[justalittleparanoid]

I finaly am able to write this. Finaly! Everytime I have been trying to say something to someone, I'd get interupted by the guy thats talking to me. He wouldnt let me say it. I quickly tried to write down a note but he just came back. But now I can. Ok.
I'm having a problem at work. What I thought to believe was troubbling me was that i had mental retardation. Because one of my co-workers in the bakery was talking to me. She talks to me like she talks to anyone else. But I was to believe that I was different some how. So I had racing thoughts, and a voice telling me that I was. And I was convinced. Totaly convinced. I even saw myself as that. I didnt know who I was anymore. I asked my fiance. And then I thought It was all a cover up. That everyone was telling each other, hey dont tell her that she is like this. We dont want her to freak out.
I snaped out of It a week later. And now, I can write about it.

[exmodel]

thats happened to me alot! its really frustrating..especially when you hear voices its hard not to get over the paranoia part. Ive thought i was sooo many different people: Regina Spektor, Marylin Monroe, Mary Magdalene.... and i thought i had split personalities. I thought these things were true and that my friends just wouldnt tell me for one reason or another. I still struggle with that aspect of paranoia but at least i dont hear the voices anymore which really seems to reinforce the slippery slope of thoughts that is paranoia. yeah so i have experienced similar and know how it feels to believe the people close to you are hiding your true identity from you. its a real struggle but i believe you'll pull through
may i suggest that you try to rest? I know it can be hard with the voices and fear creeping up on you at every turn, but rest reall made me feel more alive and happy.Try this: sing,dance to some music take a long bath, put on comfortable soft clothing, maybe go outside and connect with the peace that is a dark starry sky. If the voices or paranoia try to interfere dont be too afraid, nothings going to harm you. Just focus on what your doing and relish in your natural individual beauty and the beauty of nature. just do things that make you feel wonderfull and happy in your skin...