[googley]

I had been feeling pretty good with my lack of urges to cut. But recently have been really depressed and it has come back. It is only intermittent but still a shock since it had been gone for a while. I always think it is gone and then it comes back. I feel so unlovable. I am having feelings coming back up about not being cared about and it is triggering. I have always just wanted someone to love me and never felt that my parents love me. Aren't your parents supposed to love you? I try to be a good person. Don't I deserve to be loved? How can I ever get anyone to love me if my parents wont love me? I feel so depressed I just want to curl up in a ball under my covers with my stuffed animal and not come out! It is all just too much. How am I supposed to succeed if I can't even make it through a period when I see a tough time ahead? Sometimes it feels like what is the point if I'm always going to be alone? I just feel so awful.

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((((( googley )))))))))))))))))

[moodycow]

Originally Posted by googley

I had been feeling pretty good with my lack of urges to cut. But recently have been really depressed and it has come back. It is only intermittent but still a shock since it had been gone for a while. I always think it is gone and then it comes back. I feel so unlovable. I am having feelings coming back up about not being cared about and it is triggering. I have always just wanted someone to love me and never felt that my parents love me. Aren't your parents supposed to love you? I try to be a good person. Don't I deserve to be loved? How can I ever get anyone to love me if my parents wont love me? I feel so depressed I just want to curl up in a ball under my covers with my stuffed animal and not come out! It is all just too much. How am I supposed to succeed if I can't even make it through a period when I see a tough time ahead? Sometimes it feels like what is the point if I'm always going to be alone? I just feel so awful.

[thinker22]

I think a lot of us have felt this way before. I sure know I've not wanted to get out of bed at all for weeks in a row. I've always heard it said, "How can you love other people unless you learn to love yourself first?"

I've always thought that was kinda dumb because I didn't feel very loved by my parents and I've had a hard time loving myself with all the flaws I see in me and mistakes I've made. I thought that at some point if just one other person loved me then I would really be lovable, then I could love myself.

Turns out that I got into a lot of not so good relationships because I was relying on them to make me feel a certain way. When I stopped going out with abusive people, I learned who I was and what I wanted and that I didn't deserve to be treated badly. I was lovable just because I am. Humans, animals, all of us are lovable. We can try hard to make ourselves unlovable, but unless we're truly determined, we will fail.

So after being alone for months I finally got into a good relationship with someone who loves and respects me and I feel the same for him. We've been together for 5 years. And I also learned that despite all the mistakes my parents made with raising me, they loved me also. I bet your parents love you too, it's just hard to see it when you're depressed.

Remember that your moods will always change, but your being lovable will not. You are great just the way you are. And we're all trying to get better, so that's all you need to do right now.

Don't hurt you. I've wanted to hurt me and have so many times. But what good does it do? It only makes you feel worse that you've given in. Feel better. Get yourself a treat, do something special and positive for you.