5 Days

It's been 5 days since I last cut. Before that it was a week and before that it was months. My goal is to make it til tuesday. I have a doctor's apt. and I'm hoping they don't notice and I have to explain. My arm is already a mess and I don't want to add to it. But herein lies the problem. I have no idea if I can make it or not. When I cut I just do it and everything happens real fast. I'm not dissociating but I feel like I don't have much control over it.

Usually what motivates me is stress and anxiety and that's at its worst around the end of the weekend, although I am thinking about cutting right now. It just feels like it's getting harder to control. I don't know what to do.

Its important to be honest with your docs,cause they are there for you and should be helping. It scares me when you say that you wanta hide it, I know its being harder for you right now, its impt to get the help and or meds you need to be healthy.

I'm currently seeing my psychiatrist every 2 weeks. We're still trying new medications. I quit therapy because of copays/fuel costs.

Andy, can you talk about your stress and anxiety instead of SI? So there is no way that you can handle the copays and the fuel costs? Therapy is essential to heal and, therefore, be able to stop SI.

Well I made it through the weekend without SI'ing.

That's great, Andy!