Roll Call.....#30

I'm worried that people are expecting too much of me. I'm making a little bit of progress just by taking baby steps forward, but as soon as I take a little step people then assume I can take a huge leap. It upsets me so much. I know that if my moods weren't being controlled by medication I'd have gone on a massive rage about it by now, but my moods can't get much further than a little bit of irritation otherwise I just feel tired. Sorry, rambling a bit now haha. Hope everyone on here's doing OK.

What's a depot???

Injection

Ok so I saw a commercial drone spying on me yesterday and when I pointed it out the lights on it went out then people started sending out these flying lantern things to cover it up. It was obviously a drone cuz it was going all these directions and occasionally stopping, then disappeared when I acknowledged it. My mom said it was just made up in my head but I believe otherwise.... (dramatic plot twist music)

A lot of people fly those for fun..How do you know it was commercial? I saw a really nice fireworks video taken by a drone...

Here is the drone fireworks video...

I am guessing. It probably wasn't, but it would be more rational to say it was. The fireworks weren't on yet.

Yeah I don't know...I haven't seen one in life yet but my internet experience suggests they are pretty common. When do you go see the pdoc(psychiatrist) for the first time?

My mom is being hesitant cuz she said that she thinks pdocs are to quick to diagnose. Is that true? She said that if I have probs in school she'll take me. I really don't wanna go cuz they will just give people a reason not to believe me.

That was a beautiful video, thanks for posting!

I think some can be but I don't really have a diagnosis other than psychosis which is just a symptom and I'm like like three years out so I don't think they are all quick to diagnose. The ideal thing to do is go to any sort of first episode psychosis program....they know when you need meds and when you don't need them yet and they can sometimes offer things like cbt that might help without even needing meds. I'm just worried because if you are sick the sooner they treat you the more likely it's a temporary problem and not something permanent...it's kind of like cancer that way...easy to treat early on but progressively more difficult the longer you wait...for me I would rather just talk to a pdoc and see what they thought about it....if I was ok then no big deal....if they were worried then maybe they could monitor me for a while and then decide if meds were needed etc. unless you tell them you're going to hurt yourself or someone else they can't actually force you do anything you can just walk away if you don't like what they have to say...

Thanks...do you guys do fireworks for any holidays over there?

We'd only have official ones for certain events or festivals. The County were I'm from does them every year for the Opera Festival for example. Fireworks are actually illegal here without a commercial license but we do get the illegal fireworks going off at Halloween and New Years!

It depends on the pdoc. My pdoc isn't big on diagnosing anything. She just treats the symptoms. I didn't even know what my diagnosis was for sure until my school asked for it to register me with the accessibility office.

Here it's state to state...we can have I think sparklers and fountains here but nothing that launches...the rules have changed a lot since I was a kid...yeah we do New Years too but not Halloween...that sounds fun

i hear sounds of people talking like on the radio. i see people driving by and think they are going to perform a drive by shooting.

Thank you!

I'm sorry newtus.

Very cool. I've tried several times to establish a meditation routine and can't seem to do it.

I sometimes worry I expect too much of my son. Keeping the lines of communication open helps. Sometimes it's really hard for me to understand how hard things are for him. One time he was telling me how hard it was for him to go to the store. I explained that it's hard for me to really understand that, because I go to stores all the time. His answer really stuck with me. He said, "I know you do, and I don't know how you do it." For some reason those words just clicked with me, and I saw that something I take for granted is really difficult for him.

So, I think you need to let people know how hard you're trying and remind them not to push you past your limits.

For what it's worth, my son has told me several times now that making himself leave the house daily and do something - library, laundromat, rec center, store - has gotten much easier with time. I always tell him to push himself just a little bit past his comfort zone but not too far. I think that's good advice for everyone - with or without a psych dx.

I'm glad your mom is cautious. I worry about over-medication, especially with a still-developing brain. If they only used CBT or psychotherapeutic interventions, I'd be less concerned.

S.p.'s point is well-taken, though. If there's a problem, sometimes it's best dealt with sooner rather than let it fester. I've just heard of more people who say they've had bad experiences with mental health folks than good experiences. And there are other ways of dealing with problems than with psychiatrists.

Yeah I also question meds at 12 but the first episode clinics tend to have other options if you can find one. I just worry because the longer I was sick the more my delusions got built up with "evidence" and it was harder to fight the fact that it wasn't real even once I got meds. There is still part of me that wants to believe it's all true.

I accidentally unsubscribed from this thread so I be making this post to counter that. Lolz

You can just use the thread tools at the top if you want....

Unfortunately what I saw was wholesale medicating. I adopted a teenaged boy from foster care who had severe behavior problems. He arrived on meds, and there was no point when he was living with me that he wasn't prescribed meds. (Taking them was a different story. One time they put him in residential treatment, and I was able to get in and clean out his room. I found Depakote and buspar pills hidden everywhere. No wonder his blood levels of Depakote were always too low. )

At that time I was attending a support group for parents of mentally ill kids. Much of the talk was about the meds - what worked, what didn't work, what used to work but then stopped working, what was being advertised on tv that a pdoc or pnurse might write a scrip for. Meds, meds, meds and judging by the stories the parents were telling, the kids weren't getting any better.

My adopted son's last girlfriend was telling me all about her miserable family life, so I told her to see a therapist. She said she used to but her parents wouldn't allow it any more. Then a few months later, she and her mother told me that they believed the girl saw ghosts and spirits and was some kind of a clairvoyant or something. My first thought was that my advice to her to see a therapist was so bad. Yes, she had some anxiety and some family problems, but I can't imagine what a therapist would do if she went in there and talked about seeing ghosts like that. And yet the girl didn't seem to be psychotic to me at all.

My son said it was like a snowball rolling down hill and picking up everything in its path. I think of it as a ball of snarled yarn. If you get in there and gently untease the various ends, you'll have better luck than if you just pull at it willy-nilly. If you're fast enough and accurate enough, the delusion knot just falls apart in your hands.