[Discipline]

Hello, thanks for taking the time to read this thread!

I have struggled with self improvement for a while now. I know why I want to improve, but have difficulty in getting there. I would like to start with smaller goals and work my way towards my main goal of self improvement.

I created a number of small goals which include the following:
- Want to wake up earlier so I have the use of a full day.
- Want to eat less junk food, and become healthier.
- Want to focus on my studies so I can pass my exams and succeed in finding a career.
- Want to be more organized so I don't waste my time.

I also face quite a few obstacles to accomplishing these goals:
1. Laziness - Sometimes it can be hard to just get up and go do what I need to.
2. Distractions - I get distracted by various things (such as my phone, or I don't notice when I drift into daydreaming).
3. Spontaneous Events - Sometimes things come up and throw any scheduled plans out of line.
4. Want to "have fun" at the same time while being able to study.

If anyone has any advice or comments on how to achieve these goals and overcome these challenges, please feel free to post them here!

[Travelinglady]

Hey, Discipline. I am glad you found this forum. I didn't think to even suggest it to you.

You might need to work on one or two of these issues at a time. It might be too much to take on all of them. Which one is the most important to you right now? Or maybe two or so?

Have you always been lazy and unorganized and just wanting to have fun?

How old are you? Where are you in school?

I think answering these questions might be the beginning for you and for us who want to help.

[Discipline]

Hi Travelinglady! I believe the most important issues would be getting organized and studying for exams. It is crucial for me to do well.

I'm usually fairly organized, but I'm on summer break right now (but have an exam coming up in December) so I have found myself becoming lazier at this time.

I'm 20 years old and in university. I start my last year in September.

Thanks for taking the time to answer!

[hvert]

I came across something the other day that sounded good to me:

Do one thing each day in pursuit of your goal, no matter how tiny that thing is.

So for eating healthier, you could simply choose not to eat as many potato chips as you want. It's a small action, but it keeps your goal in front of you. On another day when you have more will power, maybe you will choose to eat something healthy for lunch instead of the junk food you crave.

Ha, can you tell that we share at least one goal?

[Perna]

I also face quite a few obstacles to accomplishing these goals:
1. Laziness - Sometimes it can be hard to just get up and go do what I need to.
2. Distractions - I get distracted by various things (such as my phone, or I don't notice when I drift into daydreaming).
3. Spontaneous Events - Sometimes things come up and throw any scheduled plans out of line.
4. Want to "have fun" at the same time while being able to study.

Hi, Discipline, great, doable new habits. One thing I would do off the bat is reword them so they are all positive; in other words, instead of eating less junk food, word that so you are eating more fruits and vegetables? Then I would start in a practical way. For example, I eat an apple a day. Nothing fancy, just, I eat an apple. LOL. Something like that. I would deal with some of the obstacles with:

1. Check out how much sleep you need and get a bedtime routine going so it is not so hard getting up. I needed 9 hours sleep so deciding I wanted to get up after only 7 was not practical and frustrating. Go to bed the same time each night for 3-4 nights and wake up "naturally", see what your average is. You can't hope to have the same time waking if you don't go to bed the same time; if you get up really late you have to go to bed really late. If you need 8 hours sleep, for example, going to bed at 11:00 means you wake at 7:00 a.m., but going to bed at 2:00 a.m. means. . . If you do a varied bedtime you are going to get a varied wake time which will influence your bedtime which will influence your wake time, etc. You cannot be tired enough to sleep at 11:00 p.m. if you did not get up in the morning until Noon

2. Turn your phone off and put it away. Put away distractions or go somewhere else (dining room table) to study. When I am having trouble with my work I go to the library for several hours, just as if I were going to a workplace. Moving around can help you become more organized, you will have to have a "kit" to take with you of what you need/want to work with? You control what you do and where you do it and can use your imagination to fantasize about what you are working on and where it will get you just as well as something wholly unlikely. If you want to take a break from your studies, do web surfing on schools or places to work or job opportunities or something related to your studies. I have a hard time reading textbooks but do well reading/Googling subjects and questions I have online and I learn the "same" stuff, perhaps better because I'm more interested and it is me-directed.

3. Yes, sometimes things happen. Decide what you will allow to change your schedule and build in time and Plan B if they happen. Create a notebook or alternate texts to read/write in while travelling or doing any sort of waiting. Maybe create flashcards or topics of conversation you can see if you can interest others talking about or asking questions in your favorite subject. Most of all, don't feel guilty for occasionally opting out and doing something else, just control it. Allow yourself breaks and time away. When you mess up, write it up in a work journal and see what you can learn from it, why you "had to" get away and see if you can fix that problem. Join or create a study group for subjects you don't enjoy/get/make you anxious, get help/a tutor.

4. Figure out where the "fun" is in each of your subjects. If you cared about this subject, why would you? Use what you are good at, your imagination, to help with what you are bored with. I had to rewrite a paper for a 3rd or 4th time so spent a whole weekend writing it in verse! I read each paragraph of my chapter and translated the concept/thought into a stanza/half a stanza of a prose poem. Did well on the exam because the concepts became "mine". Talk to your math problems, argue with them, make them come alive and tell you their secrets :-)

[Travelinglady]

Great ideas, Perna!

Discipline, I agree that your first priority needs to be school right now, but Perna has some good ideas for small things heading toward other goals.

[Discipline]

Originally Posted by hvert

I came across something the other day that sounded good to me:

Do one thing each day in pursuit of your goal, no matter how tiny that thing is.

So for eating healthier, you could simply choose not to eat as many potato chips as you want. It's a small action, but it keeps your goal in front of you. On another day when you have more will power, maybe you will choose to eat something healthy for lunch instead of the junk food you crave.

Ha, can you tell that we share at least one goal?

Hi hvert! This is some good advice, I will definitely try this next time I'm ordering food! And it's good to know that there is someone else who has this same goal!

Originally Posted by Perna

Hi, Discipline, great, doable new habits. One thing I would do off the bat is reword them so they are all positive; in other words, instead of eating less junk food, word that so you are eating more fruits and vegetables? Then I would start in a practical way. For example, I eat an apple a day. Nothing fancy, just, I eat an apple. LOL. Something like that. I would deal with some of the obstacles with...

Hi Perna, thank you so much for this amount of advice. As for facing obstacles, I tried your solution to #1 and it seems I also need 9 hours of sleep! Now I just need to get into the habit of going to bed around 11 and waking up at 8!

For #2, changing my environment is definitely good idea. Sometimes studying in bed is not a good idea.. that's when I drift into daydreaming LOL. And next time I am studying and need a break, I will try more focused web surfing.

Unfortunately #3 is my Achilles' heel. Making a plan B is definitely a good idea. Usually if something comes up, then I think "oh, now I can't do anything else I had planned for today" and that's when the laziness kicks in It feels rather demotivating when this happens.

Making homework/studying fun has always been a challenge. It can be difficult to find the fun in materials that appear boring or repetitive.

Again, thanks for the great advice, I will definitely be applying these tips!

Originally Posted by Travelinglady

Discipline, I agree that your first priority needs to be school right now, but Perna has some good ideas for small things heading toward other goals.

Yes, school is usually my top priority which is why I spend a lot of time studying/going to lectures/doing homework during the school year. However, since it is summer break, I am also working towards achieving my other goals as well.

[Perna]

Originally Posted by Discipline

Making homework/studying fun has always been a challenge. It can be difficult to find the fun in materials that appear boring or repetitive.

Rewrite the materials as you wish they were! I cannot tell you how many times I sat through a boring sociology class (my major at the time) imagining how I would do "school"/education in my perfect world :-) One tip; I had to read a book and write a report on it but could not get into the book because it was like reading an echo; I already knew what it said (from other stuff) but I had to read it to know I'd already "read" it? LOL What I did was write the report on how the book was written! I did the structure of the book and how it was laid out and what it was attempting to do and how successful that was, etc. -- it looked like I knew the book cover-to-cover when I only knew it literally, the covers and the pages and their ink Talk "about" something if you don't quite know the specifics, or, in my case, you know the specifics but don't know you know them. This was an upper level socy course, with several grad students in it and the professor graded the papers himself instead of having a grad assistant do it, etc. and I almost fell out of my chair because I got an A- and I had not read the book, had "faked" it the night before.

Do a lot of writing, both with your imagination and about your school work; writing comes in real handy, the practice will make you a good writer so you can "fake" it well and writing about what is difficult or boring or just to figure out -- "what is this?" will teach you problem solving for any subject. Writing is just a "word problem" -- so, if you are good at Algebra or (as I found out late, for myself) accounting or doing taxes, in other words organizing/structuring things, use that along with your imagination.

[Travelinglady]

Agreed. Make the subject matter as personal as you can. However, I do suggest that you read the book.

[Discipline]

Yes, that's a good idea, thanks.

I've just come back from vacation. As for my progress.. The good news is I'm able to wake up earlier and use the full day. Bad news is that I didn't get any studying done and certainly was not eating healthy

[Perna]

I always had to study "sideways" I love to read and most of my life have read 5+ books a week but the minute someone else tells me what to read, guess what? LOL So, to study I had to take my interests in a subject and do my own exploring/studying, learn what interested me, etc. Any proper book on a subject is going to cover what they are teaching in school and reading several such books, well, I'll learn what the school wants but in my own way.