[BasketCaseMom]

So here I sit, wondering, pondering, worrying, getting ready to patrol my home again. Why is it I see these things? Hear things? Why do I panic so much? Why do I pass out from panic attacks, my head buzzing, vision getting fuzzy, the tunnel, the ringing in my ears, finally the collapse. Why?

Why does the car behind me always have to follow me? Why do people drive by house and slow down to look? Why does the neighbor talk about me to her family when she thinks I can't hear her, inside her house whispering? I bet she is no better than I, or maybe she is. She wants me locked away, I hear her conspire against me. Nothing I can do.

What is that face that looks over my fence at me. Distorted and utterly frightening, like a disfigured cabbage patch doll. Most of all, why won't the horrible little creature cloaked in black that slinks up my stairs; eyes gleaming red, stop peering at me from around the door frame of my bedroom? Why must it torment me?

On that note, if it all just goes away, what will I do? Nothing to occupy me all day. Nothing to hide from? Nothing to talk to me when I am alone. Boring or finally safe? I am just not sure yet.

Now I must go on my patrol, looking for who may be lurking. I can rest later when my husband gets home, he can protect me, but not now. No rest now. It's impossible.

[Perna]

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BasketCaseMom said:
Nothing I can do.

On that note, if it all just goes away, what will I do? Nothing to occupy me all day. Nothing to hide from? Nothing to talk to me when I am alone. Boring or finally safe? I am just not sure yet.

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Ah, there's the rub; if they don't actually attack and there's nothing you can do about them/the situation why not do something you "want" to do? I read, take classes at online schools, go out with friends.