A few Measly Steps a Day

Karaoke is one of those world phenoms that shows how picking up on a tiny detail can lead to great things. I'd read that a musician who owned a music store noticed customers humming along with pop songs played in his shop. Seems recorded musics for pro singers to front was already a thing in Japan, but the machine and adding the lyrics (Mitch Miller style) made it available for everyfolk.

Happy all had fun and you have both a roady/grip & the spark of the party as a son-in-law.

Could get better, but not by much. R.

I've been fortifying myself to meet my Student Loan obligation. The loan is a Parent Plus loan that I took out to fund my daughter's education.

I've never made a payment due to the COVID-19 Payment Pause, which was extended yet again due to litigation by a Texas judge.

I don't expect this pause to go on indefinitely, so...

1. I plan to contact the loan folks to get the $10K debt forgiveness (but that's not likely to happen due to the litigation).
2. Request forgiveness due to a change in circumstances, namely my wife "graduating" from hospice but needing home care that I pay cash out-of-pocket.
3. Set up the Roth IRA for automatic payments as a fallback.

So I made progress on #3. I have the form that's needed to request monthly transfers out of the Roth IRA and into my checking account. I expect setting up the automatic payment to the loan will be pretty easy. The only problem is that the loan amount exceeds the balance in my Roth IRA! And it was supposed to be used for my retirement!

Anyway, nice to see folks from Barbara Sher's message board are still active!

Hi SqPeg, always good to see you check back in. Ms. D and I carry on. People drop by for a comment or two and then drift away.

I think the magic of Sher's site was her personality and that people found it after getting excited by a workshop or book of hers. And the exchanges and threads got very involved. I desperately began to off load as much as I could beginning about a year before she shut it down. Some of it I found on the wayback machine. The rest is held in our spirits and hearts, and lost in material reality.

The thread I have returned to a couple of times was The Happiness Experiment Happiness Experiement - BarbaraSher.com

About your situation, CMS and the insurance companies are taking a deep look at the Medicare benefit of hospice care, the first time in 40 years it seems. Your story of your wife 'graduating' from hospice might be good for them to wrap their confused heads around. I'm imagining that's overall a good thing as her health has recovered somewhat.

My brothers and I just used home hospice with my mother's end of life hospice care. I'm also using the bereavement benefit, too, that's allowed for family members. Partly because it's there and I'd like a first hand experience of how it might work, and partly from past runs with grief and knowing a periodic place existed to let "it all hang out" was a help as it allowed me to pretend to manage the rest of my time.

Revu2

About once a decade I channel or stumble upon a financial idea that seems too good but turns out to be legit. About 7 years ago, I saw that with a remaining mortgage at $120,000, and a second mortgage for $50,000, if we paid down the Main to $50k, and paid off rest of the Main with the 2nd, we could then pay down the remaining $50K very fast using the monthly payment amount we were used to. The remaining time dropped from 22 years to 5, and the minimum payment dropped from $800 for principal and interest on the main, to $160 (interest only) on the 2nd.

The risk was we might need the $70,000 of our retirement savings before we had rebuilt them post payoff. We took the risk, it worked, and now we're building our reserves back.

Here comes a current one. I research and think. I'm not a licensed or otherwise 3rd-party certified financial anything. Read this with that in mind and perform you own due diligence.

When scanning for companies that paid high dividends I found this—an ETF (Exchange Traded Funds) company called YieldMax has launched the first 3 of 15 new ETFs that pay between 50 to 70% per year in dividends, paid monthly. That's not a misprint.

The tickers are OARK (keyed to Kathy Wood's ARKK Innovation ETF), TSLY (keyed to Tesla), and APLY (keyed to Apple and just launched a couple of days ago). More to come. They use Treasury Bonds as collateral for selling call options for income which they then distribute to shareholders.

I've put a little money in and await my first dividend payments to reinvest.

Many of the higher-yield ETFs pay about 12%. Right now, YieldMax share prices are in the mid-teens to $20, they should be closer to $83 to give a 12% dividend. The potential for price appreciate alone is between 4 to 6 times.

Thought I'd share it before the market figured out what they really do and are worth.

Revu2

Oh, yay, Square Peg Guy! I'm so glad you remembered us. And congratulations on your wife graduating from hospice. I'm sorry that you had to go through an end -of-life experience, which fortunately had a happy ending.

R, I'm impressed with what you know. When it comes to money, I play it very safe, which investment people would say isn't really all that safe because inflation is eating away, etc. etc. , but it's worked well for me so far.

Me - I think I've solved my insurance problems. It didn't take too many phone calls, and less than an hour on the phone yesterday. It turns out, I used the wrong insurance card, (HMO vs. PPO) Anyway, life is good.
Re writing - I'm at the end stages of my latest book. I think there are no more errors in my work, and I find one on every other page. I don't like social media. That said, I'm entering the world of Facebook. Right now I'm just replying to other people's posts. Next I'll start writing my own posts, and then I'll post about my writing. I found the perfect agent. She's Canadian, and interested in underrepresented voices. This is perfect as one of my main characters is First Nations, and the story takes place in the Yukon. So fingers crossed. I should also say that my writing has improved over time. Of course, I'm nervous, and I'm procrastinating approaching her. So that could be on my to-do list.

Send letter to agent
Write an original post on Facebook.

I hope this isn't too mushy, but, R and Square Peg Guy - I appreciate both of you. R, for being here now, and Square Peg Guy, for helping with "The Molly Chronicles."

I guess that's it for now. Happy stepping!

Shadow and I remember Molly fondly!

Since the topic drifted into financial terrain, I'll just mention that the person I spoke to regarding the automatic withdrawals was very helpful. She warned me that they were required to subtract CT withholding tax, even though Roth IRAs are supposed to be tax-free! So there's a form I need to download and specify 0 withholding on and then submit it with the form that requests the payments. Apparently there's a similar thing in VA. The pension of someone who died recently has been reduced for state withholding tax even though the money should transfer to the beneficiary tax free.

Oh, and delightful, I'm so glad you're still writing!

I still have a couple of pictures of Shadow in my computer. I'm wishing a lot of love, and comfort for you and your wife. And good wishes towards dealing with the student loan.

These recent msgs among us Sher alums reminds me to reach out more to my local friends. In the articles, you read that as many people age they have fewer, more select friends. I'm tacking in another direction, I am creating more friends as I age. About 10 years ago I had a short span in which several people close to me died. And I thought, I need more friends!

I think I threaded about it on Barbara's forum. Found it: "Sun Jun 13, 2010 me: I don't know if it's Asperger's Syndrome Lite or what, but I find I need to replenish my storehouse of friends. My theme song: "

" by the Divine Miss M, Bette Midler."

For 2023, my codename for this is Project Oasis, because friends are a social oasis as I caravan through life. With friends I am renewed and refreshed, challenged, supported, and SEEN and HEARD. I echo back the same, and we part ready to take on the Others.

“I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light.”
― Helen Keller

Your last post rings true, R. I have had three close adult friends, and they all died. I have some good friends now, but not the kind that I can share all my deep secrets with.

A few former coworkers died within the last five years. So now I'm reaching out more to old friends.

My writing is going well, but everything else isn't.

I need to replace my roof, and there's some dry rot under the roof. That's life. I got a letter from my insurance co. saying that if I don't replace it by June 8th, they'll cancel my insurance. (The letter was dated Apr.8th, and I received it on the 24th. Luckily, I'd already signed a contract with a roofer by the time I got the letter. Still, we had a wet winter (what I consider normal, but still a lot of water.), So roofers are really busy. No Idea if they'll get to it before the June 8th. And the dates make me think that the insurance co. wants to get rid of me. Tomorrow, I'll call the roofer and see if it's possible. If not, I'll call the insurance co. and see if they'll postpone the deadline. Meanwhile, I'm righteously nervous/paranoid.

Good luck with the insurance company! I was late in paying a life insurance policy at the start of the Pandemic. They canceled the policy.

But "late in paying" was a bit extreme. I sent the check a few weeks after the grace period. But darn them for not allowing for electronic payments....

Insurance companies ... a pox on them! Most of them are at major risk because of the unstable climate/weather patterns. Tho many might have "mutual" in their names or origin stories, there's nothing mutual about them at all. I once worked at Prudential, and they were grooming a bright, thoughtful person like myself for Big Things there.

All I had to do was pass a measly 10 courses and earn an industry certificate (Certified Life Underwriter). During the studies for the first test I had a chronic stomach ache. As I was also studying NLP at the time, I asked it was it saying. I sensed back: don't do it! Stop. Get out of here! This is not your tribe.

So I bargained. Let me finish this 1 test, I won't take more, and I'll resign. The ache left, I passed and got reimbursed. Wrote a resignation one sunny afternoon sitting on my fire escape. Held it for 6 months while the rest of me caught up. Dropped the lefter.

Once my former boss called and wondered how I was doing. He had hoped I'd gotten some young woman with child and needed to support a family (and return to The Rock). Nada. Too shy, don't want, contraceptives work.

I was gone & I never looked back, R.

Had an interesting chat with a friend this morning about releasing goals we had set but never achieved. Do you hold out a small part of yourself hoping/waiting for a turn of events? Or say a firm goodbye and inwardly re allocate whatever was bound up in achieving these things to fresh matters. Or to just enjoy a rest.

I'm on the side of declaring the goals MIA and likely dead. Regrouping and moving forward.

So I mourned, lit a candle, sat a moment in silence.

And picked up and carried on ... R

Hi R. I appreciate the inside scoop on insurance companies. My roofing company says there should be no problem extending the deadline, and the letter says, "MAY result in cancelling my insurance." So I'm probably ok. Just a little more nervous. Meanwhile, the roofer gave me a date of June 1st, which is withing the insurance company's deadline. However, Tesla - the company that is moving my solar panels, says they'll be able to get to me sometime in June which is when they'll be in the area. My roofer says they'll do the solar panels, if they have to but they'd rather not. They're worried that they might break the panels. I'd like to honor the "rather not." I appreciate people who don't just say, "sure, no problem," when they don't really mean it.

The goal that I should put to rest? Probably writing. Maybe writing. I haven't given up on it yet, but . . .

Hi MSaD, continually under the crunch re: yuck chores around the condo. After reading Algorithms to Live By, I now accept that relationships in condos are intractable. This brings 3 puzzles:

1. Keeping motivated. Part of me screams that if this in intractable, why bother?

2. Time. As motivation drops, getting to the needed work requires more willpower. I've been aiming for 3 hrs a day (for a total of about 15) but yesterday I let everything slide and piddled about. It was my release day (the first after 5 days of hard work).

3. Turning off the incessant puzzle solver part of my mind that returns repeatedly to this place and what to do. Ans. do what I need to, be ready to respond to the rogues as legally allowed, and otherwise,

. Now to soothe my unbidden mind into believing that.

So, awoke this morning and doubled my hours, to 6, for today, and credited 1.5 hours for allowing my thinking to sit around in m'head and gain weight (Chekhov idea). So, 4.5 hrs, for everything related to condo.

So far, it's going OK. I'm about 3.5 hours in, and for part of the day I'll be outside scrapping moss off the fence and laying out Peanut Butter & Baking Soda to kill the rats. The baking soda suspends their breathing so that they essentially suffocate in about 24 hours. The PB is to draw them to the fatal mix. We'll see.

Also yesterday, I talked with a neighbor about sharing a haul of wood chips and dealt with some email about the condo.

Yuck stuff, and tomorrow is yet another day. R.

Hi, R.

I'm temporarily done with yuck stuff. My insurance extended the deadline for me to complete replacing my roof. Today, my favorite gardener is cutting down the branches over my roof, (required) and weed wacking my back yard. (Not required, but a treat for me. I'm getting too old for that.)

Meanwhile, I'm proofing and I'm starting a website.

Good vibes and good wishes to you. Especially with your condo challenges.

Back to the yuck. Tesla said they could move the solar panels in June. They gave me an estimate of $2400 to remove and replace the panels, and they said they could start in three months, and they'd be finished in six. I'm looking for other contractors who can do it, and can't find any.

Busy day today

Talked to the financial advisor who does my traditional IRA. He agrees that the Student Loan payments should come from the Roth IRA.

Had a follow up exam with my PCP. All the regular blood work looks good, but there's high iron saturation to investigate. Also blood pressure is creeping back up, so I'm back on that med. Plus, I complained about brain fog, so we figured that Nuvagil might be worth trying. (I've had it before -- it's pretty neat stuff.) And I'm being referred for a neuro-psyche exam. THAT should be interesting! LOL

Hmm, I'm thinking of a way of to suspend solar panels so they just float above your roof rather than sit anchored to it. It's not a practical way.... LOL

I'm gaining weight because I'm eating more. I'm eating more because, well, I just feel like it. It's probably time for another fast.

Ah, stuff just comes to us, unasked, n'est pas?

SPG, you may or may not be onto an idea. A highschooler for a science project worked out the math for how trees branch and stem and leaf to gain the maximum exposure to sunlight. Bug flurry at the time and offers of lots of money for the rights/patent but haven't noticed much in the market.

AND, sunflowers track the sun ... this could be pretty easy, an 'eye' that locates the brightest object in the sky then rotates the solar panel so it's always that center of the panel is facing the sun all day.

D, learning to grab our spaces between yucksville as we can. Keep searching.

Myself, this is the grief part, my aunt died yesterday. Age: 96. Making hurried arrangements to go to my hometown as she "wished" that my brothers and I would come to her memorial/funeral/burial. My cuz texted that it's in an "invitation" not an "obligation." Please. I got this.

This is likely my own last visit to my birth place. One last look around as time permits. Growing up funerals confused me because the person is dead, so why the bid deal? They're off the planet; don't care about earthly stuff anymore.

Oh—It's for the living, the witness to grief, the bodies which keep you standing, the gossip (did you see what he wore? Totally inappropriate ...) the witness to the display of wealth and relational networks.

A man named Steve in my long-running dinner discussion group on race, class, and politics called for his memorial while still alive. I went. Fabulous. He beamed the whole time. Off stage, women were jockeying for dates! Then we died, I really can't recall anything coming around about a second memorial. One life, one memorial. You die, it's been nice knowing you.

R

Hi all, I'm a bit sad as I won't let myself go to my aunt's funeral this Saturday. The airfare is just too darn high! Instead I'll mark a moment of silence around Noon: the start of the ceremony.

To balance my disappointment, I'm going to donate $300, $100 each for my mother, and 2 aunts who have died in the last 6 months. And I'll work for the social good for a few hours, considering my layover time was close to 5 hours for the round trip.

Will share this decision with my brother and cousin (it's for his mom) tomorrow morning. Began putting back the items in my staging box.

I'm going to keep the shirt I got as it will always remind me.

What I might have done, in retrospect, was bought my tickets right away with a travel/ticket change insurance rider for $170. This would have locked in the price and allowed me some assurance I could make changes should some last minute detail shift (say, the memorial needed to be held in a different day).

Side-sight I guess.

Oh well, R.

So sorry about your aunt's passing and especially the frustration about not being able to afford the travel expense.

The wake and funeral are held within a few days of death. But a memorial could be held much later, and, if scheduled now for next year, you'd have a good shot at getting a low airfare.

I don't recall my mother's funeral, but her memorial was a pleasant get-together, at least it was for me.

Started the Nuvigil on Tuesday, although I really needed it on Monday. All that day I looked forward to the moment I could collapse into bed, even while driving to work. Haven't noticed much effect; I'm taking 1/3 the recommended dose, though.

I plan to get the blood test tomorrow. Fridays are "work from home" (WFH) days for me, . The labs are nearby and I'll be able to get it done on a lunch break.

We got a quote to have real air conditioning installed in our home. It'll use up nearly all that's left on the HELOC. The electric service will need to be upgraded, too, and that's included.

Speaking of utilities, the telecom provider sent me a letter saying that optical fiber is available. If I switch I get a free router. If I don't I'm responsible for all repairs to my copper line. I looked online at the cost. Maybe it was a side effect of the meds, but it seemed that the 500Mbps optical service was cheaper than the 20Mbps DSL service I'm getting now. What's the catch? They're not really going to put fiber in my home, are they?

Hi SPG, I put your question to Chester, my friendly ChatGPT. This is what he wrote back after, oh, .05 seconds of thinking about it.

There could be several factors at play here. Some possible reasons why a 500Mbps optical service might be cheaper than a 20Mbps DSL service are:

Different technologies: DSL and optical services use different underlying technologies. Optical services, such as fiber-optic connections, generally offer higher speeds and more reliable performance compared to DSL.

Availability: The availability of high-speed optical services, especially fiber-optic connections, has increased in many areas. As competition grows, providers may offer more competitive pricing to attract customers.

Promotional offers: Providers often offer promotional discounts or introductory pricing to attract new customers. The cheaper price you're seeing could be a limited-time offer or part of a bundled package.

Contract terms: The pricing may depend on the contract terms and duration. Providers may offer lower prices for longer-term commitments or contracts with additional services.

Market competition: The competitive landscape and the presence of multiple service providers in your area can influence pricing. If there are multiple providers offering optical services, they may engage in price competition to gain market share.

It's essential to carefully review the details of any offer, including contract terms, potential data caps, equipment costs, and customer reviews, to ensure you understand the full scope of the service and any potential limitations or additional fees.

Yup, standard Chester answer with a disclaimer at the bottom.

Thanks D for the idea of a memorial being a better option. Not sure it might happen. We certainly don't plan one for my mom.

R.