Know when it is time to ask for help

When my family visitied a few weeks ago, by the last day, I was "brain dead" and physically tired of company. I'd worked really hard getting my house cleaned, I've really neglected house work badly while in my worst time of depression and then the aftermath of trying to get my life back on track.....etc. anyway,

I asked my daughter to help me come up with a dinner idea for the 5 cups of cooked chicken I'd done up ahead of time. My brain and body really was frazzled. She understood that I'd been taking care of 2 of their 3 children, taken them roller skating and out in the kayaks, and I'm not at all used to that.

She is so used to cooking for her family of 5 and doing big cooking for groups, that it was simple for her. I so appreaciated her help. We ate a very good casserole with mac and cheese and chicken. She found 2 cans of fruit in the pantry, mixed that together and we had "fruit salad" and I forget what else it was, oh, a can of mixed nuts. It was really good.

I used to think I had to do it all, but it's okay to ask for help when you really need it.

Your daughter sounds wonderful...and you sound like a fun Grandma to be with!
I often get upset and make mountains out of molehills. Family and friends just come to see US, don't usually mind if there is the odd dust bunny or that the meals are straightforward stuff.
I bet you yourself would help without giving it a second thought...why do we hesitate to ask for ourselves then?

Thank you. I appreciate when someone else says my daughtger is wonderful and that i'm a fun grandma to be with. It really means a lot to me

molehills, mountains? There is a difference?

Trust me, there was a big enough collection of dust bunnies to grow potatoes in my house! Now, I am really into a mode of keeping up with it all. To hell with my depression. Summer is good for me.

It's funny, I do offer to help her out, and she usually gives me a "oh, you can snap the beans for me" or "just keep me company in here", which is usually what I get to do-sit and talk and have a good time.

As a sufferer of depression, it is one of the lessons that I gradually learned - not to be afraid to ask for help when you feel you need it and not to feel bad about it.

I often found that even the smallest things proved incredibly difficult. Yet, to someone else, they would come in and do it quickly and easily. It used to make me feel bad - guilty, inadequate. But I had to get over those feelings and realise that what is easy for one person isn't necessarily easy for someone else. We are all good at different things and have different coping levels.

So, it is a good lesson to everyone - don't be afraid to ask for help and don't feel a failure when you do.

As for your daughter - yes, she does sound wonderful and I bet she really enjoyed helping you make dinner - working together.

I am a terrible.......TERRIBLE.......housekeeper. This house is not filthy. It is passable. But, I would rather do anything than clean house. I think it is because I was required to do it and punished so severely if I didn't when I was a young girl. It's my way of rebelling.

My grandmother was an immaculate housekeeper. When she turned 85, we had a surprise party for her. Most of us who possibly could flew in and we also invited as many of her oldest friends who were still alive as we could locate. She, indeed, was surprised. At the point she realized that a whole slew of people were coming into her home, she said, "If I knew all these people were coming here, I would have dusted everything in the china cupboard." This is the line of housekeepers I come from. It's a tough legacy to live up to!