Roll Call 96

I know!!! Im so excited.

Waiting to go to bed. Just killing time.

Whatchu up to, valley!!!

Same. It's quarter to 4 so hopefully I won't be up much longer. Luckily no real spiders tonight! But I am majorly bored. So bored, in fact, that I even read a BS 'news' article about how the solar eclipse messes with menstruation! But the article couldn't even get it straight whether the moon is a full moon or a new moon today, switching back and forth between the two! Lol They put some nonsense on my iPhone news app!

*Willow*

Nothing. Hanging out with my husband and reading here. How about you?

I hope you get to sleep soon. I can't stay up that late anymore. I'm ready for bed at 10 but don't usually go until 11. The days of staying up until 4 is long gone.

I should read.

I am just laying in bed on facebook.

I read that you shouldnt be on the phone in bed. That the bed should only be used for sex and sleeping. Not associated with anything else.

But i only use it for sleeping and masturbation and being on facebook. I had sex on the floor.

Thanks! Yeah, I used to go to bed around 11pm back when I could sleep ok (or if I'm drugged on certain APs), but my sleep has been f***ed for ages now and I don't usually sleep before 4am at the earliest. It'd be nice if it was 'normal' but c'est la vie...

*Willow*

Apparently my community pdoc turned up at rehab today to see me...But I had no idea he was coming, so I was out. I find it really hard to believe that he came here to see me because:

1) he's supposed to be doing clinic at the hospital on the other side of the city at the time that he supposedly came here,

2) he's far too busy to trek across town to see me rather than give me an appt to see him at the hospital like everyone else does,

and 3) nobody knew he was coming so why would he show up unannounced on the offchance I would be here??!

It's all just very weird... But, unsurprisingly, no one at rehab knows if he's going to come back again, or give me an appt to see him in the outpatient clinic *sigh*

*Willow*

What do you think?

I tried to catch up on roll call. I didn't check it a day and lots happened! Seems like a lot of people are feeling a little better? I hope so. *hugs to all*

I stepped out of work and caught a peek of the eclipse today. I like those sorts of things.

Heading to bed now, good night everyone!

Yeah, sometimes I struggle to keep up too, especially if I miss a few days!

I'm glad that you got to see it too.

How's everything with you and your wife?

*Willow*

I went to sign up for the MH courses this morning. It was such patronising BS, so I'm hoping that the courses are better than the stupid enrolment forms! I had to come up with goals to achieve from the courses...I figured that I couldn't really put that I wanted to do the assertiveness course so MH staff would stop treating me like ****, so I made up some BS about wanting more confidence when using assertiveness skills. The psychosis course was full, which it always was years ago when I last tried to do it.

There's all of these stupid new rules to enrol too. Before, anyone could attend if they wanted - people with official MH diagnoses, people without diagnoses, carers, family/friends, NHS staff; basically anyone who wanted to learn more about MH. Which I thought was good. Now though, you have to be using secondary MH services, and she couldn't just take my word for it, oh no, she had to look me up on the computer to check that I wasn't lying!! And before, when she thought I wasn't a 'MH service user' (god, I hate that term!!), we were sat in the room with the door shut, but whatever she read on the computer made her keep the door open from then on in case I attacked her or something! MH services etc are so f***ing stigmatising! Grrr!

But, on a lighter note, I am going to the cinema with my Dad this afternoon. We're going to see The Hitman's Bodyguard. Not sure if it'll be any good, but my Dad fancies seeing it so

Hope everyone has a lovely day today!

*Willow*

I hid from the solar eclipse, I knew I would be the idiot to go blind because I'd be trying so hard to not look that I'd end up staring up at it lol. I didn't have the special glasses so just stayed inside

Turns out my repeat prescription didn't go through. Had to call the GP to enquire and they said I should have enough. Well yeah I should have if I hadn't OD'd. Oh well, I should be getting it today anyway now after explaining. Hopefully works out because I'm all out of olanzapine.

Morning

Having coffee

I am super tired. Probably from the gabapentin. And i got up in the middle of the night and was eating. It felt like i was sleepwalking.

Online classes started yesterday and are stressful as hell. Anxiety through the ******* roof.

My course starts next week and already my anxiety has gone up and I'm worrying about what might happen...

I think more generally the first week or so is always stressful until you settle into a routine with school.

I hope the stress passes soon.

I'm waiting for intake. There are 8 people in front of me. I'm horrified. My poor daughter has to wait with me . This is terrible. And exactly why I'm thinking of switching. Everyone here is for addiction. I just need my meds!

Omg this is torture. The lady next to me has been talking to herself about the wait. Every other word out of her mouth is the f word. Like lady I'm sitting here with my 11 year old. You could show a little respect.

Good morning,

Just wanted to check in, I am currently at work so yay lol. Talk to you all tonight!

feeling off lately. really off.