A spiritual Conundrum

I returned to it because I thought I was being called upon by a higher power. And thanks for your suggestions!

Pleasure. If a higher power or truly a highest power wants your attention, then there is no door that can stop it, right? A knocker would be helpful though I guess. But I do believe it would be bearable, no? The hindus have a period in their vedas where prophets no longer received direct messages, but instead memories that I should be much less brutal.

Have Hope
I will continue to pray for you. If you have read my posts on this forum (Sanctuary for Spiritual Support) and on the social group forum (At Jesus' Feet), I hope some of these more recent posts convey that there is only one person who can help us overcome these dark powers you speak of.

I never channeled but I do believe that in addition to angels of light, there are spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Sometimes these wicked spirits pose as angels of light. Wicked spirits only want to steal, kill and destroy, IMO this is why channeling can be so dangerous.

I agree that many of our psychological issues are spiritual or can be overcome through one person. Yes, some of our issues remain with us for the rest of our lives because IMO there are laws of the universe still at work and our actions do have consequences but we can overcome the confusion and fear that plague our minds by looking to the one who created the universe, It doesn't always happen overnight but IMO we can be changed and healed. I once did not always follow my heart and what I knew in my heart was right because I was fearful and codependent (we can be more easily gaslighted when are plagued by this type of thinking), but now I see the actions of others more clearly (not that I understand their hearts in every way, only God truly understands our hearts).

So I do agree that your insight that you are in a spiritual battle is correct and I will continue to pray for you. It is dangerous to think we can fight these spiritual battles but we can ask God to fight them for us.

Thank you @TunedOut.

They did pretend to be Angels of Light. They fooled me and now I'm dealing with some pretty major issues as a result.

They are most wicked. It frightens me.

Thank you for your continued prayers.

I don't know why this occurred. I started hearing "voices" after an attempt in 2008. Initially, these voices were all dark. Then, later I thought I was talking to God's Angels, who gave me joyous smiles and positive words and affirmations.

I don't know why I started to hear voices, but I interpreted it to mean I was to use this gift to help others. I interpreted it to mean that I could hear both the dark and the light, which has been my experience to date. And not just auditory - I experienced the dark and the light physically too.

Now I wonder if my brain chemistry had also changed, back in 2008, and if that's how this all happened.

I am closing this part of my life off. After 13 years, I have to. But I do not understand the WHY.

I mean, now I have to be on some pretty strong medications to drown out the voices. And I still experience the physical part of channeling -- I have to cast out the dark by means of prayers. I had an exorcism done on me last weekend, and sounds came out of my mouth as they exited. My husband has done an exorcism on me too, and they growl and hiss when confronted and faced by JC.

This is sooooo far beyond my comprehension. I just wish I knew why this had to happen.

Now I have to deal with it, physically, mentally and emotionally and it takes away from my quality of life.

I am very sorry you feel this way and very much encourage you to never try this again <3

@AliceKate, thank you. For certain I am never trying this again.

Right now, I am working hard at eliminating what I've let in. What a mistake I made.

I would never encourage anyone to try or to do what I have done. This is no joke.

Wow... yesterday I felt SO much better. I felt like myself again. Then while sleeping something returned and now I am dealing with it all over again this morning. I am exorcising whatever it is from the dark again. This is truly a nightmare.

I seem to be resolving this. I am on a spiritual forum, and someone there was of HUGE help and may have even saved my life!!!

If anyone ever questions whether dark or evil exists in the spirit realm, don't...... it DOES most certainly exist, and I have had a direct encounter, which scared the bejeezus out of me. I will never ever ever ever channel again. EVER.

I have been meandering spiritually for 13 years now.... now it's time to shut it down and remain in my own faith, which is Christianity.

I had an exorcism earlier this week with a VERY experienced exorcist. A LOT came out, including demons and spirits. He spoke to each of them and had them identify themselves by name, age and function. They each spoke through me and identified themselves. We worked on this for one full hour, and I feel sooooooooo much better, though some still persist. He told me we would need another session to work on the rest, so I've scheduled one. He is a reverend and truly knows what he is doing. Some demons said their function was to create mental illness in me. Some were related to abuse I had experienced in my life. One demon's function was to cause my eating disorder, which is what the demon said to the reverend. Others were there to create "alters", or other identities in me, which causes mental illness.

This post may be a bit shocking and hard to believe to some.... but this is what happened. Perhaps it will be eye opening to others on here.

I am still praying for you Have Hope. What you have said is not hard for me to believe and though I do not consider myself an expert, I believe there IS a way to overcome it.

Thank you, dear.

I am now listening to a pastor nearly every morning and am praying nearly every morning before work starts. It is truly helping me to get by right now. The pastor's words resonate with me deeply - his words are of mental and emotional strength and positivity - his words are very comforting and nurturing for me. I am now giving God all my battles to fight. Let go and let God, as they say.

Could it have been a Kundalini awakening? I suddenly became very psychic after some months of meditation over a decade ago now, and while I didn't experience anything near as scary or demonic as you, it was pretty frightening for a while and I experienced a lot of sleep paralysis. It sounds like you opened up to more energy that you could handle and most of it was very negative. It sounds like you've worked hard on ways to manage this and reclaim your power which is amazing!

I think I had a Kundalini awakening 10 years ago, yes. It's not what has happened recently, which was the direct result of channeling angels and spirts, which also allowed in dark spirits, dark angels and dark entities. The good and the bad does exist in the spirit realm, and I can attest to that through my experiences.

I, too, have experienced demonic visits during my sleep which caused horrific nightmares and paralysis. It is terrifying.

And thanks.. the exorcisms resolved it! I have reclaimed my power again, which feels amazing!

I also experienced Kundalini around 10 or 11 years ago, and nothing prepared me for it! I completely agree about the good and bad in spirit, it's not all love and light as some say. I'm so glad you've found your way through this. All the best!

WOW! Similar timeframe! I'd love to hear more about your Kundalini experience... mine was an overpowering and vibrating energy that overcame me and made my body vibrate for 20 minutes straight. Then, I experienced the most powerful and the most ancient wisdom in my third eye that felt centuries upon centuries old. I felt like I was experiencing God's wisdom. I think it was to open my eyes and give me knowledge of something greater. That was my first introduction and experience.

I'm happy to share! I was meditating intensely for a few months when I started to experience energy flooding my body from my spine upwards. My ears got very painful and then I opened up to hearing strange tones and whispering a lot of the time. My third eye opened and I began to experience clairvoyant images in my mind's eye which also continued onto walls when I opened them. I had a lot of scary dreams about spiders and snakes which I know is typical of Kundalini. The worst aspect was the nighmares and feeling as though my covers were being pulled off me while being unable to move. I had dreams about an entity being in the room with me and stopping me from turning on the light switch. It was very frightening and I felt ungrounded especially with the visual images.

wow... that sounds mostly scary.... except for the clairvoyant images. I wonder how you started down this path or whether it just suddenly happened to you. Mine has history to it that led up to this experience. I had basically been channeling for months before it occurred.

In all honesty it was a bit of both. I've always been spiritually minded and drawn to religious and spiritual symbolism even when I was a child. I was never psychic though - that all started literally with the meditation. I've always had very deep and vivid dreams though so I think that's how I connected to spirit from a young age. I'm an introvert with a strong inner world so I think that naturally predisposed me to spiritual experiences. I've also been interested in alternative therapies and spiritual healing and I was attending reiki healing classes a few years before the Kundalini. Were you psychic as a child or did it come later?

Very interesting story! I don't think I was psychic as a child, but I did have paranormal experiences at the age of 8 that I clearly remember.

I, too, have always been interested in alternative therapies and spiritual healing methods. I pursued an energy healing course for one week led by a relative who is also a channel to the spiritual realm. I really did not "open up" to this realm until after an attempt in 2008. At first, I began hearing voices and initially they were all demonic voices. Then I began experiencing a far more positive and loving presence. I had a visit in my room one night, and I felt the most incredible overpowering feeling of love and comfort enveloping my entire room and body. I found out later that it was my Guardian Angel visiting me. I've also done automatic writing, and that's how my Angel introduced himself to me, in writing. I am not psychic per se, but I do have very strong intuitive knowing, a knowing that can predict a future event, so perhaps that is a bit of a psychic ability? My grandmother was psychic, so it seems to run in our family heritage.

Gosh the demonic voices must have been frightening! Can I ask how you opened up to this realm? Sorry if it's in your initial post, I will read it again. The angelic presence sounds really wonderful. I've never experienced anything like that. I would definitely say that intuitive knowing is a psychic ability of sorts. I think there's a clair-something that describes 'just knowing' things.

I've been thinking lately that I want to start meditating with intent to tap into all this again but hopefully not get the scary experiences! I did a third eye meditation last night and had quite a vivid dream as a result. One way I experience things is through dreams - they seem to give me messages as I get significant numbers, names and songs that are very apt when I look up the meaning on waking. None of my family is psychic as far as I know but several family members have a strong interest in spiritualism.

Can I ask how you channelled to start with? (I'm not intending to do the same, just curious if you want to say.) I know there are various ways including writing and speaking. Did you use energetic protection? A friend always talks about this but I've never used it.

I don't suggest channeling without having a mentor and complete spiritual protection. I didn't know what I was doing, I did not protect myself and I had no mentor so I got into a LOT of trouble because I didn't know any better.

My channeling evolved from first having paranormal experiences to experiencing energies moving my body, nodding my head in answer to my questions, which then evolved into automatic writing, and then eventually it evolved to having my own angel guides speaking through me, answering my questions in full sentences.

Again though, I caution anyone against channeling. It must be taken very seriously, and there's a lot of danger involved. I was hospitalized three times because of the evil spirits and demonic entities that entered who scared the living hell out of me.

No it's fine, I'm not intending to do it. I was just curious about how it all happened especially in the context of what I experienced some time ago. I'm glad you've come through it as it sounds truly awful. Thank you for sharing your experiences!