 |
| FAQ/Help |
| Calendar |
| Search |
|
#1
Jan 28, 2009, 01:30 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
My husband seems to need to know what I'm doing every second of every day. When I get to work I have to call him, on every break I have to call him, on my way home I need to call him. My job doesn't always allow for breaks at a certain time or leaving at exactly the same time every day. When I have to stay even an extra 5 minutes he gets upset.
When I told him I signed up here he got upset that I might be talking to other men. He says that every other relationship he has had ended with him being cheated on. One of his brothers had an affair that started with on-line encounters and he is suspicious. He is very suspicious of therapists and counselors but I thought this would be a good way for me to meet some people who may be able to help me work through some things on my own. We are both under a lot of stress at the moment and I need support. He doesn't want me to be constantly crying but doesn't want me to be in a tempting situation. I can't win either way. Anybody got any ideas? |
|
#2
Jan 28, 2009, 01:53 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Yes, too too controlling. (Sorry, just my opinion). Invite him to join here, too.
__________________
____________________________________ "We can't talk at the same time! It doesn't work like that! I talk, you talk, I talk, you talk!!" ~ Peanut 
|
|
#3
Jan 28, 2009, 02:10 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Yes, I agree... way too controlling. You have to have trust for a relationship to work right. jmo...
__________________
"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
|
#4
Jan 28, 2009, 02:25 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
It sounds like he's got serious trust issues. Can'tstopcrying had an excellent idea, have him join so he can work on those issues too.
__________________
I've been married for 24 years and have four wonderful children. |
|
#5
Jan 28, 2009, 02:47 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Hmmm.
Sometimes, well from what I have seen, people hide things that make them controlling. It could be something that is making him paranoid. I may be wrong, but it is something to consider.
__________________
"A life unexamined is not worth living" :speechless: |
|
#6
Jan 28, 2009, 03:17 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I have a co-worker who oversaw his wife so much that she left him. One day she went shopping at the mall when he didn't expect her to do that - he took all the bags back to the mall and returned everything.
The more controlling (and add in some "nagging" too) the more the partners are pushed away. His control issues are fixable - just need some marriage counseling to bring it out and fix it. In that counseling - you have to stand your ground and say "your control issues are hurting me - I do not want to live under these conditions and you must change that." Establish a proper boundary and you may be able to make it happen. If he steps over boundaries, I believe that is one aspect of a failing marriage.
__________________
How can anyone be enlightened? Truth is after all so poorly lit. -- Neil Peart |
| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
|
My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
Linear Mode
