[Bleah]

I recently signed up with yahoo personals and of the small handful of people who have contacted me, two of them now say they're in Nigeria "at the moment" (even though their personal ad lists them to be in a U.S. town) and sound to be full of crap. I didn't catch on until the second or third email.

After my divorce I felt pretty settled in being single possibly forever, because even good relationships are a lot of work, but its been a few years and I thought I would test the waters with online dating. Now it seems I will never, even find someone.

[be_be]

Im with you on that one. Online dating is depressing. Ive tried it. I started in October. The last 2 months have been hell. My mistake was that i choose the first guy. Im tall, and he was really tall - the odds of that happening were so silm, he was cute and made me laugh and i didn't keep looking. He turned out to be a jerk. I believed everything he said.

There are probably genuine people out there... im seeing someone else now from the dating website but not counting on anything this time. Theres no exclusiveness - they still go on their and chat up the girls. To me the point is, pick one, see if its anything, if no, then go back... why have 5+ on the go!

Do you have to pay for yahoo personalls? if no, maybe try one that you have to pay for... if someone likes the look of your profile they will pay to contact you. i didn't think it at the time, but i do now, they seem just a bit more legite if they have to fork out cash to email you.

ive been hurt. the first guy i went with, he ended up being my first everything, i tottally regret it. he wasn't the man i thougth he was. its killing me, but i know there is someone out there for me, who will treat me right. there is someone out there for you too. i know its hard to believe it sometimes. i have my ups and downs. right now im wishing i never met this one, but if i never met him i would never know what i know. i have my mometns of clarity! lol. it disapears sometimes tho!

big hug for you!!

[christyv]

Bleah,
I've tried online dating before and ran across this same type of thing. I think that some of the people that post profiles who are actually out of the country are either simply looking for a penpal or possible trying to scam you in some way but talking to you for a certain time period and then asking you to send them money so that they can take care of "this or that". I would drop contact with those people right away but continue to use the site and talking to anyone that seems interesting. It's pretty easy to get a sense of who someone is online if you ask the right questions. And if you decide to meet somebody ALWAYS do it in a public place (like a restaurant).

Good Luck!
~Christy

[skymonk]

I'm not one for personal ads-it's too easy for people to lie&cheat. Remember all the stories you hear about women finding out that their hubbies are having online "affairs." I know it's hard to network especially if you're no longer in high school or college. I do believe we all have someone out there that we're meant to be with-it's just REALLY HARD to find them. Take it slow-nothing good happens instantaneously or in a very short period of time. Watch out for yourself if you meet anyone personally&listen to your gut feelings when contacting anyone. Your gut instinct is your best BS detector&usually puts up lots of red flags-you just have to pay attention to them. Good luck&don't let anyone burn you-you deserve better.

[lattie]

Originally Posted by skymonk

I'm not one for personal ads-it's too easy for people to lie&cheat. Remember all the stories you hear about women finding out that their hubbies are having online "affairs." I know it's hard to network especially if you're no longer in high school or college. I do believe we all have someone out there that we're meant to be with-it's just REALLY HARD to find them. Take it slow-nothing good happens instantaneously or in a very short period of time. Watch out for yourself if you meet anyone personally&listen to your gut feelings when contacting anyone. Your gut instinct is your best BS detector&usually puts up lots of red flags-you just have to pay attention to them. Good luck&don't let anyone burn you-you deserve better.

That is VERY good advice from skymonk. Dont ignore those!!!! I did. Foolish me!

If you gut says something is wrong, then theres a pretty good chance. Go with it, not your heart.

If there is a red flag, or something doesn't add up - DONT ignore it, or make up excuses for them, or give them the benefit of the doubt. Either confront them or just remember it. Dont forget it!