Are they real?

Halloween at my dog's doggie day care: http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?s...9609051&type=1

(My dog isn't in any of the photos.)

I think they did get to me, I missed college. I walked up but I just couldn't go in, I was freaking out in the street. I feel kind of disappointed in myself.

I called my nurse to talk to her - but she was out, but she'll probably just tell me to take my meds, like they did on monday.

Costello - I love those pictures.

Don't be too hard on yourself, Kureha. You're doing the best you can. That's all anyone can ask.

Here's my baby wearing her Halloween bandana:

Thanks - I managed to make it in today - I took my knife to keep safe and it worked a bit, I just don't know how to start a conversation though, so I was pretty quiet, I'd only end up talking about gang stalking - but I tried to be involved.

My ex psychologist is no longer that - I see her in about a months time, I just wish my nurse would call.

Costello - finally can see your picture - I love your dog

Kureha, I'm glad you got your old psychiatrist back. Hang on in there till you can see her again.

Costello, I really feel bad for your son, he sounds like such a lovely young man. I wish he could see himself as you see him, then he wouldn't feel the need to pretend to be someone else.

Yeah she is awesome - I just hope she stayed the same.

I'm not going to post about myself anymore - I'm just going to reply to other people. My nurse gets payed to listen to me whinge about stuff, so I'm just going to tell her -although she never called me.

I really feel like getting revenge on the sleeper cells, they make me anxious - so I should do the same back to them and send a message to them.

The good thing about us though is that we're not paid to listen to you... we listen to you because we're genuinely interested and care about your well being. So don't stop talking on our account... I know I'm always happy to hear from you.

And you don't "whinge about stuff," you're allowed to tell people what's going on in your life.

Best way to get revenge on the sleeper cells is to get on with your life despite them. I know that's easier said than done.

Thanks I think I might just reply to other people for now though.

I want to freak them out like they do to me, I've had enough. They won't lie when I tape the conversation. Then the truth will come out.

We're always happy to hear about what's going on with you and to offer support, but I think it's awesome that you want to focus on replying to others. Sometimes we help ourselves when we help others. Just trying to see things from another person's point of view can be so helpful. And you have a lot to offer here.

I talk about myself too much , so I'm going to shut up. I have my nurse for a few weeks more so I'm just talking to her from now on, I'll miss her though.

I'll present her with my proof though, because it seems like the right time now

I don't agree, but I understand why you think so. Sometimes when we disclose a lot, we start worrying we're boring others or that we're giving too much away.

I do think it's possible to focus on ourselves too much - especially to focus too much on our own problems. It makes the problems seems so much larger. It can be a real relief to put our attention elsewhere sometimes - like the load has lightened a bit.

I always think I'm boring people - I've apologised to my psychologist before for wasting her time.

I try not to focus on it - but they get angry and bring me back to reality, I need to lose my anxiety - I'm looking for something that will do that.

They are no medications to stop anxiety totally.

There are lots of good reviews that legal highs can make me feel better though - there are loads of reviews with everyone saying how great they felt and I want that.

What's a legal high?

I always try to warn my son to minimize the mind altering things he takes. Alcohol clearly effects his mental function. Caffeine. Even the cigarettes. I suspect even sugar and processed carbs effect him negatively.

His mind skitters out of his control too easily. He needs to minimize the chemical mind changers.

Oh, and btw, you're not boring at all. At least not here on the forum.

Thanks

It's the safe alternative to illegal drugs.

I was reading about some and they sound great - everyone that reviewed them seemed impressed - well apart from a few.
I just want to not care about stuff and I've been feeling weird since Wedenesday - so it would probably help with that as well.

I mentioned it to my nurse a few weeks ago - she said I could die, no one else has, so it's very unlikely I would. Just putting a downer on it.

I avoid alcohol always.

She's probably just afraid for your safety. It's too bad she said that to you, though, because it just lowers her credibility. I'm more concerned that it could have unexpected effects on your mental state. And if you're messing with mind and/or mood altering substances without your folks or nurses knowing about it, they might be confused if you start acting different. When my son stopped smoking, for example, he didn't tell me for 2 or 3 days. When I noticed he was becoming very irritable, I worried that his "mental illness" was acting up. Once he told me that he'd quit smoking, I was able to understand why he was irritable and that it wouldn't last long.

I understand what you mean about your son, the good thing about these is they only last a few hours - so if I take them for college a few hours before I should be fine, they seem really safe.

Yeah it's because a few people died taking a legal high, but they didn't know for sure that it was that - but they banned it anyway.

That's the effects -

Typically you will experience:

• giggling at things that aren't funny
• colours appear brighter
• tracers and visual distortions are common
• euphoria

Euphria has to be a good thing

I'm confused. Some people did die taking them? And they're banned now? So they're not legal?

I don't agree with all the drug laws, but I do believe in following the law. Even if it's a very silly law, if you break it, you might end up in trouble - possibly even in jail.

Euphoria sounds great, but I'm not sure it mixes well with attending a class.

My son used to sit and laugh to himself a lot when he was in psychosis. Unfortunately when you do that, people tend to wonder why you're laughing. They also tend to assume you're either crazy or high.

They died taking a certain one - the ones I was looking at are all legal still, I don't want to take the real stuff - because it might not be safe.

Maybe I should try before college - just to see what it's like - then I'll know what to expect. Maybe I could control the laughing.

I might call NHS Direct - my head feels so weird

I decided to wait it out until tomorrow then call if I need too - maybe I'm just tired or it's what they did to me on Wednesday.

All my thoughts of hurting other people have come back as well - well the sleeper cells anyway.

I just feel so weird

You mentioned in another thread that you stopped your meds last week. Is it possible the weird feeling in your head which started on Wednesday is just your brain and body trying to readjust to life without meds? This is why I don't want my son stopping meds abruptly.

Antipsychotics block dopamine receptors in your brain. Your brain reacts by increasing the output of dopamine. When you quit the antipsychotic your brain is flooded with dopamine. That can cause you to feel weird.

I'm sorry to hear you're having aggressive thoughts. Please don't hurt anyone, even if you think they're hurting you. You might be wrong about who's a sleeper cell and who isn't. You wouldn't want to hurt someone who's done you no wrong. And even if they have done you wrong - or are planning to - it's far better to meet your enemy with love and kindness. The people I admire the most would advocate that approach - Jesus, Buddha, Martin Luther King, Jr., Gandhi, Mandela. Love your enemy. Turn the other cheek.

Violence just invites more violence. Anger leads to more anger. Fear feeds fear.

I don't know what is making me feel weird- I've seen so many cameras though today - I got my camera to take videos, but it was far away to see and some it couldn't pick up.

I don't want to hurt anyone, but I want some proof as well and I'm sick of them all. My psychologist always said that - that if I went out with a knife, I'd pull it out on the wrong person and they wouldn't understand.

It must be terribly frustrating. I really think you should leave the knife home, though. It's an accident waiting to happen.

I agree with Costello, don't take the knife. I knew someone in Northern Ireland who used to carry a knife to defend himself from the IRA. (They weren't actually after him, he just thought they were.) Anyway, some guys came out of a pub a little bit tipsy and loud, and bumped into him. He thought he was being attacked and pulled the knife, the guys saw the knife and turned on him in self defense and he ended up not just being stabbed with his own knife and going to hospital for stitches, but in trouble with the police and ending up in jail before being transferred to the mental health hospital.

Really, knives are more trouble than they're worth. People think they know how to use them, but actually, you're more likely to hurt yourself than anyone else. And chances are you might get the wrong person anyway.