ParRoll Call 97

No my vape broke a while ago I just never got round to ordering a new one. I caved in and smoked a cigarette.

I hate to say good, but hopefully now you won't be fixated on needing a smoke lol.

Almost finished work. On my smoke break right now. Long day. I can't believe I was working full time at one point for 6 months straight with psychosis. I broke down and couldn't do it.



Looks like a bad storm is coming I like storms!

I took a stimulant sleep last night. It's when you take a stimulant and go to sleep. It's better than regular sleep.

Eating my feelings with ice cream

The movies was decent eating dinner now, trying a new to me restaurant right outside of the gates of the military base. Listening to the staff sing in Spainish and joke around. It sounds like they are having a good time.

Yosemite Sam acknowledged me waiting inside for my vape break. I'm still wondering what's really going on between him and Gidget.

I have a bladder infection - boohoo!!
Never had one before this sucks! Have my AC going full bore! Either I have sun burn or I am really breaking out in a rash due to the antibiotics I was only out in the sun for an hour!

I got "increasing risk".

I think that pretty much correlates with my circumstances atm. I'm close to having a problem so need to act pretty quickly. I know I can at least stop for a few days, so just got to extend that.

I'm pretty sure I don't have the funds. At a push I could maybe work cat food etc. into my budget, but any extra costs like veterinary costs or cattery costs if I have to go away I think I couldn't.

I do think it would be positive for me though... you might be right that'd it force me to take better care of myself. One thing though is I struggle keeping on top of cleaning my flat. I think I'd need to get on top of that before welcoming a cat into my home.

I got a small prescription of diazepam last year. Thankfully I managed to only use it sporadically... like about 4 months to get through 15 tablets.

I too found it was almost to easy to rely on the diazepam though and that gave me a lot of respect for it... need to be careful.

I'm certainly not in any rush to get more. Much better now I can rely on my citalopram to control the large extent of my anxiety; the diazepam was only a short term fix.

I hope you feel better soon whatever the cause is..

Could you foster a cat...you know short term for a no kill shelter..I believe they'll take care of the medical they just need a place to stay.

Morning. I got pretty good sleep.

Did they give you the stuff that makes your pee orange? It's an anesthetic and helps a lot but not all insurance covers it.

Not suere but i don't think I could do that... would break my heart having to give them away!

I do plan on adopting an adult cat when I get one though.

I have an adult adoptee. Is that even the right word? She was in a pet shop

. It's easy for them to say that but only you can live your life. Personally you seem happier now but as far as sex you don't have to rush in....you want to know him well beforehand otherwise it's just casual. I'm not saying don't do it....I mean why wouldn't you....it's great . Anyway stop and consider where your advice comes from, what is the dating history of your pss....do they seem happy in life?

Anyway it will mean more in terms of connection if you wait a little while....

My pss said she had a lot of relationships based on sex when she was younger. She says she sees a lot of her in me. I talk to her quite often tho. But you are right. Because i also told her i was hearing voices a lot the other night and she said "its prob just your thoughts". And when i told her it wasnt she said "oh well then you are having symptoms and need to goto the hospital " i was like "um no. Just because im having symptoms doesnt mean i need to goto the hospital. Im not sui or homi". I could tell they werent real but they were bothersome a bit.

Anyway, idk if shes happy.

But this guy is not very attractive to me right now. At all. But hes sweet. So sweet its almost getting annoying. I think hes clingy.

Ugh this guy is clingy

Hes actually almost everything i asked god to send me and idk if i like it.

I remember praying and thinking "i wish i had a guy that would send me good morning and good night texts like my dad does his girlfriend. I dont care what he looks like so much as long as he is respectful and sweet"

Ugh. What the F did i pray for. I wanted the opposite of my ex and i got it.

Good morning. Hope everyone is having a good day.
Slept okay until about 7:30. Then I woke up and had trouble falling back to sleep.
Nothing going on today. It's cold. Only 55 degrees with a high of 64. And it's raining. I'm wearing my winter pajamas watching north woods law.
Hope you all have a good day.

Be careful what you pray for because you just might get it. Or if you dont pray, be careful what kind of things you wish for or vibes you send into the universe, BECAUSE YOU JUST MIGHT GET IT

Sorry he's being clingy. That would drive me a little crazy too. Maybe you can talk to him about it.

Yes its driving me insane. Theres been two instances this past month that has tested my personality and ive come to a conclusion that im still just an introvert that likes to play like an extrovert.

Feeling better today. Went to the gym and kicked my own ***. Still don't have an appetite though...

Depressed as fluck. They're doing Miss Universe's hair and this room is much too crowded. They should be doing it in some other place so it doesn't fluck things up for me!

I hate this morning. It wasn't too cold for me but I really need to be alone. I never get enough time alone.

Fluck!!!!

that sounds miserable.