Now I feel shame....

I didn't realise you were male

And yes, I can understand regretting other intimacies.

I found out at my sessions this week my T is going on a trip soon and my reaction was not the best, I realize how much this "love" is coming through and it's getting so hard to try and "erase" and control. Ugh... what is wrong with me? Why can I not allow myself to love a human, even in a platonic, casual way? The shame is just so high and I really don't think he can ever know. I'd feel incredibly dirty.

I just want to go back to only loving dogs.... sigh....

dogs are fantastic companions!

i got my first dog a few months after ending a long term transference fulled turbulent and chaotic T relationship and it was the best thing i could have ever done. wish i would have gotten a dog long before i ever started therapy or that my ex-T may have suggested it because i find the unconditional love and time spent with my pup far more healing than any therapy relationship could ever possibly achieve.