[prettyjolie]

So.. I'm 19yrs old, married for 6 months to a military man. I know, fun fun.

We've been together nearly 2 years.. I know.. people think we're too young (he's 20).. oh well =) Anways, since I was a little girl, I've been taught that sex is bad or some type of sin. I've never seen my parents kiss.They showed me affection but never did they show affection towards each other.
I love my husband, but lately it seems like something is wrong. He's acting weird. He isn't as affectionate as he used to be. He used to cuddle with me, hold me.. every day.Now, he sits across the room from me. =/
We used to have sex often, like every day.. sometimes more than once lol.. yes, we're young. haha.
But ^^^^^ and now it's more like once a week. He doesn't approach me anymore or compliment me anymore, like he used to. I think my parents ideas had a great impact on me because I even though I want to have sex with my husband, I don't enjoy it like I should.. u know.
He said that he wants to "spice up our love life", but I'm a little scared. He's the only one I've been with EVER. I'm scared.
I don't even like being naked. I'm 5'0 and I weigh 118lbs but I feel so fat. I've lost about 30lbs so I shouldn't feel that way but I do. I feel disgusting.
And he wants me to do all this things! I don't think I would be comfortable doing them even if I was skinny and had the perfect body.
To make things worse--he has talked about famous women that he finds attractive. He's only done it a few times.A long time ago I told him it botherd me and I think it's rude but only a few days ago he did it again.
Maybe it shouldn't bother me but how am I supposed to be able to be comfortable with my body when he tells mevthat he's attracted to all these tan, fit women with beautiful hair and straight teeth??
He kind of gets mad when I tell him to not tell me. I don't want to know. It makes me feel like I'm not good enough.
I have to say this.. he's not the hottest man alive, but I love him so much and Im attracted to him. And I know I'm somewhat attractive by wat guys say to me sometimes.
I feel like he should only be looking at me and not telling me who he finds attractive. He's supposed to tell me I'm the most beautiful woman ever. I know I'm not but still he's supposed to make me feel like I am. And how can he say that now??.. like I'm supposed to believe that I'm more attractive than jennifer aniston.. who looks better than me at like 40!

He is very distant from me..I feel like we never talk about anything that matters. When I mention it, he laughs it off/says that we do talk. I like to talk about life, psychology, religion,science.. I need to connect with people in that level..but all he cares about is sports. I don't mind sports but dont want to watch em every day all day.
When i try to talk to him about ANYTHING important or not, he acts like he's not listening.. he's listening because when i complain he's not listening he repeats what ive said. but he makes me feel like I'm talking to myself. He doesn't respond to me. =(
I love him sooo much and I know he loves me too but sometimes I wonder if this marriage is going to last. We already have all these things against us--with the military, we're young, and inexperienced. I want to make it work, but how?
Don't get me wrong. I'm not ready to end it or anything.. but I'm just wondering on how I can improve our situation, especially with the sex/intimacy issues. Is our relationship doomed?
thank you!=D

sorry soooo long.

[AAAAA]

Being a young military wife is very difficult. Hubby and I married when I was 17 and he was 19. He was in the navy for 7 years. We had the added stress of having children right away and working opposite shifts to keep day care costs down.

It sounds like you're dealing with a lot of issues. Have you thought of seeking a councelor? The things your husband is doing are perfectly normal, but you are more sensitive to them because of your lack of self esteem. A theripist will not only help you to be more comfortable with yourself and your sexuality, but with communication issues. There is a difference between listening and hearing.

The brain is the most important sexual organ. Your wish that he should only be looking at you is not only unrealistic, it's unnatural. The man is married not dead. Are you telling me that you don't see Usher and think "he's hot!"

For snuggling, we initiated commercial time as snuggle time years ago. When we're watching something on TV together, commercial time is our snuggle time. You don't have to wait for him to initiate cuddling. Have you let him know that you need more of it?

[I_WMD]

WoW !!!! Jolie ,,,,, you , you , You Married a Guy !!!

But all is not * Lost * [ 'cept that TV show , of the disappear , re appear island ,, LOL . ]

As my sister , AAAAA , said ,, The things your husband is doing are perfectly normal, ....
And Jolie , when he is [ listening ] not paying attention ? ,, With me , that was a " I trust the other is taking care of business ".Now some LOL. time ;

Commercials A R E ,, Great !! >>> , and longer than mmmmm?? say 30 years ago .. hehe .
Intellectual convos ; ,,, Yes I agree that stimuli in the brain department is cool . Just don't watch too much sports ..... LOL . May lead to cranium-lethargency .
I watch / take naps to NASCAR .... O ? ....and golf .

WMD.

and 1 more thing ... sense of humor , or just a tender response a few mins.Even guys learn this one .