so peed off right now ....

((((( Jinny )))))

I am sorry to hear. Wish I had words to help.

[sabby]

((((((((((((( jinny & tony ))))))))))))))))

Ok hon....slow down a few minutes...take some deep breathes.....try to relax just a few moments....this goes for both of you

Now, I want you to stop and think about where you both were a year ago. You were facing foreclosure, you were having problems with your car, you were having issues trying to get therapy and meds etc etc etc.

Now, fast forward.......you still have your home, albeit a small one, you have a vehicle, you are on meds, you have therapy, you are all getting some kind of help. Yes, life gets messy sometimes, and things go kaflooey....and it's hard during those times to step out of them and take stock in the big picture.

Remember that in time, things do work out. They may not always work out in the way you think they should, or even in the time frame that you think they should....but they ALWAYS work out hon.

Keep deep breathing.....give each other a cuddle and thank each other for your love, your home, your kids, the food on your table etc etc. You'll all be fine through the trials and the tribulations my friend.


sabby

thankyou sabby and griffe .... i just had the most terrible dream. tony held me so tight. he wouldn't let me go until i'd calmed down. i love him so much. kerry

[sabby]

awwww sorry to hear about the bad dream....I'm glad Tony was there for you and was able to hold you and comfort you. I hope you can get back to sleep soon.


sabby