Today around 2pm UK time, they sent a doctor to my house. No warning, no letters, no phone calls. I was home alone and I never open the door or answer calls anyway.

But some man dressed like a detective holding several files rang the door bell a million times. I freaked out not knowing who it was. Rang my 1 friend and she rang the crisis team. Turns out it was a forensic psychiatrist from the prosecution to assess me if I am able to go to court! WTF, at least let me know. It sent me into some panic, my mum (mom) eventually came back, also now freaking out cos I had smashed up loads of stuff, my solicitor turned up, the crisis team rang and also the CMHT got involved too.

Then because I didnt open door, the police or whoever sent this doctor, sent a fax to my solicitor that if i dont usually leave the house then why didnt i open the door! I DONT USUALLY leave the house, I DONT OPEN THE DOOR for ANYONE. I didnt say i NEVER leave the house. Making rubbish up about me to get me in more trouble! WTF is wrong with these prosecutors, I HAVENT done ANYTHING wrong. Just LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!

I KNOW YOU ARE READING THIS, GO GET LOST, STOP HOUNDING ME AND MY FAMILY AND STOP SENDING PEOPLE ROUND MY HOME AND DONT EXPECT ME TO OPEN THE DOOR.

[costello]

I'm sorry this happened, Day. They should have been smarter than that. Why couldn't they at least have let you know they were coming?

I dont know. Maybe they wanted me to react. Maybe they knew I wouldn't open the door,so now they can claim I wasn't home. Well they can say what they want, I have CCTV that covers all our house and grounds, no one can come and go without being seen! Maybe they wanted to get me alone to fit me up or make me say something that they can twist into something else.

That sounds really scary. I'm sorry that happened

*Willow*

[faerie_moon_x]

That would be very scary.

If they are trying to prove your mental wellness, why are they coming to your house anyway? Shouldn't you be going to an appointment vs. them going to you. Also, they shouldn't just send anyone without notifying you. I'm sure they aren't pleased when weird strangers show up on their door, too.

[KUREHA]

That sucks, I hate when they don't say they are coming.

I was just getting ready again 1 day and someone kept knocking at the door and I got message from my now ex nurse saying to answer the door because the Dr and police want to talk to me.
She didn't mention it to me when I was talking to her before that.

So I hate when they just do that.

Dark, I can't go out like that. I just can last maybe 10 mins and if there are more than a few people, I freeze and panic and need to go back into the car. So yeah the Crisis team and Community mental health and my solicitor got them to agree to come to the house. They said they dont usually do that , but will in extreme cases. But I DIDNT KNOW. NO ONE knew apart from the Doctor and prosecutors.

Kureha, I hope you are better now, everyone missed you here. Yeah it's bad to just turn up. I never open the door. I didnt even know who this was!

[faerie_moon_x]

I see, I undersatnd. You'd think that not being able to leave the house for an appointment would be a big red flag that you're not able to go to court. They should have called you in advance, being somewhat aware of your anxiety.

[KUREHA]

Thanks, I feel less depressed a lot less.

They really should tell you though.
I always freak out when someone is at the door and I'm not expecting anyone, I usually hide.

[faerie_moon_x]

I hate it when people come to the door. I don't like visitors. I get angry to hear the door knock. I don't like to be bothered at home without a warning.

My aunt who lives next door.... my uncle had some huge anxiety disorder and although they live right next door we didn't see them for 5 years, except occasional "hello" outside. Now, my uncle passed away and my aunt and mother in law are sort of friends. So she always is coming to the door.

I don't like her or trust her and it makes me mad when she visits. I just don't like it. She comes at the worst times, like when the baby is going to sleep! So all the dogs bark. >.<

What the? I NEVER open my door either. I have the window on my door sealed with black construction paper with a tiny little hole for me to peep out of so I can see. Usually when someone knocks and I don't know who it is, I freeze, then tiptoe to the door so they can't hear me in case I don't know who it is and I need to be still until they leave. How rude. Sounds like you did have a bad day, HavingABadDay.

I put up CCTV all around the property, just for this type of situation. I can see who is at the door when they are are here. But I stil go to the highest window I can find and physically look just to make sure they haven't tricked the CCTV with fake images. I will never open the door, one day my dad was locked out and even he had to wait till my mum (mom) came home. I could have let him in, but he takes too long leaving the door open and anyone could come in.

Thank you all for your support.

F$%k we just had a power cut, only lasted 1 second. We have never had one. Why the hell today. A man was also found dead very close to use. That was this morning when a police car went by. Why today!!!!

[newtus]

Originally Posted by HavingABadDay

F$%k we just had a power cut, only lasted 1 second. We have never had one. Why the hell today. A man was also found dead very close to use. That was this morning when a police car went by. Why today!!!!

do you believe in the apocalypse?

what about a personal apocalypse?

personal apocalypse? I've had enough of them to last an eternity

Every day is like a battle and the end of the world. Im either superhuman to get through each day or God is just having a laugh with me.

[newtus]

Originally Posted by HavingABadDay

personal apocalypse? I've had enough of them to last an eternity

Every day is like a battle and the end of the world. Im either superhuman to get through each day or God is just having a laugh with me.

same.
its a daily battle for me.
i feel for you.

perhaps you are superhuman?
like me?

i hold universal secrets.
i thought everyone did.
i found out its rare 2-3 years ago.

i am superhuman.
not by much because it all comes so natural to me....
....yet by average standards its a lot.
a lot more than everyone elses...

I know have a super power, not completed yet. Its something to do with the future. It was all going okay till they started me on meds. Now its all gone cloudy, like underwater. I know its the Government after the secret. This might sound weird thats why I dont tell anyone.

[newtus]

Originally Posted by HavingABadDay

I know have a super power, not completed yet. Its something to do with the future. It was all going okay till they started me on meds. Now its all gone cloudy, like underwater. I know its the Government after the secret. This might sound weird thats why I dont tell anyone.

Mine is future too....

idk though/

are you ME?

its about the govt after the secret yes i know this.
I HOLD PART OF IT

WHO ARE YOU

eh? No Im NOT you. Well I dont think so. I certainly dont have a car like the one you showed!

But I have been told I dont need anyone else , just someone who will meet me, someone from somewhere, not here though. Then they will complete my power, I will save humanity. I know I know, it might sound not real to you all, but I KNOW it is. IT is. I am me newtus, not you. I dont think its possible to be someone else. Im feeling confused now. Let me think this through. I need to think

Originally Posted by newtus

do you believe in the apocalypse?

what about a personal apocalypse?

Terminator 2 - Judgement Day is on.

You see you said apocalypse, and here is Judgement day! WTF

[newtus]

ok just checking....thats all ok?

hm...
this better be coincidental.
because someone will be meeting me too.
although i know who it is.

besides all that part
forget what everyone else thinks
if YOU know - then you KNOW.
you know whats going on
you know what can and will happen.
that is ALL.

some stuff i predicted already came true.

i ALREADY know your not gonna save humanity.
if you run around TELLING people that - yea youll be in hospital too.
dont tell people that...

But I will save them. Me not telling anyone will not change that. Some things cant be changed. Some things can. I cant go hosptail , cos then Im in big trouble. I need to be out. If im not out then what? He already told me DO NOT get hospitalised, thats why I can only divulge certain information and keep the rest to myself. I just had a cigarette that makes me dizzy. I tired e-cigs, but they just make me feel nothing. When i smoke (i am only alllowed ONE a day) they make me think on a different level. I cant do drugs, i need to stay concious. Thats why i keep secret diaries. In them are stuff only me or Him are allowed to see. I cant go hospital ..

Someone left a green dumpster just oppposite. I took a picture but not sure how I could show you. Maybe you have ssen it before.

[RunningEagleRuns]

that would piss me off..

[KUREHA]

My nurse mentioned Terminater when I was trying to explain about what the glasses and contact lenses have now.

[Ash0198]

I have the exact same thoughts. Isaw ur post a while back but decided not to post anything because I thought it was so crazy that u should think the same thing.
I've told everyone about this "feeling" that I have something in me that needs to be 'activated' activated by what and whom I don't know. But I know they're not from here. There was always this place that I've had a huge connection with from a very young age. Always thought I was special and one day I would have to go to this place for my initiation. The voices have told me this and I get nervous just thinking about it. It's seriously freaking the crap out of me that by chance I saw ur post

. I dropped everything because of this feeling. Basketball was a huge part of my life and was something I saw myself making a career out of....I had a personal trainer...was taught by the WNBA coach and assistant coach. I had it all going for me. But this feeling got stronger and I bummed out...this was the time I began to get "sick" - according to others around me.

All of us function on a higher level....this I believe with my heart and soul....but I was afraid of not being believed....that is why put off typing a reply to ur post....if u were to believe me then that would be great to know that I'm not the only one feeling this way....but if u don't then tbh I don't care....because I know it's all true....and so do u.