roll call 43

i hope this cold im developing doesnt get worse. i took some theraflu. it seems to work but it tastes like vomit

im stumped a bit. i wrote 20 things so far that i like about my sister. idk what else to write. does anyone have any ideas or topics i should write about? i have to write 300 little one or two sentence notes.

Focus on the things your sister does well in her own life? I don't know.

Why not do a month jar instead of a year jar?

Maybe I can be a better judge in the future of who not to talk to. Apparently I don't know how to refrain from being honest when honesty isn't wanted and fantasy is the only thing that will do. Maybe everyone on pc is just interested in their own fantasy of life and no one wants to hear the truth about anything ever.

i already made the jar label and put 365 jar on the label.
so i cant just stop

TMI
my lips started drying up a week ago and now since im sick my throats drying up. and then i noticed other parts of my body are drying up and my skin is itching...

How about physical things, great hair, smile, fashion sense, shoes whatever stands out....

thank you.
i think i need to do smaller things like that because ive been doing general things.

If you have something to say I would love to hear it. I don't always know what to say but I can listen.

Thank you. In general I'm just miserable. I don't know what to say. I'm wondering if I've been spoken about behind my back.

i dont think everyone on PC is interested in their own fantasy. its not about it being about fantasies either. theres quite a few people here that are very sick and cant get out of their delusions.

am i talking about the right thing?

No, that's not what I meant. Nevermind. I didn't mean anything about anyone on roll call.

ok im sorry. disregard what i said.
i thought you were commenting on something else.

ok :/ well
im not going to finish this in time.
this project.

So I just looked into NAMI and there actually is a peer to peer support group in my hometown and I never even knew about it. My hometown is really mental health focused so I'm really happy.

Ive borrowed a bike off my mum so I'm guna start biking to try and tone my legs up and lose some weight. I'm really motivated at the minute

thats good. my town isnt. and the next town over isnt. but my old hometown is slightly ok with mental health but only has 1 nami group or just 1 group about anything mental health related that i know of.

That's a shame, is down south kind of bad for mental health?

Yes, it's truly terrible.

It's all a bunch of people with the "We Don't Talk About That" mindset.

That's awful and truly sad. I'm up way north where there is a lot of support for people with mental illnesses and I'm glad my family moved up here because I lived deep down south near Texas when I was younger.

no its actually not that bad. it depends on what state you goto.
texas in general isnt so good. but goto the bigger cities in texas like dallas (which is 40-50 miles away from me) or austin texas (which is a lot like LA in terms of homelessness and even other things like LA. literally) and maybe even houston - along with other big cities - and youll find MUCH better care. but again texas in general i would say is average. but above average in the bigger cities. Dallas actually has quite a few things for mental health care but its not the best ive seen. i cant get any help from Dallas county services though because i dont live in that county. but theres only a few really big cities here in texas. Texas got a D i think in mental health grading by NAMI.

oklahoma got a better NAMI state grade than texas. it got a B for mental health care. ive never had mental health care there so idk how good it is. ive never had mental health care in any other state but ive been to other states like CA and mississippi and louisiana. my cousin is on disability in mississippi but for seizures. so idk how well he does but he doesnt get as much as me.

my other cousin is in CA and has been to psych hospitals for cutting and bipolar and she said where she lives - in San Jose (northern california like near san francisco) is not that good. but i suspect San Francisco would be better because its bigger than san jose...but then again san jose is big. i mean its home to Silicon Valley and all the tech giants.

Work is going well Its a little hard because I keep worrying if the people Im working with me like me or not I dont see why they wouldnt but I keep being hypersensitive thinking everyone is just pretending to like me the customers though I am having a hard time trying to smile and be nice to them its required at my new job to smile and say hi to them and ask them if they need help and help them find what they need then ring them up and tell them to have a good day. Its hard for me to show so much emotion in front of other people. but other than these things its going good and I am very happy with it

That's wonderful, Lillybird! I was wondering how that was going.

My state got a B in mental health care by NAMI, I just checked.