Roll Call 42

My delusion cost around or at least $10,000 and forced me to move numerous times. I wish I had not gone through that. I wish I hadn't ended up here! What a mess my life is. And I'm too old now to rescue myself.

thanks sometimesp and chickenfoot. i feel like i went on a rant

@angelique

i havent moved yet because of paranoia and stuff but ive thought about it many many many times. idk what im going to do when i dont have my dad anymore. i mean i feel like he protects me.

I can understand that. Hopefully he will be around for a very long time. I don't have any good advice because I'm in such a weird situation now myself. I know I took care of myself most of my life but I was able to then. I dont know what I could do now.

Evening roll call... hope you are all ok...

Voices have been a bit worse today, I think it's because I am coming down with something... feeling achy, a bit cold & my sinuses are sore too. Fun!

I'm sorry, Loial. I hope you feel better soon. Do you have any zinc lozenges? They sometimes help me. And orange juice.

At least your cold had the decency to wait until xmas was over

t says it will require effort but i am going to try my best !

Yeah hangovers suck! What helps you through them?

Hope everyone had a nice Christmas

It's snowing really hard here. And my son is pushing carts in this weather. Hope he's ok.

Newtus, sorry you're having such a hard time.

Angelique, I sent a wish there would be no more bugs.

Oh it's great to see you! How are you doing?

Hey sometimesp,

How are the meds going , you lookn to come off them or planning to stay on them indefinetly. Are you taken much of a dosage , im probably on them for the forseeable future

Not to bad, just getting a bit stressed, but I'm going to talk to my nurse on Monday.

Thanks!

Hey...good to hear from you again, how did your quest for other message boards go? The meds are good I'm down to 7.5mg for three weeks now and looking ok. I don't see my pdoc until March and we haven't really discussed tapering off. I guess I'd like to try to go off again if nothing goes terribly wrong....my symptoms were far less with this relapse so maybe it's going away or becoming less severe.....it's hard to come up with real trends with two data points.

Have your doctor's mentioned schizotypal personality disorder to you?

Nope the only thing they mentioned was possible bipolar but they said all my Dx's were rule out so I don't fit anything in particular at the moment....

Yeah its grand, im on other forums , i usually post there as i did here , im really posting the same kind of stuff , im rarely looking for support , just sharing my own view on the illness. Your kinda lucky that you seem to tolerate abilify quite well , it will always be handy if you need to go back to it if you choose to go med free. Hopefully in the future , there will be better , safer treatment.

well I didnt go over to my aunts place my mum was pissed at me but I was not about to have their fakeness and hurtful words ruin my night. so i stayed home and I threw those large ugly clothes in a bag I will probably donate them or something I am not going to wear something that was given to me to make me look like a fool. On a more positive note I start work for the first time on January the 5th at the bookstore. I am nervous and excited. so I have been trying to mentally prepare myself, do any of you have any good life tips on working around people and being helpful in a workplace?

That's the nice thing I can always go back on the meds and i seem to have a relapse signature of knocking noises so it's easy to tell at this point assuming that happens again...at the same time the meds make me function better to some extent and it takes time to get back on so I hate to keep stopping them all the time. Still I think one more try....

well I was serious about asking for job advice...I never worked around people before so I am nervous about it I have never had a steady job either or a real job before. I just dont want to mess things up for myself like I always seem to do...

I really only have somewhat bad advice and that's to remember that the people you're interacting with don't really matter all that much...it's easier to distance yourself and get through the day...now I'm sure ideally you would smile etc all the time but for me that gets too rough and the goal just becomes making it through.

Sleep, plenty of sleep!

My advice would just be try to learn everyone's name (co workers) and not be too helpful with customers unless they ask. It isn't that bad, just sometimes boring. I wasn't good working around people so I mainly worked nights alone at my job.