[Eviespring12]

Please don't call me dumb or ungrateful at life or stupid and retarded. I've enough of that thanks ^^
-------------------
Ok so I've been put down by my family to not pursue psychology major in college. I have depression (I'm pretty sure of it) and hypochondria. I started taking interest in psychology because, believe it or not, i liked it plus it makes me feel smart (big words tend to do that to me.) I'm asian (chinese) and I've been put down a LOT by my parents (You're stupid, failure, should've let you died at birth (I was premature), wish you die soon, you can't get a decent grade, why does it take you 10X the effort (studying wise) to achieve an 80-90-100% grade when it takes most people maybe half that much effort to get an A+, you need to go to a mental asylum for how slow and retarded you are, your fat etc. etc.) now I've watched asian sterotype videos on asian moms who say that to their kids but for some reason I'm like...super sensative or something. So I created an imaginary friend, named Alice Alichea, an imaginary world, country, rives,a nd mountains included, schools, students, teachers, etc, to cope with how lonely I am. Of course, i just have a active imagination and I can't really see or hear my only friends, but its also not creative enough that I can draw or write good stories either. Like I'm also as plain and dull of a girl you can get.
I have hypochondria (I call it hypo despite how many types of hypos (hypotension etc.) are out there (I'm lazy) and I'm pretty damn sure that despite my whole life of being addicted to pessimism, I seem to have developed depression along the way, that I've realized I have just this year. It was like I knew I was close to having it or had it but completely ignored my pre-depression symptoms. I finally told my parents how I felt (sad, suicidal (no intentions I have a severe fear of death) etc etc which is why I’m so aggressive and short tempered and never smiling at my customers (family restaurant I’m a cashier) and they told me I was ungrateful, trash, told me to get out, that depression didn’t exist, etc. I’ve always known that I’ve depression or something wrong with me, but I went by everyday okay because back then, well, I was confident my parents were behind me to support me. Nope. I was dead wrong, apparently, if I go to counseling in anyway I’m not to call my mum “mom” anymore. She’s pressure from cultural stigma against mental illnesses, so much that she refuses to let us talk to our cousin because he’s got depression. My whole family laughs at him that he’s being emotional and a baby so…what would they say to me! Ha! Life’s a joke!
I’ve a huge interest in psychology. But I don’t know if I accidently “hyponotised” myself to like it. According to my results (theories) I either have a interest in psychology because 1) I actually have a interest in the subject 2) I’m obsessed with self help and on the way of reading about depression, I wandered off topic (I do that with medical books too and many other science books and articles) and become intrigued with repressive memories, alzemheimer’s, etc. or 3) I’m so into reading about the topics while retaining my #2 goal (desperate to seek self help cause I can’t go to a doctor without losing my family’s light in me) that I’ve convinced myself subconsciously that I enjoy the topic. I do number 3 too with medical science. Intrigued with every medical book out there but make me look at a wound or illness, nope…I’m out.
Now you see? I have to go to college in…7-8 months? I’m grad. High school soon (on time don’t worry ^^) and I’ve chosen accounting under pressure of my mom and society as accounting is a normal job, not as depressing, good pay, can find work, etc etc. but I want to know, am I really interested in psycology? I know I can’t take it because I’ll end up crying in class or something (I cry just from reading the symptoms of depression cause they relate to me) and I’m technically not mentally healthy to even think about liking it just yet, but I really don’t want to do what my mom wants me to do.
I don’t even know…I’m blabbling sorry.

[hiddencreations]

I think the only way to be sure, diagnostic wise, if you have depression is a mental health professional. But, considering you present with many symptoms it may be an issue. Also, the issue may be the family negativity and judging of you, which can create anxiety, depression, and lack of self-esteem.

If psychology interest you go for it. Many people enter psychology because they have some type of personal experience with mental health or illness, familial or self. Some enter it just to help.

To tell you the truth, in college most of the psychology classes taken have nothing to do with abnormal psychology (mental illness). PSY 101 glosses over, an abnormal psych course is definitely all mental illness, and a few classes have some mental health issues mixed in (Criminal behavior or intro to clinical counseling); but, the majority of your classes have to deal with social psychology, experimental methods, statistics, psychology of different groups of populations, history of psych, behavior modification, etc.

In the end, find a major you love. A subject that will fascinate you for years down the road, not just now or for 5 years. Realize that whether or not your parents approve, you are the only person who can discover your happiness. Your parents will either get over the initial disappointment of you not doing what they want or they can be miserable, don't let their unhappiness effect the ability for you to achieve to your happiness.

Don't feel the need to commit right away, use the first year of college to explore a variety of fields. I was a Elementary/Special Ed major and switched because I needed to be happy.

Lastly, once you get to college if you need to go to the campus counseling center, go. Your parents won't know and it will be a place to vent and get help.

[mazing]

I'm sorry that you haven't been supported by your family. No-one should have to go through that. Ultimately it is your decision what you decide to do with your life. Psychology can be a great profession but I also strongly believe that you need to be able to manage your own emotions before being able to help others. But with that, even if you aren't in a place now to study psychology it doesn't mean you won't be able to later if that is your area of interest.

Do you need to choose your major straight away? Would it be possible to take a few different elective classes in the subjects you are interested in and see what you enjoy and do well in? That is often the best way to work out where you are at, what you enjoy and what you can cope with.

[Travelinglady]

If you aren't depressed, then I would be very surprised! Who wouldn't be with the way you have been treated?

You will have some time after you get to school to make decisions about a major, at least for most majors. I suggest you take an intro psychology class to get a better idea. Please keep in mind that a psychology major isn't a good one to get jobs. People need to get at least a Master's degree in psychology.

Maybe you can have two majors---one in keeping with what your parents want and then another one, such as psychology. I think two majors is a wise way to go anyway. I had two of them--psychology and English, and I have used both of them. But I did get a Ph.D. in psychology.

To get a better idea of whether you have depression, then you can go to the Depression forum here and read up on it. In the stickies you can even find a check-up quiz to take to see if you are having symptoms associated with depression.

Is there a school counselor you can talk to? That wouldn't have any stigma, since you could say you went to talk about your college plans.

[IndieVisible]

As I understand it things from my Chinese friends, your culture is much more strict and old fashion. Disgrace is the worst sin imaginable. Take my daughter, my wife, but do not disgrace me. It goes along honor. Your not alone with strict parents. Try to understand they come from a entirely different culture. Just take care of yourself and love your parents no matter what they say. Good luck to you!

[manicmonday!]

I started my undergrad with being a nursing major....LOVED becoming a CNA at age 15 and being able to give advice to family members that would ask medical-related questions. THEY loved that I was going into something they could brag about and would (they thought) bring in the $$$. I had issues my whole life with, what some thought, just being dramatic and emotional (parents especially thought this). My first year of undergrad I was put into a mental health hospital and the summer I finished up my 1st year I attempted suicide. So, here comes my 2nd year...I'm still trucking along with being a nursing major. BUT a couple weeks in I decided my passion was helping those "mentally hurt." I became a psychology major and, actually, it HELPED me. I have always known of the term 'bipolar' but never 'investigated' it. Being a psych major helped me know when I need help! After talking to a psychiatrist and psychologist, we, as a team, came to the conclusion that I have 3 separate psychological disorders. My parents do not like the fact that I graduated with a B.S. in psychology and am now going into social work. They know I will never become rich with my degrees. BUT, I'm doing what makes ME happy. YOU have to do what makes YOU happy! It'll take a while (and I still struggle with this), but try to sort out from what your parents want and just "stride" by their disappointment. When you enter college, please be aware that you may go to the student counseling center without your parents' acknowledgment. They will and can definitely help you! Good luck in your endeavors.