I am getting married!!!!!!

I am so excited and nervous at the same time!

(grinning from ear to ear)
He is a great guy. I love him more than I can say. He is my best friend, pays lots of attention to me and my needs. He had always been there for me (as I have for him), when dealing with ex and kid stuff. We share a great deal of the same interests. We have fun together. He makes me feel beautiful, sexy and loved. He is great with my teens. (maybe because they are closer to his age than I am) Kids love him, although they are still having a hard time with the divorce.

We have been together for 3 years. He has been wanting to marry me for 2.5 years.

Why am I nervous?
First off, he is 17 years younger. I am in my 40's he is in his 20s. We don't see age difference, but I am not getting any younger.. (that makes me insecure) However I do look a lot younger than I am. Most think I am in my early 30s. (I have always attracted much younger men because of this). He also looks younger than he is.... so that brings on lots of stares and gossip. Sometimes cute girls will flirt with him, thinking I am his mother or older sister. But he is quick to put his arm around me and give me a kiss. (how sweet, tee hee) Then there is thinking about retirement and such. Sometimes we talk about kids... We both want to have one together, but we both know there are risks.. and we will already have 5 between us. yikes! But I love his kids so very much and we are trying to get custody of them from their abusive mother.

Second, my family (as in parents and sister) knows he is a friend, but I have never came out and said anything about us as a couple.... I fear what they will say. I am sure they suspect. Dad has already mentioned that he wasn't good enough and was probably out to get what I have (which isn't much, and bf makes more $ than I do). Then again no one is good enough for his daughter. lol How do I tell them I am getting married.... ummm by the end of the month. Why so soon? He will have his daughter and we want here there... it's a timing thing, mine will be gone for 6 weeks). When they get back, she'll be gone till next summer.
Third, I almost lost him once because he didn't think I wanted to move on. He gave up on me. It lead to something I don't want to talk about because we have worked through it already. (had to mention it)

Congratulations! I hope that your family and his will be supportive of your marriage.

His parents passed away when he was a teen. but his sister and brother are very supportive. I think once I tell mine, I'll feel lots better. Not today though, we are going shopping for rings. I don't want to take any chances of spoiling my happy day today. tee hee hee

Congratulations on your marriage. I am new here but wish you the best on your upcoming wedding.

Age makes no difference to love.

Love doesn't see age... but others do. One of my weaknesses ... I tend to care too much what others think. Just brought up that way.

getting even more nervous.... yet still excited.

My 1st marriage was so bad... Having thoughts of the worst this morning... My mind is going back and forth between happy and scared.

Anyone else get nervous with 2nd marriage? Advice please.

I wasn't nervous, but I was hesitant. He has a child from previous marriage and so do I (both were 4 yr old boys at the time, now 11). It's hard having step families, there are a lot of obstacles you have to deal with that most people don't have (but you already have a tast of that). I doubted my decision a lot, but always hung in there and still do. I doubt for other reasons too not just the children, (my husband is disabled sometimes I get depressed that my love life is over that I'm to young for that (33)). His ex-wife leaves us alone now she was a real thorn in our side for the longest time, court proceedings always made me anxious, I hated them. It sound like you already have a pretty good handle on that, you'll be fine. The best of luck to you and congratulations.

Told my sister. Although she said it was up to me and would be supportive, she thinks he is too young and I haven't dated anyone since the divorce but him. Also that he has too much baggage.

She also compared him to someone else I really loved but didn't really date. She said she doesn't hear the passion as with him... but I think there are other reasons for that. I told her in ways what I have with my fiance is more and better.

She said if I am nervous or have any doubts I shouldn't get married.

She thinks it will be a mistake.

I was going to tell my parents at lunch today, but I have heard enough for one day.

That's a shame, I know how hard it can be when your family doesn't approve. Even though you're an adult their opinion matters. I'm 33 and my Mom still has a strong hold on me. If you really need an honest opinion from someone. Don't ask someone who is in yours or his family. Ask someone who knows the both of you mutually "20/20 vision" (if there is such a person). Or maybe ask a councilor if you are compatible (I think there are councilors for pre-marriage (there are councilors for everything)) . A lot of churches will council you before you get married too, if you are that concerned about it. Good luck and don't let your first response discourage you, sometimes I think negative feed back will help you discover if this person is really for you and make your relationship stronger. Once your family sees how committed you are, they'll come around.

Thank you. I really needed to hear that. I had to sit through lunch with my parents and a heavy mind.

His employer is supportive, actually volunteered to marry us. His family is supportive, sis tells him to treat me good "or else". His daughter adores me. Tells me she wants 2 mommies... me being one.

I feel like a wreck at the moment.

I am like that with my sisters. I actually disapproved of her husband and demanded him get out of our family, and it caused big problems between me and my sister and drew them closer together (I was wrong, I should have kept my mouth shut). But she's my baby sister and I felt that he was not treating her right (she was crying to me just about everyday). Any way that was last summer and since then our wounds have healed and she's my best friend again. Her husband straightened up and got his act together (I can't take credit for that). I'm a very over protective oldest sister and it's just part of our makeup (mine anyway). My Aunt calls me mother hen. Your sister's just worried about you, she doesn't mean any harm.

I know, I am not angry at her, just disappointed a bit. She is my best friend. I guess I fear just what you said happened in your family. I don't want to lose her.

What she thinks means a lot to me. I can't stand the thought that she thinks I am being stupid.

It all came as a shock to her in one call.
Surprise... I have a BF
Surprise... it's my much younger friend
Surprise... we're getting married

A lot to take in.

Oh, I have made that mistake! I never liked my brother's wife. After seven years of marriage, he called me (on his birthday of all days) and told me they were getting a divorce. Well seven years of holding my tongue was enough, I gave him my opinion of the woman. He was shocked, I'd never let on my true feelings and I'm not usually one to keep quiet.

A few month's later he calls with a surprise, they're getting back together. It was Easter morning, he asked "she's right here, do you want to talk to her?" Foot in mouth "no, I haven't even had a cup of coffee yet, I'm not really up to it yet." He had me on speaker phone! Now they both knew!

I'm sure that your family is just concerned about you, and that once they see that he treats you well and makes you happy they'll come around.

We're close but not near. She doesn't live near me. We only see each other once every couple of years... but we talk on the phone several times a week .

congrats congrats congrats!!!!!!