Roll Call 86

Sorry, I got a little swayed and I'm probably speaking out of that. I don't want to leave here for anything.

Yes, but I'm such an inconvenience.

And worse, I can't find an empty tank to use for my ecig. So I've been thinking of just buying a pack of cigarettes. But that's a really bad idea.

Um ok?
I didnt say i was getting it now?

Im waiting til money comes in and after ive paid all my bills. I may not even have money for it in 30 days. It may have to even be after 30 days. Im just waiting...........

ok. 1234567890

Im pretty smart with my money. I pay all my bills *ON TIME* before i spend money for anything else. I just canceled a subscription for something yesterday because it was costing too much.

I dont even buy clothes for myself anymore. the only new clothes i have i got for christmas....

I don't know what to do. None of my hardware works and I have to get up asap. It's 11:08am on the east coast. I'm driving myself crazy because the two OK tanks are still unworkable. I can't stand this anymore. I have to go downstairs at about 2:00.

I'm going crazy.

Crazy in membrane

I can't get a tank to heat up. I don't know what to do - hours and hours and hours of this. I don't know what to do. I have to start getting washed and dressed. I am so upset. I've been trying since yesterday and I'm having a mess of everything. I'm so upset.

I don't know if I can manage this at all. If I choke he may never forgive me. My wonderful friend who puts up with so much weirdness from me.

I had to roll a cig. I smoked about 1/3 of it, it did not agree with my stomach. Maybe this is why my cognition is poor, being under drugged nicotine. How will I do this? Did I even take my meds today? Oh God.

I'm afraid to get off my bed. But I'm officially running late now. Must hurry.

[QUOTE=Angelique67;5543665]

Well I forced there by crisis line they called I had 3 cops banging at my door then they placed me under the mental health act. The paramedics showed up downstairs I said hello to staff I was delirious she looked like like a giant ugly lizard that talked with an ugly bob on top. I told the police to get me outta here everything is crawling with bugs their is an infestation I could hear crunch and smush under my feet as soon as I got outside the ambulance looked like mud/slime on wheels.
The paramedics were nice she asked me not to hurt her while we in the bus I agreed. I asked if that was standard or was that because I was off me rocker?
She asked for ID which I dug around for in backpack to find my wallet. I slowly drifted away and automatic responses were given I to entrenched with my voices and I kinda slumped down and over. I remember they had to stop the bus and check my vitals were shouting at me since it's a short bus ride of about 7mins or so. I suppose I was catatonic or having another black out I was somewhere else they had told me when I came to that they were shouting at me and I was incoherent and I had slid down in the chair And I was all limp
So when they re took my vitals they said they were perfect compared to 192/97 in the bus moments before! They left and the police officer stayed but before that happened they had a pow wow.

The psych nurse I saw was less then impressed but she's always been a b.tch/grump she actually went off to get me a sandwich and brought me back a tuna I was like I dislike tuna I will let it go free in the toilet though! She didn't laugh. She was like you know being homicidal it's a police matter not a mental health matter your suppose to be locked up and taken away?!? I was like why do I have to keep saying this to professionals I will never act upon it like does it really matter anymore because you never f.cken listen!

(Sorry about all the profanity)

Then the swayed ER doc came in and she kept pushing clonazepam/Ativan on me to keep me calm but I outraged and angry no one was taking me seriously. Then I saw this man out of the corner of my eye swearing at me so busted his chops and swore out loud to him it freaked the ER doc right out so she ran to get security then he watched me the whole entire time which put me on edge. I told him he was creepy and stalkerish. The doc kept saying pay attention to me I was doc it hard when theirs voices people staring at you because cussed at something in the corner, it's a little much!
She's like people like "you shouldn't be wandering around town unmediated!" I was like well guess what I do take my filthy meds but I am not going to stoop to your level. And people like me all we wanted was to talk on the crisis line not to come here to be insulted by ER docs with big heads because their egos are massive and can't fit through the door so that's why they always walk in sideways!

That's why I was at the hospital

Wow, green tires, that's a very exhausting exercise. I'm so afraid. I need to start getting there! Thank you

Everyday i say im gonna wash my car and every day i dont for some reason.

I am feeling more and more that I can't go. But my friend will get extremely angry.

Oh God, someone's singing in front. And pushing on my door? What is going on? I only just took off my nightgown thinking I'd take the consequences. Now I'm not so sure.

I've been very quiet all day. What is that pounding?

Just back from college.

Feel worn out... just cooking some dinner and then I plan to sit on the sofa watching TV or maybe reading until bed.

Things are bad. Saw my cpn. Wants me to see the psych asap. What's the point. Meds don't work. Just want to go to sleep and not wake up.

My friend is furious at me. He said he wont come back here again.

Meanwhile, I'm still getting the crazy texts. I also want to go to sleep and not wake up again.

Someone played a concerned citizen and opened my door way, earlier in the day. There is nothing I can do about it. They all just pretend nothings happening. Nothing to see here.

I'm sorry things aren't great justme & angelique

What's everyone doing tonight? I decided to start watching the Harry Potter films in the end... been ages since I saw them!

I seem to be a continual ddos attack. I don't know what anyone here makes of that. I'll be glad when all this is over.

My stomach is sick and my friend is sick of me.