[Dymphna12]

Hi I'm Dymphna and I was just officially diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type.My family expected it, but I wouldn't admit it. Now I don't care so much about the diagnosis, just so long as the symptoms can be treated successfully. I'm really scared about what's happening to me. Sometimes it feels like I have no control over my own brain. I've been through so many jobs, may lose my current job because I can't keep up. I've been homeless once and scared that will happen again. I'm currently going through a psychotic episode, but at least right now I'm still able to remain aware in in reality. I'm scared I'm going to be hospitalized again. I've been hospitalized briefly 6 or 7 times in the last 7 years and have been misdiagnosed several times all these years. I've had nothing but bad luck with psychiatrists who wouldn't listen to me. Have a new one now and some hope things will be different this time. I've been sick like this as long as I can remember and even tried to kill myself several times. I'm so worried I will never have a normal life. I'm blessed to have a therapist fighting beside me every step of the way though. She has been my only hope in this whole ordeal. I used to be a very intelligent person and feel like my IQ is nothing now, but she gives me hppe that I can and will go back to college and succeed. Anyway, thank you for reading and for your support.

[Piraeus]

Hi Dymphna12.I love your avatar. That is really cute.
I have paranoid schizophrenia, which is similar to
schizoaffective disorder. I remember being scared out of
my mind when I was hospitalized. I was so paranoid.
It sounds like you are trying your best. That's all you can do.

Piraeus

[worthit]

Having a new doc helps. I've have loser ones but am also blessed to have a T in my corner. It can be scary,but you'll get through this. It sounds like your family can be a big help and support. ((Hugs))

Sent from my VS920 4G using Tapatalk 2

[DePressMe]

Hi Dymphna, I can relate to your feelings. I've been there too--hospitalized, homeless, losing jobs...on and on. This is a hard label to accept but there is hope--we do get better. It's a good thing you have a good T in your corner--that can make all the difference. I hope you keep sharing....D.

[Tsunamisurfer]

Originally Posted by Dymphna12

... I've had nothing but bad luck with psychiatrists who wouldn't listen to me. Have a new one now and some hope things will be different this time. I've been sick like this as long as I can remember and even tried to kill myself several times. I'm so worried I will never have a normal life. I'm blessed to have a therapist fighting beside me every step of the way though. She has been my only hope in this whole ordeal. I used to be a very intelligent person and feel like my IQ is nothing now, but she gives me hppe that I can and will go back to college and succeed. Anyway, thank you for reading and for your support.

Dymphna
I feel your pain.
I hope you have a caring and good psychiatrist who can help you this time. Having meds that have messed you around over the last year can't have helped.
Coming to terms with being different from most people, and struggling to live in a world that expects us to function "normally" is really tough.
I'm glad your T has been so supportive and has given you hope and something to strive with.

I too am struggling with having been intelligent, (yet a different type of intelligence to most people), but seem to be losing ground with cognitive deficits. I don't know if it is compounded by my meds, or if I would be much worse off without them. Regardless, my symptoms are too severe to take that chance. My pdocs hate my frequently fluctuating feelings about this frankly flatulent fault. I'm hoping my T will be able to help me push through my lost feelings and, like yours, give me a handle on better coping with what we have.

Our disorders suck, but we are here for each other. I hope we can be an encouragement to you.
TS