Roll Call 44

Oh right, I work in a hospital so therapy is a little different when it's in the building next door. Sometimes I forget...

Do you have any idea why they think you have identity and relationship problems? I know sometimes clinicians can make assumptions based on one statement that may only apply to one part of who you are. Here is a example:
I was told I didn't know who I was last Friday. It shocked me because I do know who I am, what I like, what my strengths and weakness are etc. I certainly don't feel empty and lost. All I did was express my desire to work part-time, put school on hold and return later when I can actually pay for it without loans. The only thing that I'm unsure of is employment because I don't have any experience.


Perhaps you can tell the psychologist that you don't want to do DBT or ask for a different therapy.

ok Tweaky is not hitting on me idk y he said that

That sounds handy alright In my case it'll be getting on a 2 and a half hour coach journey.


Thanks for your reply didgee. I left my college course due to the stress of working part time and paying the rent in the city which was quite expensive. Myself and my fiance where just about making enough money to pay the bills and we could never do anything, go anywhere, meet friends, because we where so broke. This stressed me out so I decided to leave college with a certificate after two years with the option to go back for another year in the future to get my degree. Maybe this had something to do with it? I still very much want to go back to college and get the degree I had started working towards, I'm just taking my time, no bigee.

Then there's my most significant relationship, my fiance and me. We're currently texting each other silence of the lambs references, he is the man for me Things got a bit rocky last year though as my self harm was out of control, he really supported me but could only do so much and we took a break, I needed to get my act together. When he left I didn't fall apart that ''Oh my god I neeeed him I can't do anything without him'' no I cried for about a day as I wasn't sure if it was over and then decided to get my s__t together. We're back on track now and all is good.

I wouldn't really consider that a loss of identity or my relationship to be as troubled as I've read bpd people generally have. We had a bump in the road and we got through it, does that mean I have ''relationship difficulties with everyone I meet'' Blah I dunno

They're pretty set on DBT up there for some reason.

Sorry just paranoia. I just hate getting attention and then I accidentally cause it

A lot of people attack me so .. And my mom recently did it to me so I just need to calm as junkdna said. I have a fear that newtus will haram me but it isn't true. I have to believe in the truth.

I just wasn't help with this problem of paranoia I have. And I know meds just mask the symptoms but don't actually help me.

*Gives newtus a hug and is deathly afraid just like every hug but does it to get better..*

:/

your fine...
your probably safer here than anywhere else on the net

my meds





spooks urn.



my living room

random pics!!!!!!!

That urn is lovely, what a really nice way to remember him/her.

random things on my bookshelf

oops two of them are rotated. oh well.

im gonna put the camera down now

thanks. they chose the urn and stuff. but it is pretty. he died a little over a yr ago. i still cry abt it

junk your so like me! i have a pic of my cat with a cat frame and maps on my wall and candles. loli even have that exact flashlight

do we even have our nails painted black too?!

lol . mine are like dark green. i just painted them today! that flashlight doesnt work anymore but i keep it anyway. i think i keep it cuz its heavy and if i had to hit someone it would do the job... lol

I really miss having a neat place. My place is a horrible hoarded mess and I just can't seem to get anything done. I like your living room a lot!

cool cool. that dark green is pretty dark.

yea that flashlight is handy for an intruder

i painted them grey first and then i didnt like it. so i went with this color. i wanted something darker

when i first moved into my old apartment it was pretty bad. i never unpacked anything and i didnt clean. omg it was like a prison. i know how it feels. its like it gets too overwhelming to do anything about it.

Yes! Exactly! And I've been thinking the only way to escape is to move, but I don't have the money. Maybe if I can just save the first and last months rent and some extra for movers I could do it because most of my stuff will get tossed or put in storage. Last thing I want to do is move it into another apartment.

junkDNA, I'm sorry about your cat

I currently have two cats, but my cat Jack passed away 2 years ago. We have him cremated and in a box from the vet and we set pictures of him around it but haven't got to getting a nice urn yet. I miss him so much, pets are family. I'm getting a tattoo in memory of him on Friday.

ive been trying really hard to keep my new apartment clean and so far it's working out. i just do a little bit each day. moving is stressful though. i hope u can figure something out. i know how horrible it is for ur home to feel like a prison. it affected me emotionally so much. having a clean space makes me feel better

pets are family to me too. all my cats have been my best friends. spook was with me thru a lot of stuff. i could always count on him to be there when i got home. it was really horrible when he died. i dont even want to think about it... im sorry about ur cat. its really hard when you lose a part of ur family

now i have toby. it took a while for me to bond with him. but now he is my baby. hes a little fiesty sometimes lol. hes def scratched my face more than once! but hes getting more cuddly. he used to be feral so hes a wild kitty

I thought philosophy was going to be easy, but it's literally the hardest class I have ever taken because of it being abstract thought and not concrete information like chemistry or math. I feel like I'd be better at this class if I didn't have autism.

yea losing a cat can be devastating. i had a cat named Zeke when i was in my teens. she was an outside cat. so she got pregnant and gave birth to three kittens under my moms bed. i took care of them from the day they were born. i wanted them to be inside cats but my mom let them out. i was so mad. letting them out made them more wild. they lived for a few years and died. well one actually ran away and wouldnt become tame. idk why. but the other two were very tame. i treated them all the same. they were ALL different colors. one was a typical looking grey tabby like the mom - i named her Monkey. and one was bright orange and white. his name was Creme. and the last was black and white. i named him CowBaby.

heres a picture of Creme:

thats so interesting you say that.
im taking an intro too. its not easy to understand but its not too hard for me and its really fun. like i really like it quite a bit.