[Resetter]

anyone ever been very delusional with a dash of hallucination, if so give a light hearted view of things extra points will be given for perceiving things on a quantum level

[A18793715]

I hear voices 24/7. It's easy for delusions to pop up for me. The other night, my boyfriend and I were walking down the street when I got extremely paranoid and went into a full blown panic attack because I thought a sniper would kill me at any second. I've never had a full blown panic attack while having a paranoid delusion. My body was in fight or flight mode. I collapsed on the floor crying when we made it back and I don't remember the rest of that night.

[Resetter]

Originally Posted by A18793715

I hear voices 24/7. It's easy for delusions to pop up for me. The other night, my boyfriend and I were walking down the street when I got extremely paranoid and went into a full blown panic attack because I thought a sniper would kill me at any second. I've never had a full blown panic attack while having a paranoid delusion. My body was in fight or flight mode. I collapsed on the floor crying when we made it back and I don't remember the rest of that night.

sounds terrifying. in full episode, in the hospital, I had the warped belief that I was doing to die in 5 seconds time, sort of like those final destination movies, where its like cause/effect. And everytime I thought 5 secs had finished, I would die in the next 5 seconds if I thought the wrong thought. It ended up I got so stressed, that I said in my thoughts, come on kill me then and the pressure eased, It was a sort of psychogical exposure therapy, a simulation to reduce tension/anxiety

[Sometimes psychotic]

Hmmm...never the quantum level but certainly the molecular level. I thought I was being recruited to the psychic AGA a secret part of something I'm already a member of. Basically I was being helped to write a grant on the molecular mechanisms of diarrhea but through kind of a telepathic thought process. Also I thought I was helping some shamans set up an energy conduit between worlds to heal a paralysed wind goddess. I had to go to a special school to achieve this which happened to be the psych ward...there I created a special wand which connected energetically to a peacock lamp that I have at home and allows me to help other people remotely. Then there were the leprechauns....they worked at garden centers and made soemthing called spirit plants that helped connect two people together. You could only have one spirit plant per person and they were always highly unusual plants like the limequat that were new enough I had never seen them on earth before. These were the fun/good ones

[A18793715]

@sometimes, those sound super weird but at least not super terrifying.

@resetter, I know that feeling. Last night when I was having my panic attack, I just wanted to scream out to just kill me already because it's so hard to deal with.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by A18793715

@sometimes, those sound super weird but at least not super terrifying.

I have some scary ones but was trying to keep it lighter....most of mine were more fun than scary though...thankfully.

[Resetter]

that's good to hear, do you know why your ego is using delusional thinking?

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by Resetter

that's good to hear, do you know why your ego is using delusional thinking?

They told me it was too much stress....

[Resetter]

"they" are right, stress/anxiety, some delusions are your want for power or control, others are exposure to your fears in a super scary way, others are magnification of guilt, this is my opinion, I have experienced 5 different kinds of delusions...as easy as it sounds, all you got to do is chill out and eat your green vegetables lol

[Sometimes psychotic]

Yeah I'm still working on the chilling out part...it's harder than it should be....

[Resetter]

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Yeah I'm still working on the chilling out part...it's harder than it should be....

the doc took me off the antipsychotic, and I had to relearn the lower energy states including relaxation, had to retrain myself...the excess senergy I sublimated into analysis or intellecualisation. and the feeling of it, like being hyperware like I was some tuning fork lol

[neil w]

SometimesP i didnt know how close your delusion(s) were to your work. Did it involve specific people you worked with or was it connected just in ideas about work? Mine involved alot of people i was working with and uni administrators, polititicians et al, and i have many memories of them working with me to achieve what i thought we were doing. That makes it very difficult for me to untangle.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by neil w

SometimesP i didnt know how close your delusion(s) were to your work. Did it involve specific people you worked with or was it connected just in ideas about work? Mine involved alot of people i was working with and uni administrators, polititicians et al, and i have many memories of them working with me to achieve what i thought we were doing. That makes it very difficult for me to untangle.

Yes it did. My break occurred like a day after a national conference so it wasn't my direct coworkers but more important PIs that I rarely see....luckily the voices occurred only on the right side of my brain so at the end I was able to know what had actually happened based on where I heard something. Basically I was keeping two sets of books one for the real world and one for the spirit world. At the end I just walked away from the spirit world although it was still hard it certainly wasn't as hard as it could have been.

[neil w]

what do you mean onlly on the right side of your brain? that sounds very similar to what i was doing. I thought day to day we werent supposed to talk about it and even now i still look for points where were supposed to debrief.

[Sometimes psychotic]

Originally Posted by neil w

what do you mean onlly on the right side of your brain? that sounds very similar to what i was doing. I thought day to day we werent supposed to talk about it and even now i still look for points where were supposed to debrief.

I wasn't supposed to talk about it either they would end my recruitment. In the end I wanted to end the game even if I couldn't join. My thoughts/voices had directionality always from the right side----the left side was me.