[selfy]

i still miss him.

and i still love him.

and they wont leave me alone.

[AAAAA]

(((((Selfy)))))

[selfy]

i wish i hated him. i honestly do.
it hurts because i still love him and always did, alot.
and to be honest. he doesnt really give a damn and never did.

it would be ok i guess if i didnt really care about him much, but i did. i trusted him too.

and now ive gone and ****ed everything up because im embarrassed to be the cast off as usual. but hey it shoulda been expected.

it doesnt help that the one i was shrugged off for is intent on making my life hard by being in my face all the time with him, when i asked them politely at first, to give me some space. therefore i exploded, not unexpected, as it was the reason why i didnt want to see them.

im always in the wrong here, and im trying to make sure i dont go all paranoid on people and start to think everyone hates me, because its the type of thing id do, and when i do that i push everyone away from me.

its frustrating because im expected by tia to just get over it, as if it is that simple. obviously, she has no comprehension of what i felt and still feel, as by nature tia is coldhearted.

i just miss him like buggery and im sure id be able to cope if she hadnt just jumped right in there as soon as possible, meaning i had no time to get used to the idea that i was just upgraded.

nice to know friends care so much that they consider things like this.

[AAAAA]

(((Selfy))) you don't desire hate. If you hated him he'd eat you up more than he does now, it would take much longer to move on. They both treated you poorly but that is their downfall not yours.