Roll Call 28

Yeah he sent the protocol but I never received it. We ended up talking a lot and things are resolved now----he somehow decided that he wasn't supposed to ask me questions---what? So basically he was just guessing instead of asking me or anyone else for help....so I explained that I might not be able to answer right away sometimes or that I might be irritated because I already told him the thing before but he still has to ask. Anyway I'm hoping it's resolved.

went to therapy today. wasnt productive because i didnt know what to talk about. so we talked about random things. she keeps wanting me to talk about my mom but i just cant. and she mentioned the topic of masturbation again. but i got choked up on that so i didnt talk about it hah.

anyway i picked up the images of my brain scan. it says on the paper "abnormality of gait".

Can you talk about your dad instead about how you have a harder time when he's not around?

i have but he says i just need to get my life together and do somethigg outside of the house. he cant stop his job cuz i already asked him. my therapist talked to my dad about how ive been hearing voices lately and i got the courage to tell her i felt like hurting myself and then i asked her if she was gonna send me to the hospital but she said she wouldnt. then she said they would just probably send me back and i said "i know because i dont belong there".

idk how to look at the images of my brain scan. the pictures say "unix executable file" and idk what program to use to open them to see them

well its way too hot now to clean my car. its mid 90s. i guess ill do it tomorrow morning before T calls at 11

I don't know either maybe one of the more computer savvy guys will step in but unix looks like an OS so it almost seems like your images are more like programs on that OS. It may just be for your records so you can give it to other docs?

Oh what I meant was can you ask your therapist how to deal with the loneliness of not having your dad there---she might know good ways to meet people etc in your area...

Newtus, do you have a Mac? It seems that Mac computers name any file type they don't know the file type of "unix executable file". It's possible to rename the file to give it a file type but I'm not sure what you'd use. Maybe some picture format like jpg or gif? Make sure you have a backup copy of the file before you try and change anything. You could also open an image reader like photoshop or whatever Macs use to read pictures and going to File/Open and then selecting "All Files" and trying to open your file that way.

Sounds confusing, sorry. Hope you can figure it out, brain scans are cool.

This link might help: https://discussions.apple.com/thread/5575331

My week is a busy one. Today I have a swim test that I really need to pass. And my brother's baseball game. How is your week?

What is a swim test? I never had anything like that--we had to show we could tread water for X amount of time but that is it.

So far watching Bones... The episode about the stripper. It's a shame I don't have a good body and not as out going or I'd so do it.

Oh hey guys long time no see. I kind of abandoned this forum. I haven't had any psychosis symptoms in ages. I stopped taking risperidone because I hated it so much. I had a flare up after I stopped the meds but then those thoughts and feelings stopped. Then I switched antidepressants and then was off and on with that, and recently just stopped taking them altogether. I just saw my doctor yesterday and he knows I'm not on any meds and I feel fine. Well, disordered eating thoughts have come around again after so long. Ugh I've gained so much weight from meds and inactivity I gotta lose weight... But yeah hi again. That's really been it.

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thanks i just installed a program on mac to open the files and it worked. so i saw the pictures of my brain and it looks like the cerebellum goes down in the spinal cord.

Ok maybe this is super weird but would you feel like posting a screenshot of your brain? I totally understand if you don't want to but I would like to see it....

Went to a surprise party today. Had so much fun and for a while I managed to let my guard down for once. Then I had a nightmare on the bus ride home. My dad's fiance had me cornered. She was telling me that he no longer loved or needed me anymore and that I should crawl into a hole and die. Then in my nightmare, I shot her in the head but she didn't die. She got out a knife and stabbed me in the heart repeatedly. Then I woke up to the sound of someone speaking loudly in a foreign language on the bus. Every time she's in my nightmares she's always trying to hurt me. And to be honest I want to hurt her. I know she's got something against me. I know she's out to get me. But my dad can't see it.

ok ill try. i gotta goto the grocery store first and then ill see if i can sccreenshot it

I'm sorry, StarStrike. I've had nightmares of a family member violently assaulting me too. They're hard to shake off. Remember what the consequences of hurting her would be though.

Thanks for that newtus.

Hey has anyone else ever had jaw problems. My left jaw muscle or joints are hurting. It's been like this the last couple of days. I think it might be tmj.

Newtus those are very cool pics! It's so neat to see your brain! Thanks for posting those!

"I'm climbing my own mountain without any safety equipment"

Thanks newtus those are awesome....it looks really healthy but then I wouldn't really know unless there was like a hole or something obvious

yea i looked at a normal mri though and its not that same. google normal mri.

We'll the top two look ok but yeah I see the Chriari in the bottom now...

It's hard to say what is normal in the MRI because we're not doctors. I would look too much into it.

im glad everyone enjoyed the pictures of my brain. i feel violated now. like everyone knows me now